Stuck my tongue out
by siwisnuppa
Summary: Bella is back in Forks. she is the same,but still she is changed. Before she was one of the guys, will she be that this time?
1. Prolog

Prologue

A new car come into the parking-lot. It was an old rusty piece of shit. It parked in one of the few open spots left.

We all knew who it was, because in a small town like this everybody knows everything.

I wasn't really paying attention, suddenly Mike elbows me in the stomach and said, "look at that!"

I looked over to the car and saw one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen. She had these long legs that went on for miles. The cut of her pants fit her ass perfectly. I think I could have looked at that ass forever.

"That can't be her? Can it?" Mike said. I just stood there and shook my head, because Mike was right it could not be her.

Then she turned around, her hair was dancing in the air. The way her brown hair flowed perfectly over her shoulders and around her face, it was like watching a shampoo commercial or something like that.

She was looking at the ground as she walked to the office. Suddenly she looked up and I could see her big brown eyes. You could drown in them, I could look at them for days and never get bored.

I could feel a warm feeling in my stomach. That girl was smokin' hot, perfect even. As I was thinking that, she looked around the parking lot and her eyes met mine. She suddenly stopped looked right at me, smiled and stuck her tongue out. She turned and just kept walking right into the office.

Right then I knew it was her for sure, she had changed. Boy had she changed.


	2. Soon Back

BPOV

OMG! in two hours I will be back in Forks, the rainiest place on the planet. Well I did kind of miss the rain though. It's been 8 years since I have been there. When I was 8 my mom came and demanded that I go with her to Phoenix. I did not want to go. Dad didn't seem to put up much of a fight, so I just went. I took it kind of hard, I didn't think that my dad really wanted me there with him anymore.

As time went on I didn't talk a lot with my dad, I truly missed him so much. Last year I couldn't take it any longer so I called him, we have been talking every since. I now understand more about why he did what he did. He said that he could see how hard it was for me to choose so he kind of did it for me. I hate that I didn't hear my dad out when he tried to explain, because we have missed out on so much of each other's lives.

When I did leave Forks I didn't keep in touch with anyone. I didn't want to hear stuff about him, so I cut everyone out. It was hardest to cut Alice Cullen out, she was my best friend. We were nothing alike, I liked sports and she liked makeup, my pants were full of holes, hers were brand new. But we made it work, we just understood each other.

It was one thing that came with Alice that I didn't really like and that was her twin brother, Edward. He and I were a lot alike in some ways, and that didn't always go well. Edward and I both liked to play some of the same sports. We were always on opposite teams because we were too competitive with each other.

I guess it didn't help that I was a girl. I am sure he thought that he should always beat me due to his male genes. I guess I can understand that. I was always there, when he was with his friends and when he came home. His parents looked after me while my dad worked. The fact that Alice and I were best friends made it seem like the Cullen's place was my home too.

I have been missing them all and am looking forward to seeing them all again. I hope that we can leave the past in the past and start over.

My life changed a lot over the years; I got a step brother. That's the real reason my mom came to get me, she wanted to impress a man. He had a son around my age, his name is Emmett. I love him like he is my real brother. He´s sitting in the seat next to me on the plane to Forks right now. He wanted to come too and it didn't take long to convince my dad. He loved the idea of me coming home and bringing Emmett there didn't bother him that much. I know that they will get along great, but I'm still a little nervous about it all.

Soon the plane will be landing and then there will be a one hour drive to Forks. I just hope that the car drive will be ok and not awkward.


	3. Home,Sweet home?

BPOV

The car drive home was, well interesting to say the least. It was weird at first, dad was kind of eyeing Emmett up and down. It's to be expected, because Emmett is a big guy. He is the one you want on your side if you are ever in a fight. He is that big. When I stand next to him I feel really small, like _really_ small.

It's not like I'm tall, but I'm not that small either.

When Emmett and I met my dad, Emmett had his arm around me and I could tell that dad didn't like that. So it was not a great start, but Emmett and I were like that. He had his arm around me a lot. I liked it, in a brotherly way. It's not that Emmett isn't good looking because he is, but he is my brother, just from another mom and dad, you know?

I could see that dad was regretting it all already. So I shook Emmett's arm off of me and went to give my dad a hug. I have missed him so much. Dad was a little shocked at first, he isn´t a big hugger, but then he hugged me back. "I missed you Bells" my dad whispered. Dad is the only one to call me Bells, everyone else calls me Bella or you have someone that just has to call me Isabella and I hate it. Who calls me that you might wonder? Well I have not been called that since I was 8 (except some theaters call me that, and I hate those). I don't want to say names, but it was a he and he and my best friend are twins. So now you can guess.

After we had hugged Emmett come closer and put out his hand. "Dad, Emmett, Emmett, Charlie" Dad looked at Emmett once more with skepticism in his look and then back at me before he took Emmett's hand. "It's a pleasure to meet you Charlie, and thanks for having me." Charlie just nodded his head to what Emmett said.

We went to pick up the luggage. It was weird to say the least. Emmett took both mine and his suitcases, but dad took mine from him and walked toward the car.

I looked at Emmett as we walked after dad, "Sorry about that Em." he just laughed "It's okay, Bella. He just doesn't trust me yet. I think, he thinks we date or something like that."

I just stopped walking and looked at Emmett like he had grown a extra head.

"Where would he get that idea from?" Emmett just looked at me and shook his head at me.

I was shocked, dad had asked the last time we talked if I was dating. I said no and that was true. If I was dating it would not be Emmett. I know that we are not real brother and sister but we are just as close as if we were. That just seems wrong to me in so many ways.

Dad had put my suitcases in the police car and was now sitting in the car and waiting for us. I hated that my dad had brought that car to pick us up in.

Emmett is now going to sit back there where the criminals are supposed to be and I do not like that idea.

Emmett was putting his suitcases in the back and I took my place in the car in the front with dad. "You didn't have to lie Bells, it's okay but don't lie." dad looked almost hurt when he said that.

"What are you talking about Dad?"

"You and Emmett, your dating. I don't like it, in fact I hate the idea of you dating anyone. Bella don't lie about it, that just hurt." and I could see the hurt in his eyes.

" Dad look at me, I have not lied to you. I'm not dating him. I love him, but like a brother and he loves me like a sister. There is nothing more there. I don't know where you got the idea from, but that will never happen." Dad was looking at me and as I talked his face changed. I'm not sure he believed me, but before anymore could be said Emmett was sitting in the back seat.

"So off to jail with me!" Emmett said laughing in the back. I just smiled and shook my head, typical Emmett. Dad started the car and I was dreading this one hour drive. It hadn't gone well, so what was next now.

I tried to talk to dad, I started to ask about his day and when I got to the place where I was talking about the weather I just gave up. When I gave up the whole car was quiet, it was awkward. Too quiet and too awkward, so I turned on the radio. Some song was playing before the news started, nothing too interesting there, then some sports came on. When the results came, my dad started to comment on something, Emmett often agreed with him.

The rest of the way they talked sports, it was kind of like I wasn't even there. I know sports so I tried adding some things to the conversation that they were having. However it just seemed like they wanted me to take sides, just like in an argument. So I decided to just shut up and listen. Luckily I can talk some sports. I don't know as much as dad or Emmett, but for a girl, I know more than enough to impress.

By the time we were in Forks, Dad and Emmett were kind of best friends. I knew they would get along, but not as well as this and not after how it started.

We were driving through the streets in town now. I was looking around, and everything looked just the same. It somehow looked smaller then I remembered it, maybe because I have gotten bigger.

We turned up the street I used to call home for eight years, and now eight years later it would once again be home.

So I guess this is "Home Sweet Home"

Well we will see how sweet it will be, after I start school.


	4. Enough Already

EPOV

"She _is_ back Edward, Charlie was driving by and I saw her. I can't wait for tomorrow. It's going to be just like old times. " Alice my twin sister said just walking in to my room, without knocking I might add. I was on the computer trying to find this album, I just couldn't get my hands on and I hadn't had any luck now either.

Alice had taken a seat on my bed and I hadn't said anything yet, so she just kept going. "She probably looks good. With all the running she used to do, I bet she has a killer body." I had heard that before. Mike had gone on and on about the fact that Isabella Maria Swan was going to come back here. She was more or less all people talked about for the past weeks.

I had never been a Bella Fan, its been eight years since she left and for me it wasn`t long enough. The way she left, well I kind of hated her for it. Alice was so depressed, she had tried to keep in touch with Bella by writing. Bella never wrote back, like she was better off or something.

When Alice had heard that Bella was coming back she was just so happy to have an old friend back. Typical Alice, she never thinks about the negative things in life for too long and I love her for it. Right now though she won't shut up about Bella and I think I have heard enough.

" Alice" I interrupted her. "Yes, Edward" she said a little annoyed.

"Do you mind, I don't care about Isabella. I've heard enough about her. She´s all everybody has talked about for weeks now. I didn't really like her when she lived here last time, and after she just took off with her mother." I sighed letting that sentence hang in the air before continuing, "look, Alice she didn´t call you or write you back when you tried to keep in touch with her. I really don't think I am going to like her this time either

Alice just looked at me and shook her head saying, "you need to let that go you know. I have and the last part just happened to me, not you."

" You were depressed. You used to cry about it. I heard it, so no reason to deny it." I was starting to get annoyed now.

" I know, I know, but life goes on Edward and I miss her. She was my best friend and I want her back. It's time for you to suck it up and get over yourself." She almost yelled at me before she got up and left my room.

I know she is right, but I'm to stubborn to say that to her, at least for now.

XxXx

Alice didn`t talk to me during dinner. I think she is still a little mad at me for what I said, but it's not like I said something that isn`t true.

She talked a lot about Bella, she hoped things would be like old times. I didn`t say much. I didn`t want Alice to be more mad at me than she already was. When Alice talked about the old days, I kind of started to understand her point. Alice had had many friends after Bella left, but none as good as Bella.

After dinner I helped mom clean up and of course she sensed that Alice and I were not on good terms. So after a little silence mom said, "okay Edward what`s wrong between you and Alice now? Who did what?"

"It's nothing mom, I said some things that I just should have kept to myself." I was not in the mood to tell mom. I knew that she would tell me how wrong I was.

"Like what?" I knew that she wouldn't give up when she asked.

" I told her to shut up about Bella and that I don't like that Bella was back." Mom just gave me that look. _You know the look, the one where she says that you better have a good reason for it._

I had been brought down with the look so I decided to just tell her everything.

"Bella and I were never good friends, but Alice and she were. So when she just left and didn't even try to keep in touch with Alice, not even when Alice tried to. I have a right not to like her." I was starting to get frustrated now. "I know she didn`t do it to me, but she hurt Alice and I don't no if you know about it. Bella went without saying goodbye or anything, Alice got really hurt and for a long time she cried herself to sleep or cried when she slept."

I was walking around in circles now, just so I wouldn't yell.

"I know that she did that, but maybe Bella had her reasons to do what she did."

I just stopped and looked at my mom in shock, was she defending Bella? why would she do that?

"YOUR DEFENDING HER." I couldn't hold it back now.

"No Edward not really, but there could be more to the story. That's all I'm saying." Mom looked at me for a bit after she had said it. Then it came, what I had been waiting for. "Don't raise your voice at me, we talk in this house, not yell."

"Sorry mom, but I don't like seeing Alice hurt and I can't help that I don't like the people that do. I love her." I said, to try to get on moms good side again, and it wasn`t a lie. "I know Edward, but remember there is always two sides to a story." Mom gave me a weak smile then walked out of the kitchen.

I stood in the kitchen for a bit before I left. When I was walking to my room, I passed Alice. She just looked at me smiled and said, "I love you too, but I can take care of myself." before entering her room and closing the door.

As I walked to my room I was thinking, _I know you can but I can still help_. I went straight to bed when I entered my room. My last thought before I fall asleep was, tomorrow is going to be a long day.


	5. She s back

EPOV

"EDWARD" I jumped up, looked around to see Alice standing in the door laughing. "Just waking you up." She said before turning and walking away to get ready for school. I wanted to just turn around and go back to sleep but I couldn´t, I had a paper that I had to turn in. Besides who wouldn´t want to see Bella´s first day back at school. Well, me for one, but since I didn´t know how Alice was going to be I had to go. I just hope that Bella will be good to Alice and that they will be friends again, Alice needs that.

I put on my clothes and head down stairs to get something to eat. Not that a good breakfast would make my day, just like yesterday I can't handle more talk about Bella. She is starting school today so I have to suck it up and hope that she will be old news fast.

As I was eating Alice come down and sat next to me, she was about to say something but stopped herself and just started to eat from the plate mom had placed in front of her. "Just say it Alice." she looked at me before she started, "but you don't want to hear it."

"Come on when has that ever stopped you before?" I said laughing to try to lift the mood a little bit.

"I now, but I don't want to be mad at you or have you mad at me. Me talking about Bella isn´t doing us any good." She looked so sad when she said it that I didn´t know what to do.

"Hear me out Alice." She was about to protested, but I just kept going. "She was your best friend and I get it. I hate what she did and I don't understand why she didn´t keep in touch with you. Moms right, there could be more to the story then you or I know. I do understand that you don't want to think about that. I get that you just want to start over with her. So I won't say anything to her about it, and if you two are friends again after this I won't have a problem with it. Well not a big problem."

I didn´t get to say more before Alice hugged me. "You are the best, you will forgive and forget, you just need time." I was just shaking my head an laughing with her. Maybe she´s right, but I don't think so.

We just talked until it was time to go to school.

XxXx

I was driving and we were picking up Jasper and his sister Rosalie. They have lived in Forks for two years now. Alice is dating Jasper and I think they are getting pretty serious.

Jasper is a cool guy. I have come to terms with the whole thing, except for when they make out in front of me.

As soon as we arrived at school, Alice dragged Jasper with her to fix something. We were a little early because Alice was hoping to be done with whatever she had to do before Bella showed up.

I just walked up to one of the benches that was in front of the school to wait. Mike came up to me asking, "have you seen Bella yet?" I didn´t have the time to answer because he just kept going "I heard some people saying that they saw her in her dads police car yesterday." Just as he finished saying that a 'new' old car pulled into the school parking lot.

The car that pulled in was an old rusty piece of shit. It parked in one of the few open spots left.

We all knew who it was, because in a small town like this everybody knows everything.

I wasn't really paying attention, suddenly Mike elbows me in the stomach and said, "look at that!"

I looked over to the car and saw one of the most beautiful girls I have ever seen. She had these long legs that went on for miles, all the way up to her cute ass. Her pants fit her ass perfectly. I think I could have looked at that ass forever.

"That can't be her? Can it?" Mike said. I just stood there and shook my head, because Mike was right it could not be her.

Then she turned around, her hair was dancing in the air. The way her brown hair flowed perfectly over her shoulders and around her face, it was like watching a shampoo commercial or something like that.

She was looking at the ground as she walked to the office. Suddenly she looked up and I could see her big brown eyes. You could drown in them, I could look at them for days and never get bored.

I could feel a warm feeling in my stomach. That girl was smokin' hot, perfect even. As I was thinking that, she looked around the parking lot and her eyes met mine. She suddenly stopped looked right at me, smiled and stuck her tongue out. She turned and just kept walking right into the office.

Right then I knew it was her for sure, she had changed. Boy had she changed.

I was kind of shocked and jumped a little when Mike started to speak, "so if that's Bella she sure has changed."

"That was Bella, only Bella would do that." Mike just looked at me, I didn´t know if it was because he was in shock or because he didn´t know what I was talking about.

The warning bell rang and I just made my way to class, hoping to see Bella again.


	6. What am I? Five?

BPOV

OMG.

_I can't believe I did that. What am I five?_

I sure act like I am when I do stuff like that.

It's all Emmett's fault he had to go and get sick on me. He was fine when we got to Dads yesterday. I always had to wake him up for school. He was burning up with a fever this morning when I went to wake him, so I decided to just let him sleep.

I really hated the idea of having to go without him. That meant that I had to face my first day at Forks High school alone. I am not happy about it but not much I can do about it now.

I decided I should just get dressed. Of course that meant I had to wear my lucky jeans. I was going to need all the good luck I could get today. My top was just a plain white one, because I didn´t feel like getting to dressed up. I didn´t like to put too much thought into getting dressed. I mean I'm plain and I know it, so why waste a lot of time being something I'm not?

I headed down stairs into the kitchen where my dad was.

"Where´s Emmett?" He asked.

"He has a fever, so I'm letting him sleep and I'm going to school alone today." Dad just nodded and continued to eat. I fixed myself a little breakfast and started eating. Dad got up and was about to go to work, when he stopped and said, "oh, Bella I got you a car. Its old, but it runs. It will get you to and from school. The keys are in the bowl on the counter. Good luck at school." Before I could say anything he turned and headed out the door, closing it behind him.

I was in shock. Dad had got me a car? I just sat there for a while not knowing what to think. When I finally looked at clock I realized I had to get going or I would be late for my first day.

I quickly finished shoving the rest of my breakfast in my mouth. Then found the keys in the bowl, right where dad said they would be. I was on my way out the door when I stopped. Emmett was coming down the stairs, he looked terrible.

"Sorry Bella, I didn´t mean to get sick. I know you have been dreading this for months." His voice was low and ruff, not at all what Emmett's voice sounds like normally. He was looking sad and since I knew him pretty well, I knew he felt like he was letting me down. _Yes I'm selfish so I can say it. He is letting me down._

I let out a heavy sigh then said,

"I love you Em and I know you didn´t mean to get sick. I still wish you were going with me." I smiled at him. "I'm not looking forward to this, but I'm a big girl and I can take care of myself. Oh and besides my dad got me a car, so I don't have to walk all the way." I was showing Emmett the key with a big smile on my face. He was standing in front of me with a big smile of his own, when he grabbed me up into one of his big bear hugs.

"So you are a big girl now? You can take care of yourself? I don't think so. See because if that's true, then I'm out of a job." He was laughing when he said it. "You get going or you'll be late for school."

"Okay Em, Bye." I said, then I was out the door.

The first thing I saw when I got outside was an old rusty truck.

Guess that's my "new" car. Okay I was not expecting a car from dad, but when he said he had gotten me a car I was expecting something different. I'm just happy I didn't have to walk to school. I hopped in the truck and tried starting it. It started with a growl and I was on my way.

XxXx

The drive was short. I was about to turn in to the school parking lot but my nerves were getting the best of me. My stomach was killing me. _All I could think was maybe I shouldn't have eaten breakfast this morning._

I parked and was happy to see that mine wasn´t the piece of shit in the lot. _If I was being honest with myself I really like the car dad got me. I know it was old but it seemed to suite me._

Before I got out, I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. I opened the door and slid out at a snail's pace. '_You can do this Bella_.' I repeated over and over to myself.

Even though I was looking at the ground, I could feel all the eyes on me. I kept my eyes down and made sure that my hair was covering my face. _Thank God that I didn´t have my hair up today_. As I was walking to the main building, I got a little more brave and started to look around. Some of the faces seemed familiar. Suddenly my eyes met someone else's. They were green and they were looking right into mine. I hurried to look past them. I knew that I had seen them before, but where? I was still walking when it hit me. I stopped dead in my tracks and turned around to see if I was right.

I was looking for the eyes of the guy that had made me miserable when I used to live here. I found them. He was looking at me too. I looked him up and down, then up again. It seemed that he was doing the exact same. I didn´t know what to do, so I did what I always did to him. I stuck my tongue out. After that I turned around and hurried to get to the office.

I do not know why I did what I just did. It happened so fast that I couldn't stop myself.

I used to do that to Edward all the time before, instead of saying hi, I stuck my tongue out.

When I won or got my way, I stuck my tongue out.

When he won or got his way, I stuck my tongue out.

And the weird part is that I only did it to Edward. Partly because I knew that it bothered him and partly because I didn´t know how to act around him.

All of that is fine when your five or even eight, but not sixteen. This was really bugging me now.

Something else that was bugging me was that Edward had changed. I mean really changed. He was totally HOT.

The most important thing now was to not have Edward think I was stuck in the mind of a five-year-old little girl, because I'm not.

I have got to pull myself together.

I took a deep breath for the second time today and continued walking forward. I walked towards what I hoped was the office to get my schedule.

As I turned the first corner, there in front of me stood someone I was kind of happy to see. On one hand yes I was happy, on the other I wasn't sure I was ready to face that particular someone.

I just stopped, closed my eyes and held my breath. I wished to myself that this was not happening. I could not handle this right now.

I needed Emmett.


	7. Can I do this?

BPOV

Right before me stood the one person I did not want to meet right away. The one person I had hurt the most with my leaving. The one person I never wrote back and didn't even say goodbye to. The one person I had hurt plain and simple.

_Alice_

She was standing with her back to me. Standing next to her was a blonde guy and from what I could see of him, he was good looking. Not that I could see much. They were talking to a blonde girl, who looked like she belonged on a catwalk or a magazine cover. Not Forks High School.

_I could just turn around, walk out, drive home and act sick. Maybe I could even go back to Phoenix._

I did think I could handle this. I was just not ready for it. _How would she act?_ I knew that she wouldn't act like a bitch. She wasn´t really like that. She was always good to me. Some may say she was always a little too good to me.

My brain was on overload with what to do. The blonde girl nodded her head toward where I was standing and said something to her. I knew that I had to keep going, it was too late to turn around now.

So I started to walk closer to them.

It was her I had a hard time facing, I had never seen the blonde girl or boy before. As I walked, I tried to keep my head up. I had to have a cold face, no emotions showing. If I didn't then they would see how nervous I was. I had to keep my eyes still and act cold. This was so hard. I wished more and more that Emmett was here. This would be so much better with him. _Strong in numbers but not alone._

I saw her start to turn and I wished that it wasn´t her. I closed my eyes a little longer then just blinking. When I opened them she stood facing me. She just looked at me, not saying anything. I could not meet her eyes as I was moving closer, afraid that if I did I would run away.

I could see her face but I couldn´t see any emotions on it. Maybe she would be a bitch. _Could I handle her being a bitch to me?_ I knew right away that I couldn´t. I was now closer to her or them. I saw the blonde boy pull her to him, putting his arms around her. She had her man, she found him. I could see that he loved her. You could see it in his eyes and the protective way he had put his arm around her. Then the girl stepped next to them looking at me in a way I didn´t like. _Why had I come back?_

I just stopped and looked at Alice. The only girl that had ever been my Best friend. There was only one other girl that had ever tried to be my best friend. However she was just using me to get closer to Emmett. After that I sort of shut myself off and didn't allow anyone to get close again.

Alice was looking at me. I didn´t know what to do. _Should I turn around and run for it, continue walking or say something?_

"The office is this way right?" I started with something that she couldn´t say to many bad things to. I really hoped she was going to be a little nice. If she wasn´t going to be then I hoped that she would just ignore me. She could even act like I wasn´t even there if that is what she wanted to do.

_I hated this. Not knowing how she was going to act towards me. That was the worst part or so I kept telling myself._

Alice hadn´t said anything, but her face looked different. Kind of sad, hurt even. She looked to the floor, then at the ceiling before she started to shake her head. No one was saying anything. I looked at Alice and she me, then she turned and walked or ran away from me. The blonde girl looked angry, and started to walk closer to me. I was scared but then the boy took her hand and she looked his way. He nodded his head in the direction Alice had walked. She turned and headed the same way.

"I´m Jasper" he said as he put his hand out to me. I took it saying, "I´m Bella"

He laughed a little, shook his head and said, "I know" I was about to ask how he knew but he kept going "people have been talking about you a lot. Well for the last few weeks anyway."

"Oh" was my brilliant replay to that. "Is the office that way?" I asked again.

Again he laughed at me, "yes, yes it is"

"I should go." I said. Then I started to walk to the office.

I had only walked a short distance away from _Jay, no James, no Jasper. Yeah that was his name_. Jasper yelled my name from where we had talked. "You have been missed a lot the years you have been gone. Many people have missed you."

I just stood there. I didn´t know what to do or say. So there I was staring off the way Jasper had disappeared to. _What did he mean?_ _Did Alice miss me?_ _How many people were many?_ GOD, this is hard. _Why am I here alone?_ Emmett promised he be here with me. I know I am being silly. He wasn´t even going to be with me when I made the decision to come back to Forks. Once he decided to come with me I had counted on him. _Safety in numbers, or so they say._

The bell rang bringing me back to reality. _Great now I am going to be late for class._ I still had to go to the office first. _Damn I hate to be late._

I walked fast to the office. "Um, sorry. I'm new here." I said to the lady behind the desk. She look up on me.

"Hey, welcome to Forks High. You must be Isabella Swan?" I just nodded my head. "Here is everything you need. A map of the campus, a slip you need all your teachers to sign and of course your schedule." I took the paper from her giving her a weak 'thanks' as I walked away. "Oh sorry I almost forgot, this is your locker number and code. You have some good friends here Miss Swan. Have a nice day."

_Why do people keep telling me that?_

The only friend I could think of was Alice. I was really, really hoping that she still wanted to be my friend.

I looked at the map a little bit. Alice and I had been here many times before, that I knew the layout. We used to fantasize about what High school would be like for us when we finally got to be here.

I had never thought it would be like this.

Me being the 'new' girl sucked. I didn't know where I stood with Alice or any of the others I used to call my friends. The worst part is that this, is all my fault.

I walked out of the building and I could see my truck from here. As I looked at it I wanted more and more just to go and drive away from here. Drive to a place where no one knew me. _Could I just drop everything and everyone just because of one little misunderstanding._

I didn´t know. I didn´t want to explain to everyone here that I thought that my dad didn´t love me. That's why I couldn´t keep in touch, it hurt too much. I didn´t want to appear weak. I always held my head high the day I left. Here though, it was so hard to do. They knew me, this was the one place I had never put up an act just to fit in or to not seem weak.

_So how should I act towards them?_

_How was I suppose to not let everything effect me here?_

They did know a lot of what had happened but not everything. Here though things I could put behind me everywhere else were out in the open.

_So could I do this?_


	8. Have could she?

EPOV

As I walked to my locker all I could think about was her big warm brown eyes.

_Had they always been that warm, that big or even that brown before?_

One thing I know for sure, she had changed and not in a bad way. _At least not in the body department._ If she is the same girl or not I didn´t know yet. It's weird though because for some reason I just had to find out. I hadn´t even wanted her to come back. Now I can't get her out of my head and I´m kind of glad that she did. The only thing to do now is to go to class, act like nothing and talk to Alice when we get home.

I was now at my locker. It seemed to take a lot of time to get here. I had walked ridiculously slow. I opened my locker just as Alice come running up to me and threw her arms around me.

"She didn´t even say 'hi' or anything. She just looked at me like I was a stranger." Alice kept rambling on but I didn´t hear everything she was saying. I was looking for Jasper knowing he could not be far behind when Alice was like this. I didn´t see him at all, but Rose was coming our way. I had put my arms around Alice and was trying to calm her down.

"Alice" I tried to get her to listen to me. All I could understand was the first two things she said. Just as Rose had made it to us, Alice stopped talking. "Alice what happened? Tell me a little slower, please."

Alice let go of me and took a few steps back. I was a little shocked by what I saw. Alice had tears running down her cheeks. "I saw Bella." nothing more come out._ Was that was all the information I was going to get? She saw Bella?_ I also heard her say something that sounded like Bella looked at her like a stranger. So Bella had just acted like she didn´t know her? Okay so maybe Bella didn't remember Alice. She sure had remembered me. That´s just wrong. Bella could just be nervous and didn´t know what to do or how to handle seeing Alice again.

Bella may have been a little afraid. People here know what happened. It´s not like we all only have one or two memories of her. Bella could be just like her old self or nothing like that at all.. The more I think about it, the more I´m glad that it´s not me in Bella´s place.

Jasper finally found us. He explained what had happened and I have to say that I didn´t like what I was hearing. _Should I just hate her like I always had, or ignore her?_ The problem wasn´t that she had just ignored Alice. It was that she had acted like she didn´t know her or remember her at all.

We talked and all I could think about is that I couldn´t believe that Bella had done that. If she had done it to me I would not have thought much about it. Simply put we were never friends. Alice and Bella were always friends though and I just had to accept that Bella would be hanging around.

XxXxXx

The bell rang and we were off to class. Alice and I had our first class together so I grabbed her hand and started walking.

"Edward, do you think that she maybe just didn´t recognize me?" I looked at Alice really wanting to say yes, but I would be lying and I couldn´t do that to her.

"Um, I don't know Alice" I didn´t like the way her eyes looked at the moment. "I want to say yes Alice, but I don't think so. I do think that she may have her reasons."

"Are you defending her?" Alice just stopped when she said it. Her mouth was opened like she was going to say something, but didn´t know how or what to say.

"Alice we are late as it is, come on." I took her hand again and dragged her with me. "I am not defending her. I'm just saying that maybe she has a reason for acting like that."

"You are defending her." Alice was laughing now. "I never thought I would hear you defend little tomboy Bella Swan." She just kept laughing all the way to class. Mr. Brandon had already started class and wasn´t pleased with us being late. He gave us a look as we took our seats. Mr. Brandon went back to what he was talking about before Alice and I had disturbed the class.

It wasn´t long before there was a soft knock on the door. Mr. Brandon didn´t like when people were late. Mike wasn´t here yet and he should be. I knew he was at school, since I had talked to him already today.

I looked to the door, couldn't help it. I liked to see their faces when they got into trouble. The stupid part here is that I had just come in through that door only seconds ago.

Mr. Brandon opened the door, looking angry then he softened really quick.

"Little Bella, back in Forks. I Can't believe it´s you." He even laughed. We had never heard him laugh before. What was even worse was that he was blocking me from seeing Bella. "Oh hey Ca... sorry, Mr. Brandon. I´m sorry I´m late." Bella said in a sweet soft voice.

"Don't worry about it Bella. It's your first day and all." Mr. Brandon said, stepping aside and guiding Bella into the classroom. "Class this is Bella Swan. Bella take the Seat there. He pointed for her to sit in between me and Alice. I looked at Alice, but she was not looking at me. In fact Alice wasn´t looking at anything, her eyes was closed and her head was down.

This was the worst thing that could have happened right now.

Bella was not smiling anymore. She had this serious look on her face.

"Can you stay behind after class Miss Swan, I need to have a word with you." Bella turned to Mr. Brandon, smiled and nodded before walking towards me. Only she didn't walk to me but the seat next to me.

_She was so beautiful, even more so when she smiled._

Her smile had disappeared the second she saw Alice and me.

_Why was that?_

Did she know Mr. Brandon? He was a new teacher and had just moved here.

Bella could not have known him from when she lived here before.

He seemed to know her too though. _Weird_

She took her seat than did the last thing I was expecting. She turned towards me and looked me right in the eyes. Her brown eyes looked so sad. Slowly she turned around and looked at Alice before facing the front of the room.

I looked at Alice, but she still had her head down.

Most of class went by with me trying to see if Alice was okay.

_Oh yeah also I was staring at Bella constantly._

_God she was Gorgeous._

Had she changed so much from the way she used to be?

Not just in how she looked, but in the way she used to act?

I hoped not, for Alice's sake. I don't care either way. Not at all.

_Shit maybe I do, No... Yes.. No.._

This is so hard.


	9. Why and Who?

EPOV

After class I was going to try to stay a little to hear what Mr. Brandon had to say to Bella. Alice wanted me out of there as fast as possible it seemed. She took my hand and dragged me out of the room. I for one did not like this brooding Alice. She should be happy, jumping up and down. She should really be jumping up and down today with Bella being back and all. _This is so wrong._ I looked at Alice and she looks so, I don't know. The best way to describe is like a sad little girl, I think. The reason she looks like a little girl right now is not because she is short, it's all in the look on her face.

Her eyes look so lost and hurt, really all of her looks hurt. She has her arms wrapped around herself. Like she is trying to keep herself from falling apart. The worst part of all of this, is that the person that has done this to her doesn't even know she did it.

"How was class?" Jasper asked as he come up to us. Guess he hasn´t seen Alice´s face yet. Alice looked up at Jasper and he immediately put his arms around her. "That bad? What happened?" Alice just stood there in Jasper arms without saying anything. This was not my place to say anything. Alice was the one that had to tell him it was her decision. We just stood there for a little while, until Jasper couldn't take the silence any more.

"Alice what´s wrong? Can you please tell me?" Jasper asked.

"She´s in my class. In my stupid class and even worse, she sits right next to me!" Alice was about to say something else, when Bella walked right past us. I looked at her, I would never get over just how much she changed. She was a new Bella.

She looked different from this morning, her eyes were off. They had been so playful this morning and in class they were cold like she was trying to hide something. You could also see that she was nervous. Now they looked hurt, sad and something else I just couldn`t place. She looked at the flour with her shoulders down. She was nothing like she had been this morning in the parking lot.

_What had happened? Did this have something to do with her talking to Mr. Brandon? Had she heard what Alice had said?_

Then again it could also be something else. Bella hadn´t looked like she cared that Alice or I was in the class.

Bella disappeared and I wanted to follow, but what would Alice say if I did? I had to stay, Alice needed me now. My eyes followed Bella until she rounded a corner out of my site.

After I couldn't see her anymore I turned back to Alice and Jasper. Alice had this lost look in her eyes, she come to me and put her arms around me for comfort.

_This is weird._

She never comes to me for comfort when she had Jasper close by. This had to be bad. I put my arms around her as well and patted her one the back.

"I lost her, haven´t I?" Alice said sadly. I didn´t know what to say to her. I wasn't sure if she had or not. "I should have just ran to her when I first saw her and gave her a big hug." I could hear that she wasn´t far from tears now.

I told Jasper to go to class. Jasper said that he would give the teacher a reason why. I took Alice out to my car. I needed to talk to her to really hear what she thought about all this.

XxXxXx

Once we were in the car Alice just sat there. At first I didn´t say anything but then I couldn't let the silence go any longer.

"She recognized me" was all I said. I had to see how she would take that.

Alice just looked at me while she processed what I said to her. Looking into her eyes I could see that she didn´t know what to believe.

"Your kidding me right?" I didn't get a chance to answer because Alice kept going. "Don't answer that. Of course she did, your Edward Cullen! Who cares about me? I'm just your stupid sister. I was her friend for eight years. Her Best Friend might I add. I tried to keep in touch, I -I-I.." she was crying now. She even hit me a few times. "I was her friend, not you. You didn´t even like her, or at least you acted like you didn´t. This isn´t fair!" She just sat there for a little while. Tears running down her cheeks. She finally wiped the tears away. Alice turned around and looked at me before saying,

"how do you know she recognized you?" I went with what made me 100% sure she remember me and recognized me.

"She stuck her tongue out at me." Alice laughed a little and I started telling her about how she was in the parking lot. Keeping the part of me liking her 'new body' to myself.

"I guess it's my turn now right?" Alice said after I was finished.

"If you want to. It´s all up to you Alice." We sat in the back seat with my arm over her shoulders.

"I was standing just down the hall from the office talking to Rose and Jasper. Rose said that the new girl was down the hall. I turned around, kind of happy but also nervous. You know what if she didn´t recognized me. When I turned around I see her walking to where we stood. What I saw was not Bella. At least not my old BFF Bella anyway. She had no emotion in her eyes or on her face at all. When she first looked at me it was like I was a nobody. All she asked, in this cold voice was if this is the way to the office." Alice kept playing with my fingers. "I just couldn´t be there. Not with her looking at me like that and talking in that voice. It was hell and I for one didn´t even know what to say. I just stood there looking her up and down and when or eyes meet I just ran."

Alice finished with a little laugh that sounded so sad. One I have never heard from Alice before.

She turns to look at me. "I could have said something. Like nice to have you back or good to see you, you look great. I mean anything really but no I just ran. This is hard.

_That's what I have been saying!_

To make matters worse I think, she thinks that I hate her back."

"Can I say something?" I waited because I didn´t want to say something if Alice didn´t want to hear what I had to say.

"No..." she said shaking her head, then she looked at me and said, "come on Cullen out with it." I laughed "Cullen huh? Don't know if I want to tell you now _Cullen_." She laughed to this time.

"Come on Edward" she looked at me and I couldn´t say no to her.

"Maybe she didn´t know what to say or do just like you. Plus you had both Jasper and Rose there with you Alice. We both know that Rose can be scary. So with that plus the part where she left without saying goodbye. She didn't keep in touch with you. I would bet that she was just as scared as you were." Alice just looked at me like I have five heads or something. It started to creep me out. "WHAT?" I couldn´t stand this.

"You are definitely defending Bella now." Alice said, "It's just weird, to hear you do it. Now that I heard what you have said, you may be right. It could be weird for her too, but she could have at least said 'hi' or something."

We went quite after that. I put some music on and we didn´t say anything more before the class bell rang. We then made our way back inside. Alice found Jasper and I went to my locker to get some books

XxXxXx

After the class I and Alice skipped not much happened.

_That is, not before lunch anyway._

I was walking alone to the cafeteria, I was meeting up with Alice and the others. I saw Bella sitting in a corner of the hall alone. I thought about asking her what was up with her and why she acted the way she did to Alice. Then I heard her talk, she was on the phone with someone.

"They hate me here." she almost whispered. She listened to the person on the other end of the line. "But this is hard." She went quite for a long time I thought maybe she had hung up when I heard her say,

"I wish you were here Emmett. I need you here. I can´t do this, the one that came up with this idea should be shot." She was quite a little longer before she kept going. " Yea, yea. You love me too much."

Did I hear right, loves her too much? Who is this Emmett guy? _What a stupid name._

Then she started to talk again."Of course I love you to. See you when I get home." Then she laughed this beautiful laugh. It sounded like angels. If it wasn´t for what she just had said to this guy on the phone, I would be in heaven. "Yea bye Em" she put her phone away after that. I watched as she Put her head on her knees and sighed. I walked out of the building fuming, that was not what I wanted to hear.

I sat down on one of the benches and tried to figure out all of this stuff running around my head.

_Who was this Emmett guy?_

_Why did he love her?_

The thing I wanted to know most was; _Why did she love him?_

_Did she have a boyfriend?_

_Did he move with her?_

_Was he living with her now?_

_Was she living with him? She did say she would see him when she got home._

I for one did not like any of this. Why did she have to love someone already?


	10. Not now! Not here!

BPOV

This had been a weird day, half day really. It was just now lunch and I had to call Emmett. I'm selfish, I don't care if he is sick and sleepy. I needed him _NOW!_ Even just to hear him tell me that everything will be okay. Yea that's what I needed.

I took my I-phone out and scrolled to Emmett's number. I hit the send button and waited, Emmett answered after two rings.

"Bella. Do you miss me that much?" Emmett`s happy and safe voice come thru the phone.

"Something like that yea." My voice was off and I could tell that Emmett heard it.

"What happened girl?" All the happiness from Emmett´s voice was gone now.

I told him about how I had made a fool out of myself, just so I didn´t seem weak around Alice. I told him how I thought that, that made things even worse than they had to be. Well I hoped that I had not made thing worse. I did not like to think that if I had talked to Alice like I was planning on that thing would have gone so bad.

I also talked to him about Mr. Brandon. Emmett did get a kick out of that. Carl or Mr. Brandon was Emmett´s cousin. When I was ten I had had a crush on him. Emmett thought at the time that it was funny so therefore everyone knew about it. Including Carl. How embarrassing this was going to be.

After class I had to stay behind and talk to him. I hadn´t seen him since I was eleven. Emmett had a good laugh though. In fact it was such a good laugh that I was starting to think that he was not as sick as he seemed this morning.

But all that ended when I told him what happened after class. He was silent, didn´t say anything.

"They hate me here." I whispered, I didn´t know what else to say and I didn´t like that Emmett hadn´t said anything yet.

"Look Bella, give it time. It's going to be okay and you know it. If Alice was as good of a friend as you have told me, then it will be okay. It just needs some time." Emmett was serious now.

"But this is hard."

"If you expected this to be easy, then you would have gone in there and acted like it was nothing. You would not be scared, you would have talked to Alice." He was silent a little bit before he kept going, "but one thing I do know for sure is you and Alice will be friends again. I have read the letters you know and she cares about you. Get a grip on yourself and be strong."

"I wish you was here Emmett. I need you here. I can't do this, the one that came up with this idea should be shot." In a way I really meant it.

"Ohh, your just saying that because you know I would never do it..." He was about to keep going but I beat him to it. "Yea, yea you love me too much."

He laughed a little "Hey wait a minute, don't you love me back?"

"Of course I love you too. See you when I get home."

"Okay. See you monkey. Are you still crushing on the teacher? Just kidding. See ya. " I laughed a little before I ended with "Yea, bye Em".

I put my phone away. I could hear someone walk down the hall as I put my head on my knees and sighed.

I sat there, not looking up. Not even when I heard someone getting closer. There was at least two of them and one had to be a girl. She was wearing high heels. They stopped right in front of me but I didn´t look up.

One of them sat down right in front of me and the other one at my side. I was trapped. That's because I had sat in a corner. _Stupid, stupid me.._

"Have you seen Edward?" I was shocked to say the least. It was Alice. She was sitting in front of me and talking to me.

"No" was all I said. Then she hit me, not hard but still she hit me, on the head even. I was so shocked that I laughed a little.

"Are you laughing at me?" Alice wasn´t happy now and I could hear it. She was irritated with me. I could hear that she didn´t really know why she was talking to me. It was all in her voice.

"No not really." I answered. Not knowing if I should say more or not. When I was sure she wasn´t going to say something I kept going. "I´m just shocked that you are talking to me that's all. You know the worst part is that I sat in the seat next to you, remember?"

I was looking at her now just a little and I had a little smile on my lips, even if it didn´t reach my eyes.

"It wasn´t like that!" Alice almost yelled. "And you know it!" She lowered her voice and kept going. "You didn´t say good bye, you didn´t write me back. You wrote to my brother, you acted like you didn´t remembered me, you, you, you..." Alice didn´t know what to say now, then suddenly "You stuck your tongue out at Edward!"

When she shouted it, it sounded so stupid that I just had to laugh and so did Alice, a little.

I bit my lip and so for the first time today I saw how hurt Alice really was.

_How was I going to explain this and not tell too much or too little?_

_I just had to jump into it and do it easy. Saying to little was probably the best._

"Mom had tickets for the day after and we had to go right away, therefore no goodbyes." It wasn´t a lie, but not the full truth either. "I missed you so much that, reading and writing you back hurt too much. You with all your friends, I knew you would find a replacement fast. At least that was what I kept telling myself. Did you ever read what I wrote to Edward?" Alice just shook her head. "It was short and I don't remember exactly, but something about that he was right and that I didn´t want you or him to write to me again. I guessed that he didn´t tell you because you kept writing a little now and then. I didn´t know how to act, so I just asked that stupid question because Jasper and her were there." I nodded to my side where the blonde girl sat. "The same goes for Edward, he was looking at me funny. I didn´t know what to do so I just did what I used to do." I smiled a little, I wanted to go on but was afraid to, so I just stopped there.

"Your holding back." Alice looked at me, she kind of scared me. "There is something you're not telling me and I want to know that too." She was dead serious, she really wanted to know.

I just looked at Alice. I didn´t know what to say. Of course she had some kind of right to know, but not here and not now.

_She had to understand that, didn´t she?_

Of course she didn´t, she had had to put up with all my bullshit for so long. I couldn´t tell her. Not now. Not here. I wasn´t ready.

Selfish yes, did I care. Yes in some ways, but enough to tell her. I stood up and looked at Alice ready to go after I had said what I wanted to say. "Yea there is more to it. its been eight years." I walked a little. I had to get away, but still I had to get this out. "I have all your letters if that helps Alice. Some of them are opened. Some of the first ones, I have read so many times that I know them by heart. I truly have missed you so much, even if you don't believe me." Then I turned around and headed out side. I had to get some fresh air before lunch was over and next class started.

As I hurried to get out, I started to walk faster. I walked past a lot of people, bumped in to some and others tried to talk to me. I didn´t say sorry to the ones I bumped into, I didn´t say anything to the ones that tried to talk to me either. They couldn´t say anything to me that I wanted to hear and if they did judged me on this, well I didn´t care. I needed fresh air or I would just fall apart.

Finally I could see the door that would get me out. I was running now, trying not to think. I should have told Alice something more. I want to have her as a friend again, but how will she ever want that back? Everything she said was true. I had done her wrong in so many ways, even if I had justified it in my head at the time. What I needed was to talk to her alone and not at school.

I saw a bench and sat down, just trying to get a hold on my own thoughts and willing myself not to cry.

I could hear someone come closer to where I was sitting, but I didn´t care. Well so I thought till the person sat down next to me and started to talk.

_I did not want this. I did not need this. I could not do this. Why was this person even talking to me? Why now?_

Could I not get a little break today?


	11. My favorite class

EPOV

I sat in my car listening to music, not even caring about what I was listening to. That had to be a first for me. I always cared what I listened to. It seemed like now all I could hear was how Bella said that she loved someone named Emmett.

_Who the hell was Emmett?_

He´s not her dad and she doesn't have a brother.

Why did I really care, I didn´t know her anymore. She is hot yes but there is something else about her that I can't put my finger on. Something that's just pulls at me.

_What does this Emmett guy have that I don't?_

_She loves this guy? Why? How?_

I'm going to get over this. I will find out who this Emmett guy is. I will get to know Bella again. I will... Well I will get over this and hope I end up with Bella. This Emmett guy has nothing on me. I may not date, but that is by choice. I know I'm good looking. The girls in this town have all more or less had a crush on me. There has to be something about me they all seem to like.

Just as I sat there thinking about it and trying to get my mind around an idea that made since.

_This is so hard!_

I saw Bella coming out of one of the school doors. She had her arms around her just as like Alice had before. It was like she was trying to hold herself together. I did not like that. I wanted to know who had done this to her.

_Why did I care?_

She had seemed so strong today, even when Alice did what she had done. You could see something in her eyes.

So before I could think about it I turned off the music and was on my way over to where Bella had sat down. I noticed that she could tell that I was getting close. I just sat down next to her. I didn´t know what to say, not that that was anything new when it came to things about Bella.

"Hi" I`m just a genius aren´t I.

"Oh hi" Bella looked up at me, her eyes was so sad that I just wanted to hug her.

_How would Alice handle that if she saw it or someone told her what they saw me doing?_

I didn´t get that far because Bella started to talk again. " Alice is looking for you."

"What?" I did not expected that.

"Alice is looking for you." I just looked at her. Her eyes were sad, but still so pretty. "Do I have something in my face?" Bella´s voice was one of the many things that had changed about and that put a smile on my face. Her once very girly voice had become a very sultry voice of a woman.

"You have eyes, a nose and a mouth just to mention some of the things you have on your face." I could hear my own smile in my voice, something that was strange and never happened.

"Ha-Ha! Very funny. You know what I mean." Bella gave me a small smile. Damn what a pretty smile it was too. "Why are you looking at me like that? It's creeping me out."

_I was creeping her out? How did I do that?_

"Creeping you out?" I asked in disbelief. "How in the world am I creeping you out?"

"Easy" Bella laughed "For one you don't like me. Second you look like you care or something. Lastly you hate me. The look that you are giving me right now that´s what´s creeping me out." Her smile faded away as she talked.

_I didn´t like that at all she had a beautiful smile. Why did it fade?_

"Hey, you think I hate you? " Bella just nodded. "I don't, never did."

"Yes you did" she handed me a piece of paper, like that should explain why I would hate her. "Just look at it."

I unfolded the paper. Not really sure what it had to do with anything. Then I got a look at it. It was the letter I wrote to her 6 months after she left. She had it on her, just like that. This put a smile on my lips. Suddenly the warning bell rang but Bella just sat there not moving at all.

"You have this? I mean you have this on you? Just like that?" I said holding the letter.

"Yea, I do. It reminds me of what I have done. Alice just wrote about the good stuff. You wrote everything that I deserved to hear. It kind of keeps me grounded." Bella looked at the ground as she said the last part.

"I didn´t mean it like that. I just got..." I was about to explain myself when Bella stood up and turned away from me.

"I got to get to class. I don't want to be late. Not everyone here knows me like Carl, I mean Mr. Brandon does." Then she started to walk away from me. I couldn´t have that. So I started to walk after her, it didn´t take me long to catch up with her.

"What class do you have?" Bella stopped and just looked at me.

"Bio, you?" she asked back

"The same, I can show you the way since I'm going the same way." I gave her my crooked smile, Tanya once said that it was the best smile I had.

"Oh so if I didn´t have Bio. you wouldn`t have helped me?" She looked at me with those big brown eyes and gave me her best pouty lip. It was so hot, all I wanted to do was to bend down and kiss those lips.

"of course I would." I said without thinking. I heard Bella laugh at that, she shook her head and started to walk again. "Are you laughing at me?" I walked after her, a little slower so I could get a look at her perfect ass.

"Maybe, Maybe not. There is a story behind it though." Bella was still laughing a little.

"Care to tell me?" I wanted to hear why she maybe, maybe not was laughing at me.

"Well Emmett said once" I did not like this, I didn´t want to hear about what the guy she loved had said but she just kept going. "That if I looked at a guy and made a pouty lip or something like that, then he would do what I asked. Of course it doesn´t work on him. He knows me to well at least that´s what he keep telling himself. Between you and me though, he´s doesn't know everything he thinks he does." I could still hear her talking but I wasn't comprehending what she was saying. Her and I, Her and I, just kept playing on a loop in my head. This was something just between her and I. I really liked the sound of that.

She did say Emmett´s name a few more times and I still wondered who he was to her. She talked about him like he was important to her. Not like a boyfriend though.

I guided Bella into class once we reached the door. Mike was there and he was checking Bella out. I walked beside her with my hand on her back. He raised his eyebrows at me, trying to ask me something. I for one didn´t care, I liked how it felt touching Bella. I did not like the way Mike was looking at her.

_She was mine, well not now, but she will be._

I just have to find a way for that to become true. I need to figure out who this Emmett guy was and why she loved him.

"The seat next to me is the only one that´s free." I said to Bella as she started to walk over to Mr. Banner.

I walked to my place and sat down. Mike turned to me asking, "what is that about?" He nodded towards Bella. "You like her?"

I just lifted my shoulders as an answer, he could take that any way he wanted. I really didn´t care.

Bella was done talking to Mr. Banner and was walking to take the seat next to me.

_I think I have a new favorite class._

_She and Alice have to make up?_

This would be so much easier if they were friends again.


	12. Here comes Emmett

BPOV

What a day!

I'm so glad it's finally over.

Things didn´t go exactly as I had hoped, but it hadn´t been all bad either.

Alice and I hadn´t talked as much as I had hoped. After the things that were said in the hall anyway. Things just seemed kind of weird. The weirdness had not stopped there though. Edward and I had talked as well. We not only talked, we were actually getting along.

Something had changed. I am just not sure what exactly. I do think that maybe I like it.

Edward had never been too mean to me. He was the one person that was never afraid to tell me what I had done wrong. Alice would always try to smooth things over but Edward would tell me what I was doing wrong. He never acted like he cared for me either way. Edward just sort of excepted me because Alice and I were friends. That has now changed. Alice and I are not friends anymore but Edward and I actually talked. To my surprise he saved the day for me today.

We had Bio and gym together. He had made me laugh and that was just what I had needed. The only thing I didn´t get was that every time I talked about Emmett he got this weird look in his eyes. He would start to talk about something else right away. A little weird, but I can live with that. It was probably because he just didn't know Emmett yet. It will be better after he has met Emmett, I'm sure of it.

I'm a little clueless as to what to do with the whole Alice thing. I believe the best thing for me to do is tell her everything. I´m however not ready to tell her everything yet. I don't like to be vulnerable or weak and if I tell her, she will see that I´m just that. It's that part I´m not ready for, so that's just out of the question.

I'm so tired right now that it is no use for me to even try and think about it. Hopefully a solution will come to me tomorrow.

I turned out the light but I could hear Emmett coming up the stairs talking to dad. They are really getting along, I love it. I love them both so much that it would be hard if they didn´t get along. I´m so happy that at least this is not a problem.

Tomorrow Emmett is coming to school with me. I am so glad that I won't be alone again.

XxXxXx

The next morning it was raining. Not that I didn't expect it, but a girl can hope can't she?

"Hey you up!" Emmett came barging into my room. I love him, but I hate when he does that. "Oh, goody you're up. Will you make me breakfast?" He gave me his puppy eyes as he said it.

"Don't I always? You know that it's just cereal right, you just have to pour it into a bowl and add some milk."

"I know Bella, but you do it so much better than me." He then turned and walked out of my room.

As I got dressed I couldn´t help but laugh a little at Emmett.

I walked down stairs and just as I took the last step down Emmett was there to drag me to the kitchen.

As I was pouring the cereal, Emmett started to talk.

"It´s so stupid that we only have one class together." I had picked up his schedule yesterday with mine. "Lucky for me it's gym we have together." "Oh, and why is it lucky that we have gym together?" He got this goofy look on his face suddenly then said,

"That way I can scare away all the boys that will be looking at you."

"Yea, because oh so many boys are going to be looking at me." I shook my head as I said it because trust me no one is looking at me.

"You don't see yourself clearly. You should hear what all the guys used to say about you in the locker room when they thought I couldn´t hear." Emmett said before he started to eat.

As Emmett ate, I started to think about what he was telling me.

_What did he mean by that?_

_Was it a good thing?_

_It had to be hadn´t it, Emmett wouldn´t have said it like that if it was bad, would he?_

He can be mean sometimes but he was usually only teasing. No it had to be good, yea.

I looked up at the clock and it was almost time to go. I had to eat fast, since I had forgotten to eat until now.

Emmett had already finished and was heading up stairs to get his backpack.

As I sat there alone I wondered how this day was going to be? Yesterday hadn´t really been like I expected it to be. So today I didn´t expect anything. Alice and I were not friends and we hadn´t been for a long time. I know that it was my fault. I caused all of this by not saying goodbye to her or writing her back.

If I wanted to be friends with her again and I did. I was going to have to be completely honest with her about everything and that was going to take time.

Emmett came down the stairs just as I finished eating. I turned to head up stairs so that I could get my own book bag but it was no use.

I didn't get passed Emmett. He picked me up and he threw me over his shoulder. I squealed in surprise, not that this was the first time but he did always take me by surprise.

Emmett opened the front door then closed it and locked it. I was still on his shoulder trying to get down. Not that I could, like always. Then he started to run to the truck, it was still raining.

He jerked the door open and threw me in before closing the door and running to his side. By now I was laughing, until I remembered that I didn't have my book bag.

When Emmett got himself in, I was done laughing and had now crossed my arms. I was not happy. I was going to have to walk back out there in the rain to get my book bag. Emmett caught onto my mood. "What? I was just having a little fun with you Bella. Why are you so mad?"

I just looked at him, wanting him to figure it out on his own. After a few seconds I knew that he wouldn't figure it out by himself.

"My book bag Emmett, it´s still up stairs in my room. I have to walk back to the house, in the rain to get it."

"Oh. Well how would I know that you didn´t have it with you?"

"How about the fact that you would have seen it if I had it." I was getting fuming now. "You know what? How about you go and get it?" I like the way I think some time.

"Why would I do that..." I did not let Emmett finish that sentence before I started to yell.

"Because it's your fault that I don't have it you big ape!" Emmett started to laugh and that did not help my mood.

"What the F. Are you laughing about? This is not funny!"

"You didn´t let me finish. I was saying, why would I do that when I have your book bag in my backpack. That was what I was going to say." Emmett pulled my book bag out. "By the way Big Ape, was that the best you got Bella? I mean I could do better in my sleep and I know you could too." I blushed at that. I talk in my sleep and he has heard some bad insults come from me when it has happened.

"I know I can do better, but I was angry and that was just the first thing to come out." My mood was getting a little better now. "You know that sometimes I just say the first thing that comes to me when I´m mad. I was just thinking about how much of an ape you were at that moment." Emmett just laughed at me as he started the truck.

It was a quiet ride to school and as we parked Emmett turned to me and smiled.

"So how will this day go?"

"I don't know, I really don't know."


	13. Twisted arm

EPOV

Yesterday had been such a weird day.

Bella is back. The weird part is that I like it. I had dreaded this day for so long but now I was actually happy that she was back. First the way she looked took me by surprise. She is definitely not eight anymore that's for sure. She is so beautiful. Her brown eyes are so deep that when she looks at you it's like she only sees you. They just shine.

Her hair is so much longer then it was when she lived here. It's sort of wavy but the color is a beautiful rich brown. I just want to run my fingers through it to feel if it's as soft as it looks.

Her legs are long and then there is her ass. Well can I just say, it's perfect.

Even with how much Bella has changed in the looks department, it doesn't seem like she has changed who she is or was.

Okay, so maybe she was a little bitchy to Alice. Still I'm going on what Alice said because I wasn't there to hear it for myself.

The thing that has been the weirdest was that Bella and I seemed to be getting along. We joked, laughed and talked. We have been in the same room before for long periods of time and never said more than a couple of words to each other. It seemed every time we did we would end up fighting. Sometimes when we got stuck together we didn't fight, but everybody like us were shocked when it happened.

Things seem different now almost okay even. We talk and laugh, it doesn't appear weird or anything.

"Edward? He must not be here." Rose had spent the night here with Alice and I had surprised them when they entered the kitchen together. I hadn't answered when Alice called my name, I was in my own little Bella world.

"Good morning Alice, Rose." They sat down and started to eat. Alice hadn´t said much to me about the whole Bella thing after we had talked in the car. I think that she had seen or heard about me talking to Bella though. I'm sure that she didn´t like it much. Not that she would hold it against me, but she would maybe wish it was her instead.

She still didn't anything, but I could feel something was off in the way she looked at me. We are twins after all and sometimes the fact that she hasn't said two words to me says a lot about what she is thinking.

"Thinking about Bella?" Rose asked.

"Hum, no. Why would you think that?" I didn´t like this.

"Mike said that you 'guided' Bella in to Bio yesterday. Alice and I saw you two talking and laughing outside at Lunch. I was merely wondering if you were thinking about her, because you had this stupid smile on your face when we walked in."

"Therefore that means I have to be thinking about Bella?" I _was _thinking about her, but I didn´t like the idea of Rose just jumping to that conclusion.

"No it doesn't Edward. Rose just drop it." Alice cut in sensing that Rose and I would not drop it before she stopped us.

"I was just asking" said Rose, trying to act innocent.

"I was just answering" I said back.

When Alice and Rose were done eating we went out to my car and headed for school.

XxXxXxXx

We had to pick up Jasper first. When he entered the car and opened his mouth all hell broke loose.

"Hey Edward. I heard that you tried to get with Bella yesterday?"

"I knew it!" Rose yelled, at the same time that Alice screamed "WHAT?"

"I told..." Rose didn´t get to say anymore because Alice hit her arm and gave her the look.

"You heard what exactly Jasper?" Alice asked. I could hear the anger in her voice.

"Something about Edward liking Bella. Thinking she´s hot and stuff like that." Jasper looked at Alice and then at me. I hadn´t said anything because I didn´t know what to say. I wasn´t going to say if it was true or not. Somehow I had to get out of this without doing either.

_Piece of cake right?_

Alice was looking at me now. I could see that she was waiting for me to answer.

_What to say, what to say._

I was opening and closing my mouth I knew I looked like a fish. Alice just snapped.

"Say something!" She was screaming. "Is it true. Do you like her that way?"

"Why are you angry?" I didn´t know where I was going with that. I was trying to deflect her question.

_Why was she so angry?_

She looked at me and all I could see was anger in her eyes. There was something else there too, hurt and pain. I'm not sure where it was coming from, but it was there.

"I don't know Alice." She was shaking her head. "Bella is mine." Alice was laughing this stupid laugh to herself. It's what she does to hide her emotions.

As soon as I parked the car Jasper and Rose made a quick exit. I was about to get out myself when Alice started to talk.

"I saw you and Bella talking on the benches yesterday. I know it's stupid, but it was suppose to be me and Bella, not you and Bella. Most of my friends I have are because of you and Bella. Even my boyfriend." Alice was crying a little now.

"You know that´s not true Alice. You have your friends because you are a good person. Not because of me and Bella. Bella hasn´t lived here in eight years."

_Where would she get an idea like that from_?

"Jasper loves you. I hate to say that, but it's true. You weren't supposed to have a boyfriend before you are thirty, you know."

"Don't be silly Edward, I know that Jasper loves me. Nevertheless he was your friend first. That is what also brought Rose into my life. She´s the best, but she and I become friends because you and Jasper were friends." She took a deep breath then continued, "Bella was my first friend when we moved here when we were four. She was friends with everybody that lived here and on the res. When I was with Bella everyone just excepted me. Many become my friends after awhile but they were my friends because of her."

"Therefore Bella is yours." I said, understanding my sister and where she was coming from. "She´s changed" was all I said after it had been quiet for awhile.

"I have seen that" Alice turned and looked me in the eyes. "You like the way she looks don't you?" Alice had this little smile on her lips now. I just nodded my head. Alice just shook hers. "Eight years ago I would have been more than happy about it. At this moment I don't like it. I want Bella for myself. However right now she doesn´t even want to talk to me. This is just so screwed up."

I laughed a little at her and said, "Don't worry Alice, I'm not getting Bella. She´s in love with this Emmett guy. So she´s all yours." Not that I really meant that, but what else could I say.

"This Emmett guy has nothing on you. You're as handsome as it gets and you know it. I would rather share her with you then some guy I don't know." Alice giggled a little. "This is stupid isn't it? We are talking about her as if she is a thing we own. Which we do not."

With that we both exited the car and run into the building. As we entered thru the door I could see Bella´s truck parking. There was something weird about that because she was not driving. She was talking to the person who was in the driver seat. It had to be a he because that someone looked too big to be a she. Suddenly Bella opened the door and started running. The other person who I could see now was definitely a guy wasn´t far behind. He caught up with her and threw her up over his shoulder. He was running straight for the door where I was. I backed away and leaned against the wall to watch them.

The guy come thru the door with a laughing Bella over his shoulder. He let her down and she was still laughing. Bella's cheeks were tinted red from all her laughing. The color suited her.

As soon as Bella's feet hit the floor she slipped and started to fall. He grabbed a hold of her before she fell completely on her ass. He just laughed a little while shaking his head.

"Only you Bella, only you." He said as he kissed her cheek. Bella's blush seemed to deepen at that. I got this weird feeling. I Started to walk away just as I heard Bella say, "yea, yea, so you say Em."

_I didn´t like this guy. Was this Emmett?_

_He had laughed at Bella when she slipped. How could he do that to his girlfriend?_

At least he caught her. He also got to kiss her, even if it was on her cheek.

_There is something here that I am not grasping. _

Once again I found myself in my own Bella world wishing it was me that had held her and kissed. Reality was that it was him and not me.

Suddenly someone took a hold of my shoulder. Out of reflex I grabbed a hold of the arm and twisted it. Just as I turned to look at the person who's arm I held, I saw Bella. I was shocked. I just stood there looking at her.

"Are you going to let go of her or do I have to make you?" That did it for me, I let go of her and she just smiled at me.

"I didn´t mean to do that. I´m sorry. Did I hurt you? I´m so, so sorry Bella." She just laughed at me.

"No you didn't hurt me, I'm okay Edward. Em here has done much worse to me." Bella nodded her head to the guy, he just stood there smiling.

_He did worse to her what does that even mean? Is he mean to her or what?_

"Edward I want you to meet Emmett. Emmett this is Edward, Alice´s brother." He put his hand out for me to shake. I took a hold and we both shook hands with a lot more force than was necessary.

"Emmett" I said, he responded with, "Edward."

Just then the warning bell rang.

"So you go down the hall and it's the fourth door on you left." Bella said to Emmett, at least I have Bella in my first period class and not him.

"So who is he?" I asked Bella as we walked to class.

"Um, who?" She asked with her eyebrows pulled together.

"Who? that Emmett guy?" I sounded kind of angry but I couldn't help it.

"Oh, Em. He is the love of my life. I couldn´t believe that he asked if he could come with me to Forks." I just stopped, Bella walked a few more steps before she stopped. When she turned around I could see that she was laughing.

"I´m joking with you. He´s my brother." Then she started to walk again.

"You don't have a brother."

"Well he´s my stepbrother." Her eyes was shining when she talked about him. "He means everything to me and I hope I do to him too. He was there for me when no one else was. When I cut everybody that meant anything to me out of my life he was there. He helped fill a void in my heart." Bella stared at the floor and I was utterly confused.

_Why was he there? Why would you need to cut everybody out of your life? What had happened?_

I wanted to ask, but didn´t.

She looked at me with those big brown eyes and said, "It´s stupid." I watched her bite her lip before she continued, "I´m not ready to tell anyone yet and when I am ready to tell someone I think I have to tell Alice first. She needs to know what really happened."

I just nodded and took my seat in class. Alice entered, looked at Bella and gave her a little smile.

Bella was right, she would need to let Alice know what really happened.

Alice needed to know that Bella wanted to be her friend again, even if Bella hadn´t said it in so many words. I knew that was what she wanted.

I hope that everything will work out. I was warming up to the idea of Emmett all of the sudden. He had helped her, when no one from Forks could.

Even better for me, she was not dating him.


	14. Would I be alone?

BPOV

I have been in Forks of about a month now. It´s good being back here with my dad. I can see now how much I have truly missed him. The only thing I am regretting is that I have not been talking to Alice much. I really miss that. I know that I have to make the first move and tell her what happened, but it´s hard to do that. I don't like thinking about it and talking about it seems worse. Even Emmett and I haven´t talked about it in years. I know that I need to tell Alice and the sooner the better. Alice was always a good friend to me, even now that we are not really friends she deserves to know.

School have been okay. Emmett is doing this over protective 'big brother' thing. He is scaring away all the boys. I´m not kidding when I say that the only boys he likes at school are Jasper and Edward. Well it´s not that he doesn't like the rest of the boys. He just doesn't like them around me. I really careless because right now all I think about is how to tell Alice.

There is also another reason that I don't mind Emmett keeping all the guys away from me and that is Edward. I can't really believe that I am thinking this, but I am falling for him. He´s not like I remembered him at all. I look at the way he cares for his sister and it is beyond anything else. He's kind and funny and the fact that he is totally hot does help a little. When it comes to Edward I sometimes wonder if I ever knew him at all, or maybe I just thought I did?

Well it's too late to do anything about the past now. At least I´m getting to know him now.

The weirdest part about everything is that I have become friends with not just Edward, but Rose and Jasper to. They didn´t live here before so it has been fun getting to know them. Jasper and Rose are twins. Rose is Alice´s best friend and Jaspers is Alice's boyfriend. I do spend a lot of time together with them, and therefore Alice too. We have talked together, but it's always kind of strained when we do.

Jasper and I are friends because Jasper and Emmett become friends.

Rose didn´t like me at all at first, but I think she has a crush on Emmett. She´s trying to become a part of his life. Seeing as how I am the reason that he lives here and if she wants him then she has to except me as well. We are not best of friends by any means, but we have the makings of a friendship. I think and hope for Emmett's sake.

Right now Emmett and I are on our way home from school. We are just picking something up before we head to the Cullen´s home. Emmett has this game that he wants Jasper to try, don't even ask me what it is.

The car drive home is quiet, I can see that Emmett has something to say. He doesn't seem to know how to say whatever it is though. As we get closer to home, I can't take it anymore.

"What Em? I can see it on your face that you have something to say. Out with it."

"You need to talk to Alice." He doesn´t even look at me as he says it, but I can tell that he means it. I don't know what to say to that. I know that he´s right, but what will Alice think when she hears it. It´s kind of lame and I don't know what to say to her quite yet.

"She misses you Bella. She told me." Emmett is now looking at me. "I think that she is waiting for you to take the first step." He stops there, waiting for me to say something. When I don't, he just continues. "It´s not like she doesn't deserve to know. If you had just written something to her, it would have been easier."

"What should I have written Em! What?" I just looked at him. He looked a little shocked and just shook his head. He however didn't give me an answer. "See, you don't know either. So don't try and tell me that this could be any easier. You don't know that."

"But..." I didn't want to hear him so I held my hand up to stop him from going on.

"Don't you think that I know she has the right to be told? I do and I´m going to tell her I just don't know how or what to say." I was totally pissed right now. I turned and looked straight ahead so I didn't have to look at him anymore. We pulled up to the house and Emmett just looked at me before walking in and getting the stupid game.

I had calmed myself down some now and was starting to feel a little guilty for taking it out on Emmett

When he got back into the truck he looked so sad. He started the truck and said, "Sorry"

"Don't be Em, I know your right. I´m just afraid." Emmett was looking at me now out of the corner of his eye.

"What are you afraid of Bella? She won't tell anyone."

"How do you know that Em? I don't even know if she will listen to me, let alone keep what I tell her to herself." I took a deep breath before I whispered "It´s a silly thing for most people you know. What if she laughs at me?"

"She won't Bella. The letters that you have read to me and the ones that I read to you. That is how I know. I can tell that she really cares about you Bella. She knows you so how can you think that she would laugh at you?"

I really hope that Em is right and well a small part of me knows that he is right. There is a bigger part however that just keeps asking, _what if he´s not?_

XxXxXx

"I can't get used to the size of this house." We were at the Cullen´s now. I just smiled at what Emmett said. When I was little everyone used to call it the castle. People would always say how lucky Alice and Edward were to be able to live here.

As we walked to the door Emmett placed his arm over my shoulder.

"Maybe you should try to talk to Alice today?" He whispered to me as we walked in through the door. I just shook his arm off me and sat myself next to Edward so Emmett couldn´t sit next to me. As Emmett took a seat next to Jasper, I crossed my arms and made a point to just look at the TV.

"Is someone in a bad mood?" I heard Jasper ask Emmett.

I couldn´t hear if Emmett answered or not, but I hoped he didn´t.

The guys talked a little and after awhile they put on a video game. At least I had something to watch now but I couldn´t get a grip on what game it was and that was bugging me.

"What are they playing?" I asked Edward, he hadn´t really said much since we got here. Edward just looked at me.

"What?"

"I was just wondering what they are playing?" I laughed a little. "Judging from the way you just acted I don't think you know either."

Edward gave me his crooked smile then said," Yea your right. Sorry."

None of us said anything after that. I watched Emmett for awhile and decided that he was right. I should try and talk to Alice today. Maybe, if Alice was by herself today? Yea then I would try to talk to her.

I sat there thinking about what could happen if I talked to Alice and she didn't understand. I would have to stay away from her. I also would have to stay away from Jasper and Rose, they were Alice´s friends.

Then Edward moved next to me and when I looked at him I bit my lip. I would have to stop talking to Edward too. He was Alice´s brother so my friendship with him would be over and my little crush would also have to come to a stop.

Could I just turn off my feelings like that. I mean without knowing how it could feel if he held me. It had to be different from when Emmett held me.

Before I could think about what I was doing I took a hold of Edward´s hand. I glided slowly closer to him. I was testing to see if this was something Edward didn´t want to do. I was waiting for his rejection except it never came. I decided to become a little braver. Quickly I was sitting right next to him. I placed his arm over my shoulders, still waiting for him to reject me but he never did. I think that he stopped breathing at one point, but I can't be sure. He didn´t relax right away. It however didn't take him that long either.

It was amazing just sitting there with his arm around me like that. It was like it just fit, you know. I felt kind of safe, sort of like it was with Emmett. Then again totally different at the same time.

At the thought of Emmett I looked at him. He had this frown on his face and deep crease lines in his forehead. The creases were turning whitish and that reminded me of something.

_What would Emmett do if things did go bad with Alice?_

_He was really good friends with all of them. Would he chose them over me?_

_No Emmett wouldn´t do that, would he?_

_Would I be all alone after this?_

Well there is only one way to figure that out!

AN

The hole story have been re-posted, nothing big have been changed.

Mostly my English have been fixed and some small errors, all tanks to my Beta.

So I hope you like it.

*SeeS*


	15. Friends or not?

BPOV

I sat there with Edward´s arm around me thinking about how it would be if Alice and I couldn´t be friends.

Well I hope that Emmett would still be around and not choose everyone here over me all the time.

It wasn´t long before Rose came down stairs to join us, which left Alice up stairs alone. _It was now or never_. I asked Edward if Alice´s room was where it was before. He looked a little confused about the question so I just said that I was ready to talk to her. I let Emmett know what I was doing before I walked up stairs to see Alice.

"I´m going up stairs to try and talk to Alice." I whispered to Emmett trying to give him a smile. "Good luck monkey" was all he said. I gave him the keys to the truck before walking to the stairs. I stopped and looked up, not knowing if I could really do this.

"You will be fine. If it goes bad it will be you and me, like always." Emmett gave me a small hug and shoved me towards the stairs. He winked at me saying, "Just come get me when you want to leave."

I hugged Emmett back before he went to finish the game he was playing. So I guess him and I will be 'like always', and that's good. At least for now.

Hopefully this will be the start of something and not the end.

xXxXxX

The walk up to the second floor has never been so long. This was the house I once had called my second home. It looked almost the same. I could see that it was still Esme that was doing all the decorating herself, she was really good at it. There were no more stairs now, all that was left was the few steps to Alice´s door. It was closed. I took a deep breath to try an calm myself down. I started to walk towards the door, and soon I was standing in front of it.

I stared at the door remembering how before I would just walk right in, no questions asked. Now I was kind of afraid to even knock on it. _Well here I go._

I knocked and then the waiting started.

Nothing.

I think a stopped breathing.

After awhile I heard "Come in".

I opened the door really slowly, afraid of how Alice would take that it was me. When the door was fully opened I let out the breathe that I was holding. Alice just looked at me in shock.

"Can we talk?" I asked, not knowing what else to say.

"Oh, so you want to talk? Why is that? Edward, Rose or Jasper aren't good enough anymore? Or what?" Alice was rambling on, and you could hear the anger in her voice.

"What are you talking about Alice? No they are not enough. They never were." Alice just looked at me. "They are just easier. It´s hard talking to you." Alice looked hurt by my words.

"So it's hard to talk to me? If it is so hard then why are you here now?" _That was a good question. Why was I here and why now?_

"I need you Alice." Tears were starting to form in my eyes now. "I want us to be friends. That first day at school was not the place to talk about any of this. It was not the time or place to even cover the letters."

"But you did write to Edward. Edward! What was it that you could say to him and not me? That was what hurt me the most."

"Let me start at the beginning, okay."

I sat down and started to tell her everything.

XxXxXx

_Eight years ago:_

_I came home after a day of playing soccer. My team had won and Edward had been extra pissed, just how I liked it to be. When I walked in the door Dad had asked me to come in to the living room. Something that was strange, we didn't use the living room for much only for watching TV. As I walked in I saw this women sitting there with her back to me. I walked over to dad and he put his arm around me. _

_I could see that the women looked kind of familiar._

_"Bella how nice to see you. What are you wearing? Look how dirty you are. Why?" The women asked. She even sounded familiar to me._

_"I have been playing soccer." I answered and then turned to dad. "We won and Edward was really pissed." Dad smiled at me then turned to the women._

_"Bella, Renee wants you to go with her to Phoenix." Renee as in mom? I looked at the women again and then I could see it. We looked a lot alike, that's why see looked familiar._

_"I have missed you so much Isabella and I want you to come and live with me." she just called me Isabella. I didn´t like that one bit._

_"It´s Bella." _

_I turned to my dad, I was biting my lip now. I didn´t want to go with this women, who would be with my dad then? As I was thinking the doorbell rang. Dad had order pizza so he left to go pay for it._

_As we ate Renee talked and talked about how lovely it was in Phoenix. _

_How could the women that didn´t want me when I was little want me now? She never loved me, she had just left._

_But it would be kind of cool having a mother to. One I could fight with just like Alice and Esme. I would get to see something more than just Forks._

_But she hadn´t loved me when I was little. Could she have changed her mind? Did she love me now? _

_I looked over to dad, he had this distant look in his eyes. It was like he was thinking really hard about something. _

_"The plane leaves in the morning, so we have to leave tonight." Tonight? She couldn´t expect me to make a decision like this now, could she. I didn´t really know her. _

_"You should go Bella, get to know your mom. You and I can talk on the phone all the time." My dad wanted me to go, he wanted me out of his life. He wanted me away from him. It had always been him and me, and now he wanted me to go away from him. _

_"Great its settled than, Bella you are coming with me." Renee was smiling when she said it. I just turned to dad, he didn´t look at me. He just nodded and said, "you can go up and pack some of your stuff. I will come up and help you in a bit." I couldn´t believe it, dad wanted me gone._

_I just walked up to my room and started packing. Dad and Renee were talking down stairs. I closed my door. I didn´t want to hear what they were saying. Renee didn´t want me when I was little, she didn´t love me enough to stay. She just left me, and now she wanted me to come with her. This was so strange. I can't believe that dad wanted me to go with her. He didn´t want me around._

_What had I done for him to not want me around here anymore? Didn´t he love me anymore?_

_And if he didn´t love me, who would love me now? _

XxXx

I tried to explain what had happened the best I could to Alice, the whole time she just sat there not saying a word. This was the hard part. Alice knew me better than anyone, even Emmett. She was the only one I had ever told about how I thought that my mom never loved me. I told her how it was my fault that mom had left my dad. If Alice didn´t understand then no one would.

"How does Emmett fit into all this?" Alice asked. That was one of the easy parts to tell.

"Renee wanted to empress Emmett´s dad or something, that´s why she wanted me to come." I smiled at that. Emmett was the only good thing about all of this. "If it worked or not I don't know, but they are married now."

"So why is Emmett here?"

"Well he knows almost everything that there is to know about me. He is the one that got me through the whole thing with my dad. It took me seven years to really talk to him and hear him out. I love Emmett with all my heart, in a brotherly way. He always helps me, never pushes me to do more than I can handle. When he asked if I wanted him to come with me of course I wanted him to."

_I felt so used by my mother. To this day I have never felt like my mother has ever loved me. I feel more like an accessory to her rather than her daughter. _

Alice just sat there, I didn´t know if she wanted me to stay or leave. So I remained still waiting for her to say anything. I hated just sitting, it was awkward. Her silence was killing me.

After awhile I got tired of waiting so I stood up to leave. Alice looked at me then. You could really see the pain and hurt in her eyes. Everything I saw in her eyes was my fault and I didn´t like that at all.

"Why?" Alice shook her head before continuing, "Why didn´t you write to me? Why Edward?"

"Why did I write to Edward, that´s easy. I didn´t like him. I didn´t want your letters because every time I got a new letter from you I missed you and Dad more. It hurt so bad with every new letter. I would cry for days after I would get one. So when Edward wrote to me telling me what a bad friend I was to you, it was easy to tell him to fuck himself and to never write to me again. But when it came to you, well I didn´t know if it was best to hear from you or not. So I told Edward that I didn´t want you or him to write to me anymore. Not that it helped because you still wrote to me."

I didn´t know what more to say, it was the truth. Alice still just sat there, not saying anything. She was thinking about something.

"So it was easier for you? Did you ever think about how I was feeling?" Alice was standing now and looking down on me. "Well did you?" she yelled. I just shook my head.

"I thought you hated me. I thought that you were mad at me or something. I didn´t know what I had done for you to not tell me. Then I was told that you moved. Moved! And not just down the street, no. You had moved to a another fucking state!" Alice was walking in circles now. "No goodbyes, no letters, no nothing. "

She stopped moving and just looked at me. "I lost my one true friend that day, and when you finally get back you talk to me like I´m nobody. It was like you didn´t even know me." A single tear was running down her cheek. "I was not expecting everything to be the same, but I was at least expecting us to be some kind of friends. But no, you become friends with _Edward._ Your also friends with Rose and even Jasper. My boyfriend! What about me? I missed you the most."

Alice was full out crying now, I was crying a little myself but not as much as her. I had never seen it like that. What was I supposed to do now?

I was about to stand up when Alice did something I didn´t expect at all, she hit me.

"What about me?"

"I don't know Alice. I´m sorry. I thought that my dad didn´t love me. He wanted me to live with my mom who I didn't even know." I was crying hard now. "So yeah I didn´t think about you. Sorry. Afterwards it was to late, I didn´t know what to do or say. But I missed you every single day. I didn´t have my best friend. When I came back and saw you, you had Rose and Jasper. Why would you need me then?"

Alice then did one more thing that I didn´t expect, she hugged me.

"I will always need you Bella. You are my friend. You were my first friend."

We must have been up in Alice´s room for awhile, because Esme came and knocked on the door. "Alice it´s time for dinner. Bella your more than welcome to stay and eat with us, but Emmett is not staying." Esme never entered the room. I didn´t know what I wanted at the time, but if Emmett wasn´t staying then I shouldn´t either.

"No thank you, I'm fine. I will go home with Emmett." Both Alice and I walked out the door together, we didn´t say a word as we walked down the stairs. When we got to the hallway where Emmett and Edward were standing they stopped talking. Alice and I were standing there side by side just looking at the boys but they didn't say a word to us. Alice and I both had red puffy eyes. I let out a long sigh and grabbed my jacket to go.

"It was nice talking to you Alice." Alice smiled a little "Yes it was." She said goodbye to us, then she walked into the kitchen. We said goodbye to Edward and headed home.

_All I could think about on the way home was; how were Alice and I now?_

_Where we good, bad or had nothing changed?_

_Well I guess it´s up to Alice now._

I really hope we are good or at least starting to be.

Because I really, really missed her.


	16. Glad she s back

**CPOV**

I´m sitting here at my friend Billy Black's house. All I can do is stare at my daughter Bella.

I Can't believe that she is back with me again. It still makes my heart hurt to know that she believed I didn't love her. I have never loved any one like I love her and I never will. But boy she has changed, she has always been cute. Now, well let's just say thank god she has Emmett with her. That boy doesn't let anyone get close to Bella and I have to say that I´m happy about that.

When Bella first asked if she could move back home, I was so happy that I just had to tell the _'world'_ about it. Bella asked if her stepbrother could come as well, I didn't really care at all.

All I could think about was that my little girl was coming back to me.

At first I didn't care about him coming because all I was focusing on was Bella coming home. Then I talked to Carlisle. Carlisle brought up the fact that he was only her stepbrother, and that they could be dating. I wanted to go back in time and say that he couldn´t come.

When I was picking them up at the airport and I saw Emmett's arm around Bella. Let's just say that I kind of wanted to rip his arm off and put him on the next plane back to Phoenix.

It didn´t help that Bella had told me that they weren´t dating. Bella was never a good liar, but things change over eight years. When I talked to Bella about it, I couldn´t help but believe her. I could still see my innocent little girl in her eyes.

So now she sit's here just a few feet away from me talking to Jake, Billy´s son.

_My heart fills with joy just watching her laugh and smile. I have missed her so much._

Bella and Jake used to be good friends and hopefully they will be again. Bella kind of cut everyone out of her life when she moved to Phoenix, even Alice her best friend. I don't know why yet, but Bella has her reasons. She always has.

I still can't get that day out of my head. The day when Renee came and wanted to take Bella away from me. I hate that day.

XxXxXx

_Eight years ago:_

_I came home from work tired and Bella wasn´t home yet. Nothing new there. It´s summer and she´s probably out with Alice or playing some sport with some of the boy's. _

_Bella can trip over nothing when she walks, but put her in any sport game and she´s a star. She is always in it to win it, and if Edward is playing on the other team, well watch out. Bella hate´s losing to Edward and Edward hate's losing to Bella. So then it becomes like a war between them. _

_I smile to myself when I think about that. Just as I´m turning on the TV, I hear a knock at the door. I´m supposed to still be at work so I have no idea who it could be. _

_Nothing could have prepared me for what I saw when I opened that door._

_My ex-wife, Bella´s mother, Renee. She was standing on the front porch and I just stood there looking at her._

_Why would she be here? _

_"Hi Charlie, can I come in?" Well I didn´t know what to say so I stepped to the side and let her come in. She walked in and looked around before heading into the kitchen with me following her. I wasn't sure what she was doing here so I just watched her._

_"Well nothing much has changed here I see. Not that I would have expected it too either."_

_"Why are you here Renee?" I was finally over the shock that seeing her put me in._

_"It´s my turn to have her. You have had her for eight years, so well it´s my turn now." I just looked at her not getting what she was talking about. _

_"Isabella, I want Isabella Charlie." And just like that my world crashed in around me. _

_This was the second time in as many minutes that this women had put me in shock. She just stood there smiling like it was nothing. Like MY BELLA was something she could just pack in a suitcase and pull away from her home. _

_"Y..Y..You...W..W..What?" Is all I could get out. _

_"You see I have been thinking for awhile now, that it´s my turn to have Isabella. You have had her all to yourself for a long, long time now. Now I want her. She IS coming to live with me." _

_Her turn, why?_

_I haven´t asked for this?_

_My head was spinning and I had to sit down. This, This, This women that left us by ourselves was standing here demanding to take Bella. *BITCH*_

_But why?_

_Renee kept talking, but I didn't hear her. _

_"Stop Renee, I need a minute here." She just laughed at me. _

_"Well of course you do Charlie." She sat down then and just stared at me still laughing a little. _

_What would I do?_

_What could I do?_

_Why was Renee here now?_

_What would she gain by having Bella with her?_

_What could Bella get out of getting to know Renee?_

_This was just some of the questions spinning around in my head._

_"Why now, Renee?" She gave me one of her winning smiles._

_"Because I miss her, Charlie." Renee looked at me and there was something in her eyes telling me she wasn´t lying, but she was not telling the whole truth either. "You see, I made a hasty decision when I packed up and moved from Forks."_

_Renee had always been the girl for drama effects, so here was the "drama pause". _

_"I didn´t really know what was missing in my life for awhile. Therefore I moved around to try and find the thing that was missing. I never did. A year ago I moved to Phoenix and it all just came to me." yet again a dramatic pause. "Isabella. She was the thing that I was missing."_

_"What do you mean missing Renee? It was you that left us! You left Bella with me...!" Renee stopped me there by holding her hand in front of my face._

_I was mad as hell!_

_"Now I'm taking her with me. That way you can have some alone time Charlie. You deserve it." Renee was smiling from ear to ear._

_"No Renee. I don't need alone time. I don't want alone time. I like having Bella here. She is everything a dad could ask for."_

_You could see that Renee didn´t like that, she hadn´t expected me to want Bella._

_"Well what about dating Charlie? Do you think you could handle that? What about make-up and feminine products? Can you teach her? What about the mother/daughter fights? Can you be the mom?"_

_Where was she going with this?_

_"I can tell her how a girl should act on a date. I can talk to her and explain to her about why her body is changing and what those changes mean. You're a man, therefore it would be weird for her to ask you about those kinds of things. You know nothing about make-up or how a girl should dress. Therefore you can't teach her. Your her dad, you can't take my place as her mom. She will always be your little girl. She will use all the tricks in the book on you and always get her way. I won't let her, because I know about the tricks Charlie."_

_I was thinking a lot about what she said, and well some of what Renee said made sense. When Renee finished speaking I was so lost in my own thoughts that I didn't hear the smug sound in her voice._

_I thought we were doing pretty well all by ourselves if you ask me._

_I didn´t like to think about it, but I had heard Bella talking to Alice about being lucky that she had a mom to fight with._

_Was Bella missing out on something?_

_Something I could never give her?_

_Could Bella hate me when she got older if she didn´t get the choice to pick for herself now?_

_I don't now how long I sat there thinking, before I answered._

_"Only if Bella wants to." Renee had this really smug smile on her lips now, not that I really cared at that moment._

_"So when is Isabella getting home?" _

_"Any minute now." I stood up saying, "I will go and order some pizza for dinner."_

_I did not like this._

_What would I do if Bella did choose to go with Renee?_

_The thought of my daughter moving away from me made my chest ache._

_Bella would not just be moving down the street or to Port Angeles or even Seattle. No she would be moving to another state._

_Could I handle it?_

_I called for the pizza and went back to where Renee was. She talked and talked about everything, but I didn´t hear much of it. My mind was not with me at the moment, it was with Bella._

_What would Bella do?_

_It didn´t take long before Bella ran through the door. I asked if she could come to the living room. Bella's face looked so happy. I could tell that in another home not far from here was a boy who was not so happy._

_Bella walked right up to me and I put my arm around her. I could see that Bella was trying to place who Renee was. _

_After Renee had given Bella a good long look, she started to talk. Renee just couldn´t help herself._

_"Isabella how nice to see you. What are you wearing? Look how dirty you are. Why?" I could see that Renee did not like Bella´s clothes. _

_"I have been playing soccer," Bella said and just shook her head a little like it was the most natural answer ever. Then she turned to me and her eyes lit up. "We won and Edward was really pissed." I laughed a little at this. I could hear Renee suck in a sharp breath at the language Bella had used. I just ignored it because Bella really like to get Edward pissed, not that he is any better._

_I have never been one to beat around the bush so I just went for it. Bella needed to know why her mother was here._

_"Bella, Renee wants you to go with her to Phoenix." Bella looked at me and then to Renee and for once I could not see what Bella was feeling or thinking. So many emotions passed over her face all at the same time._

_"I have missed you so much Isabella and I want you to come live with me." Renee was only looking at Bella now. Bella had this look on her face that I could only interpret as Bella wanted to go. _

_"It´s Bella" was all she said before she turned and looked at me. She looked so torn. She didn´t know what to do. Just as I was about to say something to her the doorbell rang, the pizza was here._

_Once I paid for the pizza I headed to the kitchen. Bella and Renee were about to sit down._

_Renee was talking a lot about Phoenix and how nice it was. Bella was clinging to her every word._

_I did not like this. But if Bella wanted to go, then I would not stop her. She had the right to get to know her own mother. I would not be selfish and make this hard for her. Just when I didn´t think that it could get anymore crazy, it did._

_"The plane leaves in the morning, so we have to leave tonight." Tonight? Renee couldn´t expect Bella to make a decision like this now. This was not fair. I wanted to throw Renee out of the door, and tell her that she could come back in a week or two for Bella´s decision. But the look on Bella´s face when she looked at me told me that she wanted to go. I knew right then that she would go with her mom._

_Bella looked back and forth from me to Renee, not saying anything. After a little while I couldn´t bare the silence. I knew this would be a really hard decision for Bella to make so I gave her what I thought she wanted. It killed me to say it but I was so sure she wanted to go that I apparently wasn't thinking straight. _

_"You should go Bella, get to know your mom. You and I can talk on the phone all the time." I hadn´t more then said the words before I wanted to take them back. I didn´t want my Bella to go. She belonged here with me and everyone that loved her here in Forks. _

_Renee said something and I could feel Bella´s eyes on me, but I couldn´t meet them. If I had I would have taken back every word I had said. So I nodded and told her to go and pack some of her stuff. Bella jumped up from where she sat and was up the stairs in a matter of seconds. _

_"So you will get some alone time now Charlie? It will be good for you." All I wanted right now, was to yell at her. Just to get her to shut up. *BITCH*_

_I could not believe that I had just told Bella to go with her._

_What would I do without Bella here?_

_Who would put a smile on my face?_

_Who would light up my day when it was all gray?_

_Bella my baby, my cute little angel was not going to be with me forever._

XxXxXx

Bella sat herself down in my lap wrapping my arms around her before whispering in my ear, "What are you thinking about?" When I didn´t answer she kept going, "you looked so sad, just now. So what is making you so sad?"

"You are Bella." I didn´t mean to say it like that, it came out wrong. Bella was now trying to stand up. I pulled my arms tighter around her and looked into her eyes and said, "Not like that Bells, never like that." I could feel my eyes stinging and I was holding onto my tears.

"But you said? I don't want to make you sad Dad, not ever." She looked over her shoulder and I think she said something like _'never again at least.'_

"I was just thinking about the day when everything got all twisted. Even though I have you here with me now, soon you will leave again. I can't keep you forever, and that does make me a little sad."

Bella looked up at me and smiled her little shy smile.

"But I´m here now dad and I will always be your little girl." I laughed a little, then Bella turned all serious on me. "I swear I will never ever keep you out of my life again. I´m really sorry I did that Dad. But I ... I..."

I knew this was the hard part for Bella. I can't believe that she ever thought that I didn´t love her. I was not going to push her to say it either, because it made me feel like a loser dad whenever she said it.

"I know, believe me, I know." I hugged her to me, just to prove the her that I really did know. And that I was sorry.

Bella was my sweet, beautiful girl, and she was right.

I would always love her.

I would never ever again do anything that would get her to doubt my love for her.

Bella would always be my little girl.

XxXxXx

**AN:**

Well this was suppose to be a story in Bella and Edward`s POV, but it think this should be here as well. So hate it, love it. tell me about it.

By the way, have you seen eclipse yet?

I have and I absolutely loved it..

*SeeS*


	17. It will be Okay?

BPOV

I´m lying in bed, it´s still Sunday and tomorrow I'm going back to school. This would be the first day that I would be facing Alice since our talk on Friday, the day I told her what happened. I'm not proud of what happened, for just leaving and not keeping in touch or the way I told her what happened. I should have been calmer, I should have written her back, I should have told her how much I missed her. Shoulda, coulda, woulda, but didn't... Well I can't changes the past. Should have, would have and could have are all things I can't do anything with now. I should just lay low and hope that Alice will understand.

I_ hope that she will forgive me_.

_What do I do about Rose, Jasper and Edward?_

It wouldn't be fair to Alice if I remained friends with them. They were all in Alice´s life first. I did not befriend them with the intent to get closer to Alice. I will try and not push my way into her life by using them. I would never try to use them like that. I don't want it to seem that way to Alice.

Alice will have to decide if she wants me in her life.

_I can handle this._

_I need to stay positive._

Alice and I will be friends again.

I have to let it be on her terms. So from now will I not be with Rose, Jasper or Edward. Everything is now up to Alice.

_Goodbye Rose, Goodbye Jasper and Goodbye Edward. _

This is all good to think about, but it will be hard. The hardest part by far will be to stay away from Edward.

I don't know what it is about him, but he is kind of always on my mind. If I didn´t know any better I would say that I´m really, really smitten by him.

_I can't be, can I?_

I used to hate him, how can I then be smitten?

_This is something I will have to think more about later._

I turned around and looked at the wall and tried to get Edward out of my mind. My thoughts drifted to the weekend with dad. It has been a roller coaster of a weekend.

We have been talking a lot about everything. I even filled him in on the whole Alice problem. He was the one that told me that Alice may just need some time without me. It hurt when he said it, but after thinking about it I knew that he might be right.

My mind drifted back to Saturday night at the bonfire.

XxXxXx

_Saturday; _

_I was sitting on my Dads lap and we had been sitting there in silence for awhile when dad started to talk._

_"Are you okay Bells? I mean really? Because everything doesn´t seem to be all okay with you?"_

_"It´s okay dad. I will be more than okay. I just need some time to adjust." I didn´t look at him when I said it._

_"It´s Alice isn´t it?" I just sat there because I didn´t know what to say. He wasn´t that observant. Well he didn´t use to be, or did he? _

_Dad just laughed a little. "I will take that as a yes." he laughed a little more, and well I have to say that I have missed hearing his laugh._

_"Yes, it´s Alice." I didn´t know how to put it into words, to explain it to him. He was patient, letting me think before I spoke. _

_"I didn´t keep in touch with her." I was shaking my head a little. "I know you know that but..." I took a deep breath then continued, "I knew that I just couldn´t come back and everything would be as it was. I´m not that stupid. It just seemed that everything went from bad to worse. I befriended Rosalie, Jasper and Edward." _

_When I said Edward´s name, dad laughed. "You befriended Edward?" Dad was looking at me like I had an extra head now. "Edward Cullen? Alice´s brother? How did that happen?"_

_"Yes, yes and yes. To tell you the truth I don't know how that happened, it just did."_

_Dad had a frown on his face now, he looked to serious. "Are you using him? Because if you are, stop it now right now. No good will ever come of that." Dad was looking me right in the eyes, now I was in shock._

_He thought that I was using Edward, why would I do that?_

_Why would he think that?_

_"You...What?" Using someone was one thing I would never do, that is just cruel. "No dad, no. It's not like that at all. He was the one that started to talk to me. We are also lab partners, it just sort of happened. Why would you think that I was using him Dad?"_

_"Well you and him never got along before. He is Alice´s brother and she´s the one that you would like to be closer to. Many people do use other people in that way. People do it to get close to the one person they want to be friends with most. I hope you never would do that to anyone Bella. Seeing as you and Edward never used to get along it just sort of looked that way."_

_"Do you think others would think that as well?" This was never something I had ever thought about. Could others think I was using Edward to get to Alice? Well I hope not, because that was not the case. _

_"I am sorry to say this Bella, but it was the first thing that popped into my mind. I would guess that others might be thinking that as well." Not what I want to hear, but Dad was never one to cover what he thought. _

_"Can I ask you something else?" Dad asked after I had been quiet for awhile. I just nodded. "If I'm not mistaken Rosalie is Alice´s best friend and Jasper is her boyfriend, right?" Again I just nodded. "So you have become friends with Alice´s best friend, boyfriend and brother." Once again I nodded. "So you have kind of been a part of Alice´s life since you come back. Also you have just told her why you didn´t keep in touch with her. Am I right so far?" It didn't really seem like a question more like a statement he knew the answer to but I told him what he wanted to hear._

_"Yea that´s right dad." _

_"So even if you didn´t mean to force your way in to her life, you did. That is unfair to her, don't you think?" I didn´t say or do anything, so dad just kept going. "I don´t know what's the right thing to do here Bells, but I think you have to step back and let Alice be in charge. From where I stand it looks like she might think that you are taking everyone from her or that you are trying to push your way in to her life, weather she likes it or not. Does that sound fair to you?"_

_Yea that was unfair, but it was not what I was trying to do. Everything was just wrong. I could feel my eyes starting to sting a little. _

_"It´s not what happened dad, I didn´t try to do anything like that all. Everything just happened."_

_"I know Bells, but try and see it from where Alice stands. She might." Dad hugged me tight to him. "I know that she has been missing you, she and I have been talking a lot. You will be friends again, just give it time. She loves you, it´s just hard now. I only know about one that loves and missed you more than her around here."_

_"Yea who would that be?" I asked looking at dad, when he smiled and didn´t answer, well than I felt kind of stupid again. "You" I whispered as I hugged him._

XxXxXx

With that on my mind I closed my eyes and I felt sleep coming over me. It didn´t take long before I drifted off.

I didn´t sleep well that night. I tossed and turned and even wake up several times throughout the night. The last time I woke up I saw that there was only an hour left till my clock was set to wake me, so I just gave up. It was no use in going back to sleep, I knew that I wouldn´t get more sleep anyway. So I just got up and got dressed then walked down stairs and decided to make breakfast for all of us.

Just as I had put the bread in the stove could I hear someone up stairs. I looked at the clock and figured out that it had to be dad. No way on earth was it going to be Emmett. Since dad was up I started to heat up the bacon and some scrambled eggs.

It didn´t take long before dad was in the kitchen.

"Smells good Bells" he said right before he kissed me on the top of my head. Taking his usual seat at the kitchen table, he started to read the paper and I just kept cooking. It didn´t take long before I could feel his eyes on me.

"Did you have trouble sleeping?" I had to give dad some credit. I had always thought that I could get away with everything, but I guess that he could see straight through me. So if I was getting away with something he was probably just letting me. Hum, funny how I thought that my dad didn´t know anything about what was going on. It would seem that I didn't give him enough credit. He knows more than I ever thought he did.

"Yea something like that. I'm kind of worried about seeing Alice today."

"Don't worry about it Bells. Now on to something completely different." Dad took a deep breath "Any food for me?" he wiggled his eyebrows and I had to laugh.

"What do you think? I can't eat all of this food by myself."

Dad laughed a little. "You never know. I mean, you ate more than Jacob at the bonfire." I just shook my head and giggled.

"Bella here can eat more than anyone. She can put me to shame sometimes" Said Emmett as he walked in to the kitchen.

"No I can't!"

He just gave me this look that said, _Oh who do you think you're kidding?_

I just turned around and started to put food on the plates. I set one in front of Dad and one in front of Emmett before I made one for myself.

No one talked as we ate, dad finished first and put his plate in the sink. Then he kissed me on the head and said,

"good luck today Bells. The food was delicious by the way. Emmett you have a good day too." He then headed to the front door.

Emmett swallowed his mouth full of food before saying, "you too Charlie"

"Thanks dad. Bye." We heard a soft bye, before the door closed. Now it was just me and Emmett sitting in the kitchen quietly eating our breakfast.

I concentrate hard on my food and ate really slow. I could feel that my quiet behavior is irritating Emmett. He´s already done and I think that he has something to say to me, but I´m not sure if I want to listen to what it is right now. Emmett and I haven´t talked much this weekend. On Saturday he had already fallen asleep when we come home. Sunday Dad and I were on our way out when Emmett woke up. By the time we come home he had already left with Jasper. When he finally made it home that night I had already gone to bed. I heard Emmett come home, but I ignored him when he knocked on my door. I just pretended to be asleep.

"Are we okay Bella?" Emmett´s voice was kind of unsure.

"What?"

Emmett huffed a few times, and then he took a deep breath before he answered "We haven´t talked the whole weekend, and I have been hanging out with Jasper and the others." I know that he meant Alice when he said the others. "Thing didn´t go as you hoped on Friday, and well I pushed you to do it kind of. I don't want you to be mad at me. I will be there for you, you know that right? I love you Bella, but now I have this feeling that you are mad at me and I don't really know why. So are we okay or not?"

"Yea we are okay Em. I´m not mad at you, it´s just that... " I didn´t know what to do right now. "I just don't know what to do Em. Your friends with them and well I´m going to back away from them for a bit now." Emmett was about to say something but I just shook my head and kept going. "I have been unfair to Alice, Em. I have not given her the choice. I have just pushed myself in to her life again. Therefore I'm going to back off, give her some room. I need to let her take the next step."

"So we are not hanging out with them anymore. Fine." Emmett did not look fine, even if he said fine. This is not what I wanted, not at all. Emmett should not have to choose between me and them.

"No Em. I´m not, you are. I´m not making you choose. Hopefully Alice and I be some kind of friends, but I will be fine even if we aren't. You can do what you want. I love you Em, I really do. So you and I will be fine either way."

"I´m not choosing Bella. It is and will always be you. I love you. However if it´s okay with you that I hang out with them then I will. I just don't want things to be weird between us.

I just nodded my head as I stood up and put our plates in the sink. Emmett went to get our things for school.

We walked to the car in silence. As we took our seats I turned to Emmett and asked,

"So if and I mean _IF_ I had asked you to would you have picked me? I mean I don't want to pressure you but I kind of need to know. If Alice and I don't become friends again that I at least have you." Emmett was looking at me shocked, like I was crazy or something and then I got the feeling that he wouldn´t choose me. I just turned to look out the window, not liking the look on his face.

"Bella, I did choose to come here with you. You are one of the most important people in my life. You are my VIP." He laughed a little. "There is and I mean this, there is no one that can take your place in my life. So yes I would choose you. I thought I made that clear in there." Emmett pointed to the house. "Your my sister, blood or no blood. I don't care. You are my sister."

I just nodded. Knowing that Emmett would choose me made me feel stronger. Maybe and that´s a big maybe, I can get through this day without any big problems.

Telling Alice what happened was the hardest thing I had done until now. Stepping out on Alice again, even if we aren't friends now, seems to be even harder somehow. I needed to do this. I needed to be fair to Alice, if she doesn't want me in her life well than I won't be.

Alice needed to take the next step.

We were in the schools parking lot now. I could see Alice with Jasper and Rose at her car. Guess what, I don't think I'm ready to see her. Emmett parked and turned to me asking, "You okay?"

"Don't know." I laughed a dry laugh."But I´m going to go and find something to do before class. See you at lunch or something?"

"Yeah or something." Emmett pushed me a little and laughed. I turned and was ready to step out of the car, but something held me back. Emmett pulled me in for a hug, before he let go of me he whispered, "It will be okay Bella. I know it will." He went from being totally serious to joking, he could always make me smile or laugh. He finally let me go saying, "look you know that I am right, I have read her letters to you. So don't argue with me about it, because I will win." He gave me a huge smile and I couldn't help but smile back at him.

Then he sat back and made this really goofy face and well, I just had to laugh. I got out of the truck took a deep breath, smoothed my clothes then headed off.

I started to walk toward the school, half way there I turned and looked toward Emmett he was standing and talking with Jasper. But I hadn´t looked at him long before he turned to look at me. He smiled at me and I could see him mouthing, "Are you sure?" I just nodded before I turned around and entered the school.

As I walked to my locker I took my time, not rushing. For once I was alone and didn´t have to rush to class.

So I took my time. This was after all the school I used to dream about going to when I was living here before. The one school I thought I wouldn´t be going to when I moved to Phoenix. This put a genuine smile on my lips as I walked down the hall.

When I reached my locker I could see Jessica one of my old friends from when I used to live here. Jessica and I have talked a little over this past month. I walked toward her, she was talking to Lauren. Neither of them had seen me as I got closer I could hear what they were saying.

"Edward is so affected by her it´s ridicules" I heard Lauren say.

"Yea but he´s not the only one." Jessica replied. Just then Lauren looked up and saw me.

"Hey Bella. How are you?" Lauren said in high pitch fake voice.

"I´m fine how about you?" I smiled. I could see Lauren and Jessica glance at each other, I didn´t quite understand why. Maybe I had interrupted and important conversation or something.

I talked with them until the warning bell rang, then Jessica and Lauren said their goodbyes and walked away. I still had to go to my locker and now I was in a hurry.

Just as I rounded the corner to my locker I saw Alice. Her locker was right next to mine. This might be a problem if I am going to try and avoid Alice completely. Then again it was somewhat of a neutral place. We had to see each other, but we didn´t have to talk or anything.

When I got to my locker Alice was long gone and well now I was really late. Hopefully Mr. Brandon would be in a good mood. I got my stuff and ran to class.

The running part was not a good idea to begin with. As I got closer to the classroom I could see that the door was still open. Mr. Brandon was standing outside talking to someone.

So I kept running. I was pretty close to them. Happy that they hadn´t started class yet. Just as I tried stopping I lost my balance. I was falling so I expected to hit the ground. Then I felt strong arms wrap around me. Someone had caught me mid fall. I looked up and saw Mr. Brandon holding me. I could feel my cheeks getting red. Mr. Brandon set me on my feet and made sure I was not going to fall over then he let go of me.

"Still working on the stopping part of running I see." Mr. Brandon laughed "Or is it still an excuse?" My checks grew even redder now. God I hate Emmett right now. I looked to see who Mr. Brandon had been talking to, and yea it had to be none other than Edward.

Edward had this confused look on his face, he was looking from me to Mr. Brandon, like there was something he was missing.

"Just working on the stopping part Mr. Brandon."

"Good good. Now let's go inside and start class." Edward walked in front of me and Mr. Brandon behind me. "Fallen for any other teacher yet Bella?" Mr. Brandon whispered to me as we walked in the door. My cheeks which had just begun to cool down, flamed with more heat.

As I walked to my desk I tried not to look at Alice, but I failed. When I looked at her it was the first time that she looked like the Alice I remembered. She had the biggest smile on her face. Her smile was genuine and the one she used to give me before I left. I would give anything to keep that smile on her face in hopes of being her friend again.

Hopefully that would happened sooner rather then later.

I looked up at Mr. Brandon and tried to focus on what he was trying to teach us. When his eyes met mine I blushed again. God I hate Emmett, why did he have to tell Carl Brandon that I had a crush on him when I was ten?


	18. Can it be?

EPOV

It was Monday morning and I was excited to get to school. I was up really early. Hum...Both of those were firsts for me. I usually laid in bed until the last minute, then threw on some clothes, ate a quick breakfast then was out the door.

When I got down to the kitchen I saw my mom with a cup of coffee and no Alice. That was another first for me.

As I entered my mom looked up at me and gave me a little smile.

"You're up early, I haven´t even gotten through my first cup of coffee yet." She sighed before she took another sip.

"Is that a hint for me to leave and come back when you're done?" Maybe she wanted some alone time, what do I know? I´m never down this early.

"No it okay Edward stay, but please be quiet." I laughed a little when I took my seat. Knowing my mom she would be the first one to talk and well it didn´t take long before she started.

"So you're up early. What happened? Glad to be going back to school?" Mom asked between sips.

"Yea something like that."

"So does this have something to do with the fact that you haven´t seen Bella since she left on Friday?" When mom asked that I was a little shocked, yes that was one reason. But how would she know that. I´m sure I had to look like a gaping fish.

Mom just laughed. "I will take that as a yes."

She was done with her coffee and had started on breakfast. "A mother can see things you know. It's kind of hard to not notice the way you look at Bella." She turned and winked at me as she said that. She actually winked at me, well I´m sure I was blushing so much that I could compete with Bella right now.

"If I may say something about it." Mom looked at me and I was about to tell her to not say anything, but she smiled at me. I knew she was going to say it either way so I just nodded."You should go for it." I just shook my head. "Why not Edward?"

"Are you seriously asking me why not? I thought that was clear." Mom looked at me puzzled.

"You think she would turn you down?" She frowned. Yes it was that plus the part where Emmett would rip me to pieces. But neither of those was the real reason.

"Alice and Bella aren´t friends. I can't choose Bella over Alice. Blood is much more important." I most have frowned a bit because mom put her thumb between my brows and smoothed out the wrinkles.

"You are not choosing Bella over Alice, and yes blood is important, but it´s not all. You have always put Alice before yourself. Maybe you should do this for you. This could even be good for both Alice and Bella." Mom handed me a plate with some eggs and toast then kept talking. "If Bella likes you as I suspect she does and Alice loves you like I know she does, eventually they would have to talk. And just maybe they will become friends again."

When mom said become friends again, Alice walked in. She seemed happier then she had been since Bella come back.

"Who would become friends?" She asked as she took her place.

"You and Bella." I whispered. Alice just looked at me and then at mom.

"We will see." She said as mom placed a plate in front of her. "Why are you talking about that? That is between me and Bella. She has told me what really happened but she was all weird around me when she come back. Honestly that hurt like hell." Alice looked at me, before she continued, "So when or if we are going to be friends again is between me and Bella."

Neither mom or I said anything else. We both had heard it in her voice that she would be pissed if we were to say anything else about Bella. So just to be sure that Alice wouldn´t be pissed we didn´t say anything at all.

Not long after was I out in my car waiting on Alice. As I sat there my mind drifted off to Bella and Friday.

_Bella had look really pissed as she and Emmett walked in the door, not that Emmett looked happy either but I really didn´t care about that. _

_Bella did take a seat next to me and I for one was happy about that. I felt like I could have done a happy dance right then and there. Except I did a stupid thing, I looked at Emmett and he looked even angrier._

_Jasper and Emmett started to play some video game, Bella asked after a while what they were playing and well I couldn´t answer. Even if she had pointed a gun to my head. And well, I still couldn't tell you what they were playing._

_I was to obsessed with the smell of Bella, she was so close. We sat next to each other in Bio, but not this close. All I really wanted to do was to take her hand in mine. But I could see Emmett and well he wasn´t in a good mood. I didn´t want to piss him of more than he already was. He was playing the video game but I caught him watching me out of the corner of his eyes, more than once._

_Emmett was kind of making me uncomfortable, well that would be an understatement. I know that Bella and him were not an item but even so, he was watching Bella like a hawk. I don't really understand their relationship. I guess he´s kind of like a big brother and an overprotective one at that._

_I could see Bella look around and suddenly move. Then she did something I was not expecting at all. She took my hand really gently in her own. I stopped breathing for a bit. When Bella placed her arm around my neck, I lost all focus. _

_She glided herself closer to me slowly then relaxed her head on my shoulder. _

_It was heaven. _

_It didn´t take long before I relaxed and started breathing again. All I hoped for was that she hadn´t noticed that I had held my breath. This was going to be a long night._

_However my luck didn´t last long. Rosalie came down stairs and that was the end of that. Bella walked upstairs to talk to Alice._

_I could still feel how good it had felt to have my arm around Bella and the warm feeling she gave me. I had never reacted like that with anyone. It was a good feeling but also kind of scary. _

"Are you going to drive or what?" I jumped like hell when Alice started to talk, "I have been sitting here for a little bit now? What were you thinking about? It had to be pretty interesting." I stared up the car without a word and we were off. "Are you blushing? Because it looks like you are a little pink."

"I´m not blushing Alice."

"So what were you thinking about?" I just shook my head, not wanting to answer her. "Oh just say it Edward. Or should I say it for you?"

"I don't know what you're talking about Alice."

"I´m not stupid you know and I know you." Alice turned in her seat to look at me. "Well I know that you are thinking about Bella and you're not telling me because you think that it will hurt me." she shook her head now but kept going, "Bella is hot. I understand you like the way she looks and that's okay."

"It`s more than that." It was out of my mouth before I could even stop it.

"Ha I knew it. You like Bella and don't you even try and deny it." Alice had a big grin on her face. The one she always has when she is right.

"Yea well, I do. Okay." We were getting close to the school now. "I´m not denying it but I am also not doing anything about it."

"Are you stupid?" _What was she going on about now?_ "Why wouldn´t you do anything about it? You and her would be perfect together. You can't not do anything about it Edward. I would hate myself, because even if you're not denying it, I would know that you didn´t do anything because of me."

"What does that have to do with anything Al? It wouldn´t be the first time, now would it. She has hurt you and therefore I´m not doing anything."

_I want to do something but shit this was so hard._

"Stop that right now Edward. Yea you have said no to go on dates with other girls before because they have just used me to get to you. Bella has not done that. Bella has in some ways hurt me more than them, but it wasn´t like it didn´t hurt her as well. She is more hurt by all of this then what I am."

I just looked at Alice. Bella and Alice had talked together about what happened for the first time on Friday. Alice hadn´t told me what happened, but she had cried a lot over the weekend. She had also talked a lot with Emmett since he was the only one except for Bella that knew what had happened.

All I know was that it had something to do with Charlie not loving Bella. Everyone knew that it wasn´t true. There had to be more to it then that. For that to be the only reason seems more to me like just one huge misunderstanding.

Until Bella or someone explains to me the whole story I guess I will remain in the dark.

I pulled in and parked but still had not said anything. I didn´t really know what to say, so I opened my door to get out when Alice stopped me.

"Just don't...Umm... Just do what you want Edward. Don't let me stop you from being happy. Me and Bella will get along somehow and we will be the best of friends we once were." Alice smiled at me, a big smile, the one that hadn´t been on her face in a long time.

I just smiled at her then we both got out of the car.

So maybe I should go for Bella. Mom had told me to and so had Alice.

_What if Bella didn´t like me? I mean she didn't like me eight years ago._

_What if the rumors were true? Was Bella just using me to get closer to Alice?_

_What would Emmett do if I tried to get even closer to Bella?_

_He already kind of hated me, maybe I should take a chance. _

I looked around the parking lot just as Bella´s truck pulled in. It´s Bella´s but she almost never drives it, Emmett does.

Bella and Emmett were sitting in the cab of her truck talking. When she was about to get out, I could see Emmett pull her into a hug. As much as I hate to admit it, I hate the fact that Emmett can do that without thinking. Then again Emmett is one of the things that keeps almost every other boy away from Bella.

Many still think that they are a couple.

I walked toward Mike and some of our others friends.

"Hey dude." Mike said "What were you up to this weekend?"

"Oh nothing much."

Mike and the others kept talking and I tried not to turn and look over to where Bella and Emmett were. I didn´t want to be the one to draw more attention to Bella. I for one didn´t want to hear more about how fine or hot she was, or how they wouldn´t mind to hit that. Cause I really want to hit that someone who says it in the face, and tell them to just keep away from Bella.

I can't do that now can I. because I don't have any claim on her. Yes we are friends and I get the feeling that sometimes she would like me more than a friend. But then for me it becomes all about my sister.

We can talk about almost anything. Although when I try to get a little more from her, like something personal she shuts down. She just locks herself up then quickly changes the subject.

"Bella is walking by herself, no Emmett."Tyler said shocked and pointed in the direction Bella was walking. I turned to look, and he was right. This didn´t happen really often, and if it happened well then I was with her. When I thought about it, Bella never really walked alone.

_Something was up, but what?_

"So are Bella and Emmett dating or what Edward?" Mike asked. "I don't think they are." Mike looked at me when he said that with a smug smile.

"How would I know? I haven´t asked and if they are, isn´t that up to them?" I tried as good as I could to sound like I didn´t care at all.

"They never kiss." someone said

"But they hug all the time." someone else said.

They were discussing things Bella and Emmett did and didn´t do. I just stood there in shock. I couldn´t believe how much they had noticed.

_Of course I knew that Bella and Emmett weren't together but I didn't want to tell them that. _

After the shock had worn off I started to laugh, then everybody stopped talking an looked at me like I was crazy.

"Do you have any idea how girly you all sound?" I asked still laughing and shaking my head. "This is just ... yea I don't even know what to call this. So I´m going now."

I was still laughing as I walked away. I just left them standing there and headed to my first class. Jasper shouted my name and I turned to see him and Emmett walk up to me.

"You're in a good mood. Isn´t this too early for you to be laughing?" Jasper asked, and well he was kind of right.

So I told them about how the guys had gone all girly about Bella walking alone. I also told them how they were discussing what Bella and Emmett were to each other.

When I was done and looked at Emmett I stopped laughing. Once again he looked pissed and well I didn´t know if he was pissed at me or them. Not that I had known what I had done wrong now. I was glad that I left the part out about not telling them that they in fact were not dating.

"God cant they just leave her alone! It´s not like she needs more admirers, she has plenty back home. Fuck I hate this! They should just keep everything to themselves." Emmett looked at me now, "Even you, just stay away from her. She doesn't need this, all she wants is to have some time with her Dad and try to be a friend to Alice. No guys."

I just stood there, not saying anything. Because if I had said anything I knew that Emmett would not have liked it at all.

"Don't you think that the guy thing is up to Bella?" Just what I also wanted to say, thank you Jasper.

Emmett looked shocked as he looked at Jasper. Before he smiled.

"Not before she tells me to back off. Till then I do as I want and I don't want any guys anywhere near Bella. She´s too good for any one here anyway." Emmett smiled smugly as he looked at me. I just nodded, but I didn´t know entirely if Emmett was right. Bella wasn´t all good, she had hurt my sister pretty bad. Bella also used to pull a lot of pranks when we were younger and not all of them were funny. That should proved to him that she is not perfect.

With that I said my goodbyes and walked to class.

When I approached the classroom Mr. Brandon stopped me before I entered, he wanted to talk to me about a paper.

This was Mr. Brandon´s first job after College. So to say that he was fresh air to the old teachers that are working here would be an understatement.

He was interrupted all the time by girls in this class that just had to talk to him. Some just wanted to say hello and some had questions about an assignment. Then there were the ones that wanted to see him after class.

Almost every girl in school looked dreamy at Mr. Brandon. and many of them had a crush on him. They tried to get alone time with him. That is something that never happened though. It was like his #1 rule.

_RULES_

_1.) He was never alone with a girl student._

_2.) Don't be late for class._

_3.) He never let anyone off the hook._

_4.) He always used our last names, with or without the title Miss. or Mr. _

_Mr. Brandon was strict but fair._

He did tell a joke or two, he even smiled sometimes, but not often.

"Mr. Cullen I was just going to talk to you about your last paper." His voice was firm and I did not like the look he was giving me. "Did you copy it from someone?"

"What?" _I had no idea of what he was talking about_. "No, I would never."

"Did you let someone copy yours?"

"No, I have not copied or let someone copy off mine. Why would you think that?" I had never let anyone copy off me, not even Alice and that was saying a lot.

"I have two papers that are almost the same, therefore am I asking." He looked me straight in the eyes.

"How can that be? And why are you asking me and not the two of us together?" I was really curious on that part, wouldn´t that be fair?

"Two reasons. One she has not come to class yet and the second I know that she would not copy any ones paper. She might however let someone copy hers." He smiled a little, like he was remembering something. "She has done that before." The last part he said so low I wasn´t sure if it was meant for me to hear.

I tried to think about who had not shown up to class yet. There were only two girls I could think of that weren't already in the class. One was Alice and the other was Bella.

So that meant that Mr. Brandon was talking about Bella. I had read Alice´s paper and well it was nothing at all like mine.

"So you think I copied Bella's paper?"

"Yes that was what I thought and if you didn´t, then how would you have known that I was talking about Bella´s paper, Mr. Cullen?"

"Easy you said she, therefore a girl. You also said that she wasn´t in the classroom and it missing two girls from the class Alice and Bella. I have read Alice´s paper therefore it´s just left Bella." Just then Alice walked passed us.

"I heard my name, why are you talking about me?" Alice being Alice just had to comment.

"It´s nothing Miss Cullen, go take your seat your brother and I are almost done and the bell will ring any second now." Alice nodded to Mr. Brandon sending me a look that said that _I better tell her what it was about later. _"So your saying that you have not copied Bella's paper and that she has not copied yours right?"

Just as I was about to answer with a _'HELL NO'_ the bell rang and the first thing that hit me was that Bella was not here yet.

"Yes that is what I´m saying. So if they are similar, well that´s just random."

I could see someone running toward us but Mr. Brandon was standing in my way of seeing who it was. He turned to see what I was looking at. Just then the girl lost her balance and was heading for the floor. That is when I noticed it was Bella.

Time seemed to stop for a split second then everything went into slow motion. I was just about to reach for her, however before I could get my hands on her was she in Mr. Brandon´s arms.

Mr. Brandon had a weird look on his face before he had her in his arms. Like he was really worried about her.

He sat Bella down on her feet, but he kept his hands on her longer then he should have. Bella looked up in to Mr. Brandon´s face and blushed.

"Still working on the stopping part of running I see." Mr. Brandon looked at Bella and laughed a little letting her go. "Or is it still an excuse?" Bella´s cheeks grew even redder at that comment.

Bella looked shocked to see me standing behind Mr. Brandon. She hadn´t noticed me before that, and well that pissed me right off. I looked over at Mr. Brandon and he was only looking at Bella. His hands were still kind of lingering towards Bella's waist. He was not touching her but he wasn´t far enough away for my comfort.

I frowned looking back at Bella. Not liking this one bit.

"Just working on the stopping part Mr. Brandon."

"Good good. Now let´s go inside and start class." I walked into the class room. On my way in I could hear Mr. Brandon whisper something to Bella. I can't be a 100% sure, but I think he said something like, "Fallen for any other teacher yet Bella?"

I walk to my desk and my eyes met Alice´s. I know I looked angry, but Alice smiled at me and that softened my anger a little. It's good to see Alice smile like she used too.

I was not paying attention to class. I was pissed off at Mr. Brandon for thinking that I had copied Bella´s paper. Even more pissed off that he didn´t even think that Bella would copy mine. How would he have known that Bella wouldn´t do that.

_Wait didn't he say something about her letting someone else copy her work before. How the hell would he know that?_

As pissed as I was at Mr. Brandon, I was even more pissed off at Bella.

She hadn´t seen me at all. She hadn´t noticed that I was standing right there. She had been too busy looking at Mr. Brandon.

Who would have thought that little Bella Swan was crushing on a teacher?

But even more important, why wasn´t she crushing on _ME_?

Just then the bell rang and class was over.

As we all gathered our stuff Mr. Brandon´s voice broke thru the noise .

"Bella I need to talk to you, so don't go just yet okay."

Bella gave him a weak okay, then sat back down and waited for the class to empty.

I lingered and had a feeling that I had done that before. Then it hit me, I had done it before. On Bella´s first day of school.

_Mr. Brandon had been alone in the classroom with one girl before; BELLA_

_Mr. Brandon had over looked one student coming late to class this last month; BELLA_

_Mr. Brandon always used last names. Not today he said a first name; BELLA_

_He was always strict but fair. Except today. When it had to be me, not Bella that had copied the paper. _

Mr. Brandon had a soft spot for Bella and by the looks of things today she has a little crush on him.

Well shit what could I do with that?

There was no competing with a teacher, was there?

It doesn't really matter though because the fact still remains that no matter how much I want Bella, I just can't have her.

Bella and Alice weren't friends yet. It's just something that I have to learn to live with. I can't try to make Bella swoon over me. As much as I would like too.

The fact that Bella was crushing on a teacher and it looked like he knew it too. This could be very bad. _I am so screwed_. Shit everybody wants a piece of Bella, where does that leave me?

_I just couldn´t win could I?_

_

* * *

_

**AN:**

I just want to thanks Kimmie-LOVE71, she is just amazing and a wonderful Beta.

Also I want to thank you fore reading the story, I would really love to hear what you think about it.

Do you love it or hate it? pleas tell me.

*SeeS*


	19. A Good laugh

BPOV

Let's just say that thing have been a little weird the past two weeks.

Emmett is well, let's just say he is protective to a point where it getting tiring. He's hanging out less and less with Jasper and them. I know that it's because of me, even if he says that it isn't. So we have been hanging out with Carl, Em´s cousin. The famous Mr. Brandon from school.

Jasper and Rosalie are not letting me be alone though. If they aren't with Alice they are bugging me. It's like they know that I'm trying avoid them. In one way is it bugging me, but I'm a little happy about it too.

Alice is about the same, we still aren't talking. She has this look on her face and I know that look. She had it all the time when we were younger. It's like she has some kind of secret she wanted to tell, but couldn't or didn't know how to say it.

But the weirdest one is Edward. He goes from being angry to not having a care in the world in like a second. So I never know what to expect when I see him in class, or even worse outside of class.

One minute he acts like he doesn't know me, then the next acts like we are the best of friends. And then of course there is all the stages in between, hate me, angry at me, smiles at me and so on.

Today has been a hard one, but of course he has been in different moods today. They have all been bad too.

First it was the I don't know you thing, where he doesn´t bother to say hi, moving over to the I hate you stares in class (I know those stares well from when I was younger). He kept those up all day. Let's just move on to Bio., where they just became angry. He even snapped at me for no good reason.

So I guess Edward will always be Edward, he could be a lot like that when we were younger to. It didn´t bother me back then, but know it does. In some ways it hurts a lot too, but yea I can live with it. I have before.

So now it´s time for one more class and then I'm out of here for the weekend.

Today do we have Soccer in gym, and well I´m kind of good at that so I´m looking forward to it. I´m so hoping for a good game, something that will ease my mind and my frustration.

As I walk in to the gym I can hear Emmett´s voice kind of loud and there is a lot of anger in it.

"You don't know anything about her. So just shut up!"

"I did not start this, you did. And as for Bella, I know things that you don't know. Just like you know things I don't know. And it´s not like I said anything that isn´t true." Edward turned around after saying that. He was a little shocked when he saw that I was in fact standing there. "Uhm... Hi". he gave me a shy smile as he said it.

I just started to laugh, I mean right out of the blue, I laughed loud too.

Edward laughed a little too. The rest of the class just stood there looking at us like we were crazy or something.

I didn´t even care why Emmett was angry, or why Edward had said what he had said. And I would never ever hope for a moment without something weird happening, because that was a waist of energy.

I was tired of everything right now all the bullshit was getting to me. I think that I will ask Emmett what it was about when we are home.

The Coach come in and just looked at us, before he divided everyone up into teams.

I was on the opposite team of Edward and Emmett. _This will be so fun._

Emmett was an aggressive player, I knew he wouldn't last five minutes before the coach would put him on the side lines because he couldn´t play "nice". I hoped Edward was playing the spot he used to. Then he has to try and shake me of. _Yeah this is gonna be so fun!_

The game started and I was a little off on my guesses. Emmett lasted more than five minutes, he lasted seven and a half.

But I was right when it come to Edward, and he was having a hard time shaking me off. I wasn't even playing my best.

After fifteen minutes Edward had gotten passed me again and scored his second goal. He walked right up to me saying,

"You suck right now, do you know that." He had this smug face as he continued "I swear you used to be better at this or maybe I have just gotten that much better?" He wiggled his eyebrows and walked away laughing.

See what I mean, his moods are all over the place. And what was up with the wiggling of his eyebrows.

We kept on playing and I decided to start playing my best. Didn´t want to let Edward think he was better than me now, would we?

I had just scored my second goal and tied the game when Coach said that class was over.

This could not be happening, not with a tied game, it was unheard of.

"But it´s tied" both Edward and I said at the same time.

"So?" Coach said like it was nothing.

"It can't be a tied game, one of us have to win." I stated as I pointed between myself and Edward. Edward stood there and nodded.

"Well I see. But class is over and there isn´t much I can do about that, now is there?"

"You could let us play. First goal wins or something!" I wanted to win and I would win; Edward had nothing on me.

"I can't hold class just because you say there can't be a tied game. I heard that you two were competitive with one and other, but this is ridicules. It´s a school game, not the end of the world. Now go shower" Most of the students had started to walk to the showers room.

"I know you can't hold class, but what if we want to continue to play until we have a winner?"

"why is this so important to you Bella?"

"I can't lose to him."I said as I pointed to Edward.

Coach laughed, "You haven´t lost to him. it´s a tied game remember?"

Crap he had me there. "But it´s tied, no one wins or loses then. Someone have to win and someone has to lose."

"Ok. I´m done with this Bella. You can stay and play if you want, but it´s just this once ok?"

"Thank you."

"Okay if you want to play some more before you go home your all welcome to, if you don´t to want to then have a good weekend" he yelled out.

The gym became more empty by the second, Emmett walked up to me.

"How long is this going to take? I want to go home, it´s Friday. I´m not staying late on a Friday."

"I can take her home." Edward said behind me.

"No thanks, I would rather wait for her." Emmett said, a little anger had crept into his voice.

"Don't be silly, if you want to go home go. If Edward is staying he can take me home, there is no reason for you to stay."

"But Bells..."

"No go, have fun with what you are going to do. I will see you later at home." I gave Emmett a hug before I pushed him toward the door of the boys locker room.

Emmett didn´t look to happy about this, but I didn´t care. All I cared about was beating Edward now.

"I guess it´s just you and me then?" Edward said still standing behind me.

I looked around a little before turning. I stumbled backwards, because Edward was standing so close behind me. He grabbed my arms before I started to fall and stabled me on my feet again.

"So first goal wins or what?" I asked looking at Edward and it looked like he was thinking it over.

"Why not play for twenty minutes and start from zero?"

"Smaller goals? Since there aren`t any other players."

"Yea, so it´s set then?"

We shook hands, and fixed the goals then started to play.

Edward got passed me first, but he never really got to shake me of and he missed the goal. We dribbled back and forth between our goals for awhile. Showing off would be the right word, or more trying to show off. Because we stopped each other all the time.

I was the first one to score and well then Edward had a guy moment. Saying that his goal was bigger than mine and stuff like that. So when I scored my second goal he actually went and measured the goals. Here's a surprise for you, my goal was not bigger than his they were the same. So that shut him up.

We kept right on playing. Edward was bigger than me and started to stop me more and more with his body. Not that I'm really complaining, but I really wanted to win.

Edward had scored three goals and I only one more so it was tied yet again and time was once more running out.

I had the ball and was making a run for it. Edward was a little behind me and I was sure that I was going to make that goal. All of the sudden I fell. My legs disappeared and I was on the floor.

_He tackled me._

_I can't believe he tackled me._

_I can't believe that Edward Cullen tackled me like that._

I looked at Edward and it looked like he couldn't believe it either. The look on his face was to funny to be mad at so I started to laugh. My laughing brought Edward out of his shock.

"Are you okay? I really didn't mean to do that." Edward just kept going on and on, which was making it even more funny.

So to just get him to shut up I grab on to one of his legs and pulled it, and just like that he was on the floor next to me.

"Hey! What was that for?" Edward yelled at me.

"You were killing my buzz."

"I could have hurt you."

"Edward shut up or I don't know what I will do to you." I warned, he was really killing my mood.

"What can you do to me?"

"Oh you would be surprised about what I could do to you." As I said it I realized all the things I really wanted to do to him. The one thing that took over my mind was how I really wanted to kiss him. _What, why would I want to kiss him?_

"Your too small to do anything that I would be afraid of." As he said it all the thoughts about kissing him went out the window.

So I jumped on Edwards half sitting up body, and he went down. He was shocked once again. Then I started to tickle him. He was laughing so hard. He tried to get me off of him, but after a bit he understand that he wouldn't get me to stop by doing that. So he started to try and roll us over.

Both of us were full out laughing now, we rolled around on the floor. This was just what the doctor has ordered. A good laugh and some stress relief.

We were out of breath and stopped tickling each other. I was on top at this point and when I realized that, I could feel the blush coming to my cheeks. I rolled off him, but I was still laying on his arm. I was too comfortable to even care right now.

"I'm sorry Bella, I didn't mean to tackle you like that. Are you really okay though?"

"Hey I have lived with Emmett for eight years. Didn't you see how rough he played? It's not like this is the first time I'm been tackled, not even the first time I'm been tackled by you. Remember?"

"Not really, but you weren't as small then?" I laughed again at that "I did not mean like that, I mean... Ummm, what I meant was... God I suck at this." Edward sat up and looked a little embarrassed now.

"I know, but whatever you want to say, I was smaller? I was not a fat child!"

"Yeah I guess you're right. I was really not that tall back then, and well to be honest I didn't see you as I girl back then."

"Oh Edward you really know how to give compliment don't you?" I just shook my head a little" I was bigger when I was little and I wasn't a girl. You really know have to kill a girl's self-esteem, did you know that?"

"You know what I mean Bella" my heart beat a little faster as he said my name.

"Do I really? Because I don't think so."

"You do too"

"do not"

"do so"

"do not"

"do so"

"do not"

"Bella you do so know what I meant"

"do not"

Then Edward lunged at me and started to tickle me. He had both my arms locked so I couldn't fight back. I tried all I could but nothing seemed to work.

"I'm not stopping until you say that you know what I meant." Edward eased up a little, and by the look in his eyes I could tell that he meant what he was saying. I just had to see if it was a bluff.

"Never. I can't tell a lie."

"Oh you so can, you were telling one just now." the he started to tickle me again.

And me being already almost out of breath had to give in.

"Okay... Okay" I said between breaths.

"Okay, what? I want to hear what?"

Edward stopped tickling me now, and I was trying to get me breath back to normal.

"I'm waiting here, and I'm not getting any younger." He poked one finger in my side. "Out with it Swan or I start again, and I'm not stopping until you have said it then."

I did not think Edward was kidding now either, so I took a last breath.

"I can see that you are getting older, and is that I gray hair I see." Okay I know I was pushing it, but I couldn't help myself. He was just too easy.

"If it is a gray hair then I'm I blaming you for it, because it wasn't there before you got back here." Edward was shaking his head now. "Last chance here, did you know what I meant or not?" Edward had this scary look in his eyes and was wiggling his fingers in front of my face.

"I Bella Swan do know what Edward Cullen meant by his comments." Edward leaned down and looked me right in the eyes. I could feel his breath on my face now.

I looked at his lips, was he going to kiss me?

_Did I really want him to kiss me?_

_How would that changes things?_

_And most of all what would that do with the Alice problem?_

One thing I was sure of, yes I wanted him to kiss me.

Edward was so close now, all I had to do would be to lift my head a little.

Just as I was about to, his face turned a little.

His lips was just grazing my ear. He started whispering,

"Now Bella was that so hard to say? " he pulled away from me and sat down at my side.

I took a few long breaths before I sat up. I looked at Edward and he looked like he was deep in thought.

"What's on your mind Edward? Oh and yes, by the way it was hard to say."

Edward looked at me and shook his head. When he focused on my face our eyes locked and I could see the change in his eyes. I wasn't sure what the change was but it was there.

"We are friends right?" I just nodded, as I was frowning a little. Edward smiled before he kept going. "So if I asked you something then you would answer as honest as you could right?" Once again I nodded, wondering what he meant by his question.

His hand went through his hair. He looked kind of nervous, and he wasn't even looking at me.

"Come on Cullen out with it I won't bite." _Too hard anyway_. I laughed a little at my thoughts.

"You might be angry." He smiled but it didn't reach his eyes.

"How about if I promise not to get angry or crazy or anything like that?" Edward's smile got a little bit bigger but he continued shaking his head.

"Okay, but promise that you won't storm off?".

"Yea I promise."

"Why do girls think Mr. Brandon is hot?" he grimaced as he said hot.

"Because he is, have you seen the way he looks? He is also good at his job and not that much older they we are helps a lot, I guess." I smiled as I answered. "But now I have something to ask you, why do you want to know?"

"Uhm... Just wondering really. It's been bugging me lately." Edward looked kind of shy when he said this. "So there isn't really anything particle that makes girls attracted to him?"

"Well this is a small town and he is fresh meat."

"Do you have a crush on him?" Edwards eyes looked like they were about to pop out of his head as he asked this.

"What do you mean?"

"Well it's not like he is the only new meat for you Bella"

"Who told you I had a crush on Mr. Brandon?" I was going to kill Emmett, it had to be him, there was no one other than him that knew that here.

"It's kind of obvious don't you think?"

I shook my head and Edward started telling me all about how obvious it was that I had a crush on Carl Brandon. It was something about how I was always blushing when I looked at him. And he had seen me at the store the last weekend with him and how we had driven off in the same car. There was also something in the way he looked at me. Something that told him that he cared for me. As Edward went on and on I became more and more shocked.

"And then there is the fact that you just said that you had a crush on him." Edward looked down as he said it.

"Yes I said that, I said that I had had crush on him. And by that I meant that I had once, not that I'm crushing on him now.".

Edward looked at me like he didn't believe me. "You have known him for about six weeks."

"No seven..." He didn´t let me finish before he interrupted.

"Oh so seven weeks is that so much longer. Just so you know it's only seven more days." Edward rolled his eyes and I started to laugh.

"Not seven weeks. Years."

"What?" Edward yelled, so there was a little echo in the gym. And all I could do was laugh more.

"Does that explain things to you, now?"

"Well yea kind of. But have? I mean what? Or no I mean how... How do you know him?" Edward looked at me like I had an extra head or something.

"He's Emmett cousin. So I meet him a year after I moved to Phoenix." I smiled. Edward just looked shocked.

"Just give me a moment here." I nodded and Edward closed his eyes and his hand went up to his hair and pulled at it for a bit. God I wanted to pull it with my hands. I bet it just as soft as it looks.

God I have to get a grip on myself, this sexy perfect guy that sits right in front of me is Edward Cullen. How was it that I had a crush on him? I mean, he and I used to kind of hate each other. Then again it hadn't been like this since I got back, he was one of the reasons I liked it here now.

Boy time can kind of mess with your head can't it.

"So you have known Mr. Brandon a long time then? That does kind of explain all the other stuff doesn't it?" Edward really smiled at me now. "So I guess Emmett knows about all of this then?"

Now it was my turn to not understand what Edward was talking about.

"Isn't that clear? I mean he's the one that insisted I meet his cool cousin." I said frowning. "So yea Emmett knows, how couldn't he?"

"It's just something he said." Edward smiled at me.

"Hey kids we are closing here soon, so jump in the showers. I don't want to be here longer then necessary on a Friday." Coach clapped his hand. "Come on now."

Edward jumped up and put his hand out to help me up, I took it and he pulled me up like I was light as air.

"How is it that you could put up a fight with me when you weigh nothing?" Edward said mocking me.

"Oh I don't know, I'm stronger then I look?" I yelled as I ran to the changing room.

"You sure are faster than you look." Edward yelled after me just as the door closed.

It didn´t take long before he knocked on the closed door.

"Uhm, Bella?" what did Edward want now?

"Yes, Edward?" I liked saying his name.

" Do you take long to get ready?"

"No, why?"

"I´m taking you home remember?"

"No I don't remember, give me ten minutes okay?"

Edward laughed. "If you can manage that then your good."

I didn't even bother to answer. I removed my sweaty clothes and walked to the shower.

Hum... Better hurry up, didn't sound like Edward believed me on the time. I will show him.

This has been a great day, hope the weekend will be just as good.

There is something that is bugging me, but for now I will let it pass. I think?

_At least for now._


	20. From good to bad!

EPOV

Finally I was done getting dressed and yes it had taken me a little more than the ten minutes. Bella said she would not be needing ten minutes, but really come on. What girl actually uses that little amount of time. Alice hated gym, not because she doesn't like sports or anything like that. No it because she hates the short time she gets to shower and get ready for her next class.

I put my jacket on and was ready to go.

I pushed the door open or so I thought. It only opened a little before it closed again. I however didn't notice fast enough and I walked right into it.

"Fuck."

"Oh my god." I heard Bella say from the other side of the door. Quickly she threw open the door. She looked so shocked.

"Oh my god. Are you okay?" Bella sounded almost nervous now, not that I can blame her. I have a temper and Bella knew all about that. I never got violent, but I do get mad. "Are you... I mean are you bleeding?"

"No I´m not." I could hear my own voice sounding a little sharper then I hoped it would be.

"I´m.. I´m sorry?" It sounded more like a question. Bella was backing up a little as she said it and she looked sort of scared.

I took a step closer to her and she stopped backing away. I took one more step closer to her and hoped that she wasn't going to keep backing away from me. Bella's eyes opened really wide and I couldn't tell if she was afraid of me or not.

"Stop right there Edward." Her voice was sharp now.

"Why?" I still didn't have my voice under control. And yes I´m a little mad, not at her really. But at the situation and the fact that I could now feel a bump growing on my forehead.

"Because your mad and yes it´s kind of my fault that the door hit you. However It was an accident." Bella took a deep breath then continued with. "And it´s also your fault."

"My fault! How is it my fault?"

"Your late."

I just looked at her.

Is she crazy?

How was it my fault?

"How?"

"If you hadn´t been late, I wouldn´t have had to wait. Thus I wouldn't have had my back leaning on the door waiting for you."

"You're crazy." I laughed shaking my head. And just like that all my anger was forgotten.

"But your still late." Bella smiled a beautiful smile for me before she added with a sigh, "You're not mad any more are you? I hate seeing you mad."

It felt like she was hitting me in the stomach when she said that. I know I have let my anger out on her before, but I have never ever put a finger on her when I was angry or mad. I pulled my hand thru my hair and shifted my eyes down to the floor.

All the sudden Bella touched my forearm, "Hey, what´s wrong?"

"Nothing."

I looked up and met her eyes. Bella just raised her eyebrows in disbelief.

"What?"

"You may be a good liar, but I know your lying. So I ask again, What´s wrong?"

"I don't like that you don't like seeing me angry." I shook my head a little, "does that even make sense? And why don't you like seeing me mad?"

"You have a temper that´s a little scary." I was just about to protest, but Bella silenced me with her finger. "I know that you would never hurt anyone physically when you're angry or mad. Still it´s a little scary anyway. You can say some pretty mean things when your temper takes over."

I just huffed. I couldn't argue the last part of her statement, because it´s true. I have said some really mean stuff to her when we were smaller and called her names. Now I wished that I never had said those things. I kind of hate the fact that I have ever done anything that had hurt her.

"I don't blame you for saying some of the things you said in the past, Edward. Most of what you said was true. The other things that were said or done was only because you are a sore loser." Bella smiled a little. "I, well we both know that if you hadn´t said anything about the way I was acting at the time, well then no one would have. I thank you for that."

I did know what she´s talking about. Most of the time that my temper took over was when Bella had hurt Alice in some way. Not intentionally, but she had. So I would tell her what a lousy friend she was to Alice. Alice would hear it of course and then be angry at me and pull Bella away. It´s not that Bella was a lousy friend but she was always all over the place. And she would sometimes forget things that she had promised Alice.

"I know I was I bad friend to Alice. I truly did really miss her. Well I missed both of you. You're the only one that grounded me. My head was up in the clouds most of the time." Bella smiled at the end of that and I did too. Bella had missed me.

"If you tell anyone this I will deny it, but I kind of missed you to." The words were just flying out of my mouth. I was a little shocked, not only about what I was saying but at how true the words really were. I had missed her, more than I would ever let anyone know. That was why I was so angry about her just leaving like that. Not only did she leave Alice here without telling her why, but she didn´t tell me either.

We started to walk to my car.

For the first time today there seemed to be an awkward silence between us. Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. How could something go from going so great to be so bad. I looked over at Bella and she was chewing on her lip, something she does when she is nervous.

I stopped walking. Bella took a few more steps before she stopped and turned to face me. But she was not looking at me.

"Can we just start over and forget what happened after we walked out of the gym?" I wanted the fun and playful Bella back.

"Why?" Bella raised a brow and looked up at me.

"It got all weird then and I didn't like it." She was shaking her head and had this crooked smile on her face now, like she was up to no good.

"What do you really want me to forget?" Playful Bella was back, or at least her playful voice.

"What do you mean?"

"Do you want me to forget that you were late or that you were missing me?"

"Oh that's so wrong, but I could easily deny both of those. No I want you to forget that I couldn´t even open the door that a little girl like you was leaning on." Bella's eyes went wide and her mouth was opening and closing like a little fish. A cute little fish I might add.

"I didn't mean to do that."

"I know Bella, it was supposed to be a joke. I think it may have been a bad one."

"Oh yea it was a bad one." Bella hit my arm playfully and I played that it hurt. Holding on to the place she had hit me. "Oh your such a baby. Come here and I will make the booboo go away."

She moved my hand from where she had hit me and placed a kiss there instead.

"See all better." she said and started to walk away.

To say that she took me by surprise by kissing my arm would be an understatement. She was almost to the car before she noticed that I was in fact not following her. She turned to look around for me.

"What are you doing back there?" She yelled. I just shook my head and started to walk over to her. As I got closer Bella yelled at me to unlock the car for her, without thinking I pressed the remote to disarm and unlock it. By the time I reached the car she had already taken her seat.

I started to drive towards Bella's place. We didn't talk much, but at least now wasn't it an awkward silence between us. Something I was really happy about.

"You know that I have to ask right?" Bella was not making any sense now.

"Ask about what?"

"You and Emmett. When I got in to the gym you two were arguing about something and that something had something to do with me didn't it?"

This was so stupid, I really did not want to tell her. Yes in some ways it had everything to do with her. However what it really come down to was the fact that Emmett didn't really like me. That fact alone was enough but since I also got along with Bella bugged him. Well that's my guess at least.

"It´s nothing Bella, can't you just forget it?" I knew that she would not, she always has to know. At least she did eight years ago. Maybe I´ll get lucky and that's one of the things she has changed about herself.

Apparently not.

"If you don't tell me, I´m going to ask Emmett. No I´m asking Emmett either way, but I`m asking you first." I look over at Bella fast and from the look she is giving me you can tell that the fact that she´d asking me before Emmett is a big deal.

"I really mean it Bella its nothing."

"So if it's nothing why don't you just tell me." Bella was starting to get irritated now.

"It really had nothing to do with you." I took a quick glance over at her. She was starting to get pissed. Not that I could blame her, I would have been to if it was the other way around.

"Okay say that it´s true and I believe you." There was something in her voice now anger maybe, "But then if it had nothing to do with me, then why was my name mentioned?"

I just shook my head. "I thought you said that you believed me?"

"Oh don't give me that. I´m not asking you what you were arguing about, I´m simply asking why you said my name. That's totally different." Bella had this sly smile on her lips. Like she had won or something.

"It was all about you, but not about you."

"?"

I looked over at Bella just as I took the turn in to her street. She look like she was really trying to make sense of what I was saying.

"Which means?"

"Yes I was talking about you. But it wasn´t really about you. It was kind of a pissing match. Okay?"

This was so embarrassing to say. It is what it is. Emmett doesn't like me and he somehow found out that I had a thing for Bella and well I don't really know how it happened but it did. One minute we were somewhat talking like normal and the next we were arguing about which one of us knows Bella the best. As I think more and more about it, it was something so stupid what are we like 5. Yep this was totally embarrassing.

"A pissing match?" Bella was looking at me, I could feel her eyes burning me. "Like who could piss the longest?"

Without even thinking about it I started to laugh. "In some ways yea."

"So what was it about really? Which one of you that knows me best?" Bella said as she stuck her tongue playfully out at me.

I just nodded. "Now way." Bella almost yelled as I parked my car in front of her house.

I turned to look at her but looked out the window right next to her head instead.

"You know that's kind of cool, except that Emmett is my step-brother." I could see Bella frowning a little even though I wasn't looking directly at her.

"It´s not cool Bella. It´s... it´s... " it´s embarrassing, but I couldn´t say that. That would be even more embarrassing.

"It´s what Edward." Bella had this playful look on her face and you could see in her eyes that she was thinking what I was thinking. I just shook my head. "Come on Edward. Say it. Say what it is." she was mocking me and I couldn´t do anything about it.

"Are you going to say it? Or do I have to say it."

"Don´t okay. We both know what it is, so cant we leave it at that please? Pretty please?" I tried to pout, but it had to look pathetic or something because Bella just started to laugh.

I just straitened up and looked at her, while she was laughing. I hate being laughed at and that had always been one of the problems between me and Bella. She always laughed.

One thing had changed apparently because it didn´t bother me anymore like it used to. However if it had been someone else, then I might have kicked that person out of my car. But not Bella, she looked so cute while she laughed and her laugh was music in my ears. It wasn´t often that Bella laughed at least where I could hear her. I liked it. But when she had laughed for over a minute. I had reached my limit.

"Okay, don't you have anything better to do then laugh at me all day?" My voice is a little hard. Bella tried to stop her laughter just turned into small chuckles.

"I´m sorry, but no not really." Bella looked towards the house before she looked back at me. "You see there´s no cars here." I just kept looking at her, so she kept going. "No cars means that there´s no people home. So I don't really have anything better to do."

We became quiet after that. Just looking around and it was a good quiet. Not the weird and awkward kind.

Suddenly I remembered the winter fair that was in Port Angeles next weekend. I was going and maybe she wanted to come. She used to love that fair.

"So have you heard that the Winter fair is in Port Angeles next weekend?"

"You kidding right? I used to love that." Bella said with excitement in her voice.

"Alice, Rose and Jasper are going, Emmett has not said if he was coming last time I heard. I think he is and I´m going of course. And..."

"Emmett is going? He has heard about it?" She hadn´t let me continue before she jumped in. All of the excitement was gone from her voice and left was a weird voice which I couldn´t really place. Her voice was definitely a little sad now. How that happened I don't know. I wish that whatever it was that I said that I could that it back.

"Emmett is going? With you guys?" Bella wasn´t even looking at me now. "Can you answer me, Edward?"

"Yes I think so, he didn´t say yes right away. I guess Alice has persuaded him by now. " I didn´t know what to expect now. Bella was really having some mood swings. She was really all over the place.

"Oh. Well you guys should have fun." I was just about to talk when I heard her open the door. "So I'm going in now. Thanks for the ride. Bye."

And just like that she was out of the car and walking across the yard.

I was just sitting there dumfounded, watching her walk away. She looked so sad as she stood at the front door looking for her keys.

Why was she so sad now?

What have I done to make her sad?

That was not my intention at all.

I just sat there in my car as she opened the front door and closed it behind her.

I was going to ask her if she wanted to go, but now I didn´t know if that is a good idea or not.

It would have been a perfect first date for us, even if she would have thought about it as a date or not. I know that I would have thought about it like a date. Even as childish or stupid as it was I know that I would have.

But for the most part I only really wanted to spend time with her, just like today. It had been so easy and I know that if we went to the winter fair it would be fun and easy. Even when we were small when we went together it had been easy and the most fun for both of us.

We never had a fight or even had an argument on the day of the fair.

We used to ride rides together, mostly because Alice didn´t want to. But still it was our day. It was kind of like our day of peace, every other day I never knew what to expect from Bella.

So yea the fair would have been a perfect first date.

With that thought I started the car and was on my way home.

As I did drive my thoughts want flying.

Bella and I at the fair, laughing, joking around and eating together. Plain and simple just having fun.

I liked that idea.

But something was bugging me.

Why had Bella reacted that way?

Had I said something wrong?

But the thing that was bugging me the most was;

Could she have known that I was about to ask her?

And If that was the case, why had she reacted that way?

Maybe she didn't want to go with me?

I needed to talk with someone, but who?

* * *

_AN:_

_Sorry for the long wait. _

_I really hope you like the story so fare. _

_And I just have to send a thanks out to all of you that have putt my story as one of there favorites and Alerts._

_I also want to send a tanks to those of you that have reviewed my story, and of course my beta,Kimmie-LOVE71._


	21. Who to talk too?

EPOV

Who could I talk to?

It´s not that I don't have friends that I can talk to, but not about this. This is something I would talk to Jasper about, but then Alice would know and I´m not sure if I want her to know. And that's some kind of a first for me. I never keep things from Alice on purpose. Well kind of never. Then I think about the few things Alice doesn't know and they all have something to do with Bella.

So if I don't want Alice to know, that rules out Rose and Jasper. Not that I would consider Rose, but she would say what's on her mind if I were to speak to her.

Mike and those guys are out of the question because most of them would love to date Bella themselves.

So who am I left with?

Just one person really and the only one that can help me with this.

So I make a u-turn and head back to town. It doesn't take long before I´m parked in front of the house. I look up at it and wonder how was I going to do this?

It´s not like we are that good of friends or that we know each other that well. But what it comes down to is that this is the only person that can answer my questions.

I take deep breath and get out of my car. I can feel the nerves take over more and more as I get closer to the door. It doesn`t take that long before I´m standing in front of the door. I just stand there and stare at that door. I wonder how long I can stand here before I totally lose my nerve and just leave? With that thought in my head I take another deep breath and knock on the door.

I just stand there shifting from one leg to the another. I can't hear anything from the other side, but I´m not really laying my ear to the door to listen either. I knock once more before I just turn to leave, thinking maybe this isn't the best idea I have ever had.

This time I hear a voice saying something like, "yea, yea. I'm coming.." But I´m not 100% sure.

It doesn't take long before the door opens with a, "Charlie isn't here..." She hasn´t seen me yet.

"Good." She looks up at me through her eyelashes. Her brown eyes focus on me and all I want to do is drown in them.

She starts to bite on her lower lip. "Hey" she says releasing me from of the spell of her eyes. She blushes beautifully. Her cheeks turn this majestic pink color.

"What are you doing here?" I don't even get to reply before her forehead wrinkles and she starts talking again. Or more like rambling. "Did you even drive home? I mean you couldn´t have gotten to your place and back? Or could you? No, you couldn´t. So what are you doing here? You haven´t been here the whole time have you?"

I don't think she has even taken a breath yet. It´s like she´s nervous or something. That of course helps me. My nerves have settled a little and almost disappeared completely.

"No... " I couldn´t really remember all her questions and didn´t even know if any of them really were for me. So how could I go on?

"What are you doing here Edward?"

"I need to talk to you." She just looked at me. I started to shift from one leg to the other again as my nerves were getting the best of me. Bella just looked at me and it started to freak me out. "Uhm.. I can go if you don't want to talk to me. I didn´t mean that you had to. It's just that I need to talk to you, but if you don't want to I can just go. I didn´t mean that you had to... It's just... "

Bella took my hand. "It okay, just stop rambling for a sec."

She led me through the door and into the kitchen. "I need to start dinner if that's okay." She looked me right in the eyes as she said it. It was a little humor in the eyes.

"What´s funny?" She started to blush then turned away.

"Nothing really." She said and looked at me over her shoulder as she stuck her tongue out at me.

"Okay now I know your lying. Come on tell me what´s so funny." She started to laugh a little.

"It´s just weird seeing you like that. Your always so picture perfect, so it´s nice to see that you can be nervous also." She shook her head and kept going. "But I can't really for the life of me figure out why your nervous."

"Never?" I just stared at her not believing what she was saying. " I have to have been nervous sometimes. I mean... never?"

Bella just shook her head and started to cut up some vegetables. I had been nervous around her before, I had to hadn´t I? I sat there mulling over what she had said. Her comment about me being picture perfect came to me and I started to smile, at first. But it could be a negative thing too, I mean who wants to be with someone that is perfect?

"Picture Perfect?"

"Yeah, picture perfect." She looked at me biting her lip. "It's not a bad thing Edward."

"Oh no?" I could hear the disbelief in my voice.

"Not really." She said and sat down on the stool next to mine. "I used picture perfect because I know that you have faults just like everyone else, but to someone who doesn't know you they would say that your perfect."

I didn´t know if this was bad or good. It´s not that I didn´t know that I wasn´t perfect, but when it´s said like that I got the feeling that it was really bad.

"Your thinking too much." I was about to protest, but she lifted her hand to signal that I should let her keep going. "Your competitive. Always have been and always will be. You have a temper that can be pretty bad at times. You used to anyway. I don't know if you still do but you used to over think everything or at least a lot of things."

"Yea that doesn't bad at all." I did now know that Bella didn´t have a thing for me. How could she? It´s not that she´s perfect, but you just don't point out the faults of someone if you have ... if you wanted to... well if you wanted to date the other person? If you have feelings for said person, right? Or am I wrong here?

"It´s not. That is just what I see. And what it´s like three things, I mean three really. You have some many more good qualities." she was looking at me, straight in the eyes when she said it.

"Yea three bad things. You didn´t even have to think about them, they just flew right out of your mouth."

"So what Edward that just proves that I know you. You want to know the good things I see in you? Cause I have them to. You're a straight A student. Your protective and caring of Alice and you parents, and well everyone you care for actually. You don't take bullshit from anyone. Your friendly and honest. Your eyes sparkle when you talk about something you're really interested in. You are unbelievably good looking. You know what, I going to stop there and not say anymore because I´m not going to give your ego an even bigger boost than I already did."

I just sat there with my mouth hanging open. Okay the two first was just fact and had nothing to do with my good sides. But really who cares, she thinks I´m good looking? So maybe I have shot with her after all!

"Everybody has good and bad sides Edward. We just have to live with it." she paused a little without looking at me. All I could think about was that Bella thought I was good looking. "But I´m guessing this isn´t what you wanted to talk about."

Right, I was here to fix things, to know that we were good. The problem was that I knew that we were okay now, without having to talk about it. So I didn't really want to say anything about it anymore. I just wanted to know why she was in such a hurry to get away from me earlier and run from the car.

"Uh... Yea that´s, well... it´s not really important now." Bella stood up from her chair and turned her back to me and got back to the vegetables.

"Okay" I could hear it in her voice that she didn´t care, but there was something else in her voice as well.

"It´s just... I mean it´s not important."

"I said it was Okay, so you know your way out right?" She was throwing me out, her voice wasn´t stern. But she hadn´t more than finished saying it before her voice was low and soft, as she said, "I will see you at school?"

"NO!" This was not the way this was ending. No way. Bella turned and was about to say something but I cut her off, "NO. I´m not going not like this. Why do you go all hot and cold all the time? You did it just now and you did it when you got out of the car. Why?"

She just started to laugh. Doing it again, her moods were all over the place. "Do you want to know why?" I just nodded, not really sure what I should say. But one thing I was sure about. I really wanted to know. Or maybe not, not if it had something to do with me or if it was because of me.

Bella stood there looking kind of shy, biting her lip. Her eyes looking everywhere but at me. Then I heard her low voice just little louder than a whisper say, "Guilt."

I just looked at her. That was the last thing I would have guessed. No I would never had guessed that. "Why?"

She lowered her head, "I feel guilty more or less all the time. Sometimes it´s stronger than others. That´s why I go kind of hot and cold as you called it.

"What do you feel guilty about?"

"Are you seriously asking me that?" I nodded. She looked at me with disbelieving eyes. Or was it really written all over her face.

"First there`s that little thing I did with not keeping in touch with Alice. Then I come back and try to play it cool and that just made things worse than they were. After that I somehow ended up becoming friends with Rose and Jasper, who are Alice´s best friend and boyfriend." She huffed and I was about to say something, but she kept going. "And to top everything off and make them just that much worse I become friends with you." She looked right at me as she said it and I would be lying if I said it wasn´t like a hit in the stomach. This was just like a roller coaster. She built up my hope to then take it all away again. Not that I think that she knew she did it but even so, she did.

"I wish I was six years old again." she whispered. I just looked at her asking with my eyes what she meant by it and she answered. "It was much easier to make up and become friends again at that age."

I just nodded and smiled. It sure was, but if we were six she would have hated me. Now she didn´t, and I like that.

I looked up at Bella standing there looking at the floor and twinning the towel she was holding. She looked so unsure of herself. But even now she looked beautiful. Her hair up in a ponytail, some had fallen out, but still she was just lovely.

I stood up and walked over to her. Our shoulders touched and I could feel the sparks all the way down to my toes.

"What did you feel guilty about in the car?" I had to ask, because I really couldn´t see what she could feel guilty about out there.

She started to bite her lower lip again.

"It's silly really, but first I was a little hurt that Emmett was going with you guy. Then I felt guilty for being hurt. I have no right feeling hurt that he has friends here. After all he´s here because I wanted him here, not that I asked him to come. But I didn´t have to, he just knows me that well." she smiled, and I hate to say it, but right now I´m jealous of Emmett. I wish I could put that smile on her face.

"You have the right to feel what you're feeling." Bella still looked at the floor, shaking her head a little. "You are. The thing is, you can always feel what you want. The difference is that you shouldn´t always act on how you feel."

"Like not talking with my Dad for six years?"

It was so low, that I´m not sure she really said it.

"What do you mean, Bella?" I knew that Charlie and Bella hadn´t talked to much over the last eight years. However the fact that they hadn´t talked in six years just seemed weird. Bella and Charlie had the best father- daughter relationship ever.

"That what´s made this whole mess, me not talking to Dad for six years. Well we talked if a Happy Birthday, Merry Christmas or Happy New Year counts as talking." Bella looked at me as she stopped talking. I just shook my head.

"I have to get the lasagna in the oven." Bella turned around and took it from the stove top and put it in the oven.

She turned to me and nodded toward the living-room as she started to walk toward it. I just followed. She took a seat on the couch. I stood a little while thinking about where to sit. I really wanted to take the seat next to Bella, but I didn´t know if that was okay. Bella just looked up at me and patted the cushion next to her. I smiled at her and I got a smile back as I took the seat.

"Why didn´t you talk to Charlie in six years?" Bella didn´t say anything, but she had this crease on her forehead. "That´s a long time. There had to be something to cause it."

Bella took a deep breath before she started to talk.

"I didn´t want to." I was about to say something, but the look Bella gave me made me shut up. "I was afraid that it would hurt me more. I thought Alice would have told you, but I guess not."

"I have heard what people hear think happened, but it´s not true. I didn´t know Renee. I didn´t know that she wanted me to live with her and most of all I never wanted to leave. I didn´t know the women who sat on the couch and wanted me to leave with her to Phoenix."

I just sat there listening to everything Bella said.

This put everything into new light.

I was grateful that Emmett had been there. Hearing how he had always been at her side over the eight years she had lived with her mother. It showed me how much he really cared for her and why she was so close to him.

What to say about Charlie I don't even know. I´m sure he thought he was doing what was best for Bella. But sending her to live with a woman that she didn´t even know, even if this woman was her mother, was just stupid.

When it came to Renee, all I have to say is that I kind of hate her. She just come here and took Bella away from her home. And to make it worse she used Bella to "charm" her way into Emmett´s dad´s life. How he fell for that I will never know.

When Bella was done telling me about why she had left and how Emmett fit into her life I just sat there, not knowing what to say.

Come to think about it Bella had left me with that feeling a lot today.

As we sat there Bella took my hand and started to play with my fingers. I have to say that did not help me think of anything to say to her.

"Do you still play?"

What was she talking about. Did I still play what? I was not following her train of thought. When I hadn't answered her she figured out for herself and gave me the clue I needed. "Piano."

"Yea,"

"Good. You are good at it." I had never played for her. So how would she know that I was any good. "I used to sit outside the music room sometimes when you played. Sometimes I also looked into the room to watch you play. You were always so lost in the music that you never noticed." Bella gave me her soft smile. The one she had smiled when she had thought about Emmett earlier. I just figured out how to keep that smile on her face. Bella would just have to think about something that had to do with me.

But she was wrong about one thing, I always noticed when someone looked at me when I played. The thing was, Esme did it all the time so I had just always thought it was her.

"I would really like to play for you sometime." The words had left my mouth before I had even thought it.

Bella smiled a bright smile at me. "I would love that. "

We just sat there for awhile making small talk. I was trying to man up to ask her about the fair. Because that was the real reason I was here. But I have to say that I had gotten more out of it than I had ever hoped, even if she didn´t want to go with me to the fair.

"About the fair." I started, I could feel Bella stiffen a little. "I was just wondering if you would like to go with me?"

Bella smiled a sad smile up at me, something I really didn´t like. I could see it in her eyes that she would say no and it broke my heart a little.

"No Edward. Your going there with Alice and I have decided that I don't want to force my way into her life. It´s just unfair to her."

"We could go, just you and me. They won't miss me. Jasper and Alice will be to wrapped up in each other."

"Emmett will be following Rose around like a puppy." Bella added, "But wont it be weird? I mean Alice and I aren't really speaking."

"They are a weird match, Rose and Emmett." I said. "And no it won't be weird. Please come with me to the fair."

"Okay" Bella smiled shyly as she answered and I think I just stopped breathing for a bit. Bella Swan had just said yes to go to the fair, the only thing though was that I didn´t know if it was a date or if we were going as friends. I wanted to ask, but chickened out.

The clock on the oven started ringing telling us that the lasagna was done.

Bella walked in to the kitchen and I followed. As Bella opened the oven, the front door opened.

"Bella are you home." Charlie asked as he walked towards the kitchen.

Bella answered and Chief Swan stopped at the door and looked from me to Bella and back again.

"Edward Cullen. Not someone I would ever think I would see in my home." He said with humor in his voice. "Are you staying for Dinner?"

"No, sir. Esme is cocking and I said that I would be home."

I looked at the clock and it was just fifteen minutes before it would be dinner time at home. I said my goodbyes to Bella and Charlie and headed out the front door.

Today had been a good day.

Bella had opened up to me. I had a date with her next weekend.

Well I hoped we had a date, or at least that we would be getting closer to the dating part when we were out next weekend.

As I opened the car door someone touched my arm. Just as I was about to grab it and twist the arm, I remembered when I twisted Bella´s arm at school so I didn´t and as I turned around I was grateful for it.

Bella stood there and looked up at me all nervous. Her big brown eyes on me. I could have drowned in them, but Bella started to talk and I had to listen.

"I was just wondering about something." I nodded for her to continue. "It´s about the fair." I could feel my heart sink. She wanted out, she wanted someone else to come with us. God this couldn´t be good.

"Well we talked about how Alice and Jasper would be all wrapped up in each other and how Emmett would be following Rose around like they were dating. And well I was just wondering." She stood there shifting from one leg to the other. She took a deep breath and the words she said were so fast that I had to ask her to please repeat that. "I said I was wondering if this is a date?"

I let out the breath I had been holding, without even knowing I had held it.

"Yea." I rubbed my neck, "I was kind of hoping that." I was about to say more but Bella cut me off.

"Good." She smiled nervously, "I can't wait. See you on Monday at school."

I really wanted to kiss her or hug her or something, but I couldn´t. Not here, not now.

We just stood there looking at each other smiling these goofy smiles.

We both jumped as Charlie yelled from the front door. "The food is getting cold."

We said goodbye once more and I watched Bella walk in side before I drove home.

One thing I was sure of. This had been a good day, and nothing could ruin it for me now.


	22. Different but good, right?

EPOV

When I got home I could smell the dinner and it smelled so good. Just as the lasagna Bella had made. I should really have clarified that I hadn´t told Esme that I would be home for dinner, when the Chief asked if I wanted to stay. But then again, maybe it was a good thing. I had spent a lot of time with Bella today and we had ended it on a really good note. We had confirmed that the fair would be a date and Bella had smiled, really smiled. I was really happy that she had come after me to ask if it was a date.

She had shocked me by telling me about all the guilt she carried on her shoulders. Yeah she may have some guilt when it comes to Alice, but when it come to Emmett no way. He had come to her by himself and it was like she was acting on it. She may have been a little disappointed that he was going with "us", but she wouldn´t have acted on it. That I was sure about.

As I walked in to the living room I could see Alice sitting on the couch. She sat in a place she hadn't sat in, in years. She had her feet pulled up with her arms around them and was resting her head on her knees. It was like a step back for her.

I hated seeing her like that. I knew what she was thinking about, or should I say who?

She used to sit like that a lot. It was like she would try and get a feeling about why Bella left. Like sitting like Bella always used to would get her inside Bella´s head.

But it was a long time since I had seen her sit like that. I think the last time she had been like that was when I had gotten the letter from Bella. Then she would be sitting like that whenever she was home. I don't know if she felt closer to her like that or like I said before, maybe she was trying to get in to Bella´s head that way.

Her head tilted a little to the side so she could see me.

"I don`t know what is with me." Alice turned her head back. "I had a little fight with Jasper just now. I don't think he´s happy with me you know."

Jasper and Alice never fight, so this was serious. I just walked over to her and put my arm over the back of the couch, not knowing if Alice wanted to be hugged or not.

"I haven´t seen you sit like this in a few years. Well I haven´t seen you sit on that spot since the letter thing." She didn´t say anything at all, she looked so small. "I hate seeing you like this."

"Well you used to hate the person that made me feel the need to sit here to. Thing's change though right?" Alice had an edge to her voice as she said it.

I didn´t know what to say to that. Yeah things changes, but it didn´t have to be a bad thing. I like this change. I could also see why Alice wouldn´t like it, at least not right now.

"Jasper thinks I´m being stupid. That it´s just me that is pushing Bella away now." She was whispering and it was hard to hear what she was saying. "He thinks I´m hurting both me and Bella by not talking to her. He said it was like I am doing it to get back at her."

"She wishes she was six years old again." I didn´t know why I said it, but I just had this feeling that Alice would know what Bella had meant by it. I looked over at Alice and could see her smile a little.

"Much easier to make up." she said. "Just say truce and it´s over."

We just sat there a not saying a thing. I didn´t want to say anything, not knowing how to tread here.

"You were happy when you walked in. I could hear it in your walk." She shifted a little over to me and put her head on my shoulder and I put my arm around her. "Sorry for killing your buzz."

"I have a date." I whispered to her.

"The fair, right?" I just nodded and Alice beamed at me. "It´s a perfect first date for the two of you. You two always did get along at the fair. I can even remember a time when you two dumped me to ride something together even when I wanted to ride it. That was the last time we were together at the fair, all three of us."

I Just sat there and thought back to that day.

XxXxXx

_We was walking over to one of the rides. It was the second year it was here Alice had refused to go up in it. So I had been stuck riding it with Isabella. We had talked a lot about that ride after words and we were both looking forward to riding it again this year. Alice was tagging along behind us as Isabella and I hurried to get in the line. As we walked in to the line and were talking about how fun it would be. I noticed Alice looking up at it and just standing there. She looked it up and down and up again._

_"I want to ride it." Alice said after awhile. Both Isabella and I just turned to look at her. We didn't say a thing before we turned to look at each other and shook our heads no. "Bella will you sit with me?" Alice asked._

_I had kind of looking forward to taking this ride with Isabella this year. I knew that I would take it alone and Alice would ride with Isabella. So to say that what happened next surprised me would be an understatement._

_"No, I already promised Edward to ride with him." Isabella´s voice was really low and I was sure I had heard wrong until I looked over at Alice. She looked more shocked than I felt._

_"But you always ride with me when I ride." Alice finally managed to get out._

_"I´m sorry Alice, but I promised."_

_"Yeah she really did." I said and Alice was eying both of us._

XxXxXx

As I looked back at it, much had changed that year between me and Bella. I was still calling her Isabella, but I had started to slip a Bella out now and then. Bella being the smart ass she was even then had always pointed it out whenever I did.

The thought about little Bella´s big smile and how she always said something like, "was that so hard" whenever I called her Bella. I would argue back saying it was and then she would stick her tongue out at me before she marched away.

I could feel my smile growing at that thought.

"That was a weird year. Things kind of changed between you and Bella a little that year. Well at least until she moved." Alice lifted her head off my shoulder. "I miss her. I really do."

"She´s right here Alice and she misses you too."

Mum stuck her head out from the kitchen door. "The Food is ready, we are just waiting for your father." and then she was gone.

"Why did she move Edward and why didn´t she write?" Alice's voice was so sad now.

"You know why. She told you." I looked over at Alice and I could see the question in her eyes, so I answered it. "She told me about it today. I wish Renee had just kept away. Then it would be different."

"But maybe not the same at all." What did she mean by that. Of course it wouldn´t be the same. That was the point. I wouldn´t be sitting here with a sad Alice.

"Maybe I wouldn´t have Jasper. Maybe you wouldn´t see Bella in a new way. And Emmett wouldn´t have been here. I think Rose and Emmett would be a good couple." We looked at each other. "So maybe there is a reason for all of this."

"But I also wish that. Or at least that things were different, maybe if Bella had just listened to Charlie or written to me things would have been different in a good way." We both sat there thinking it over. That would probably have been the best, but how are we to say that things would be better or worse either way.

"She´s pulling away from me again, I can feel it you know." Alice looked up at me. "She doesn't come over to us when school starts. She doesn't eat with us at lunch anymore and I know it´s because of me."

"Yeah she is." Alice was standing on her feet looking at me now.

"What? Why? I know I haven´t been welcoming her back with open arms, but that´s not just my fault. She has some blame in that too." She was pacing in front of me now, mumbling to herself.

She had been doing that for a little while, before I stood up and stopped her.

"Bella feels like she has been pushing herself on you. She feels that it´s not fair to you." I stopped a little to see if Alice was getting any of this and I could see that she was so I kept going. "She didn´t mean to become friends with Jasper or Rose, or me for that matter. It just kind of happened."

"So what it comes down to is that she is backing off from your boyfriend and best-friend." I could see that Alice was about to protest. "Her words not mine. She is backing away in hope that you will come around."

As that was said we could hear a car pulling up and then mom come in to the living room.

"That´s your dad, so get ready to eat." Alice and I walked over to the wash our hands, neither of us saying anything.

As we were about to go into the dining room Alice stopped me.

"I just don't know what to do when it comes to her. I wish I could go up to her and give her a big hug and than we would go back to how things were before." Alice looked up at me before she continued. "I thought I could do that, but when I saw her I just froze. I wish I could blame it on the fact that she acted like I wasn´t someone to her. But that was not the problem, I just wasn´t ready to see her."

With that she walked in and took her place at the table.

I just stood there, Alice had given me something to think about. Jasper and I both had thought that it was the whole Bella acting like she didn't know Alice. It was as her first day of school when she asked about the office.

However if that wasn´t the case than how would we get to the bottom of this?

I walked in to the dining room and took my seat across from Alice. As we eat dad talked about have much more paper work he seemed to be doing from one week to the next. I kept glancing over at Alice. She was deep in thought. Not noticing anything around her. She was in her own little world right now. It was like she was trying to figure out something complicated. Mom noticed to that Alice was distracted. Mom had these soft eyes when she looked at her, like she knew what was going on in that little head of hers.

It didn´t take long before dad asked about my day, I told him about Bella and my soccer game. Well not how it ended, but about the part where we stayed behind to see who would win.

Mom made a comment about how I had just came home from school. Just as I was about to try and explain why I was so late to him. Alice stood up, "Sorry. I have to go. I forgot about something." and with that she was out of the room. Not long after we heard the front door opened then close.

I started paying close attention to my food, knowing that both mom and dad´s eyes would soon be on me, full of unanswered questions. Questions I didn´t have the answers to. They would expect me to I come up with something I would think she was doing. But right now I had no clue about what was going on. So I stayed focused on my food, hoping for the best. I hope they would understand that I didn´t know anything.

"What´s up with Alice today?" Dad asked, I just kept looking down. Not saying anything. Hopefully mom would answer.

"I don´t know, she has been a little down since she came home from school today." I could feel moms eyes staring at me now. "She was up in her room for a long time, then she come down and asked if Edward was home."

I closed my eyes knowing that I had lost this round. I knew what would come out of dads mouth next. I wished that I had stayed at Bella´s place and had dinner with her and the Chief. None of this would have happened then.

"Where were you Edward? Alice always knows where you are." I looked up at two curious faces.

"I was at school. It was me and a few others that wanted to finish a round of soccer after gym." It was half true. Hoping that they wouldn´t ask more but knowing that one of them would. Dad nodded and started to eat again. Mom just kept looking.

"Who won?"

That was a good question. Did I win or Bella? I didn´t know. Was it still a tie or had one of us won?

"It had to be a long game. You did just get home 30 minutes before your dad."

Yeah I knew it was coming.

"We hang out a little after. But what does this have to do with Alice?" Please let them bite. I don't want this to be the time to tell them about Bella. It´s not that I don't want to tell them about my date with Bella. I just want it to be my thing for a little while longer. Just mine and Bella´s.

"How did Alice get home from school if you were at school?" Dad looked up at me.

"Emmett drove her home." Mom answered and just as she answered him she got this big smile on her face. A smile I didn't like. It was telling me that she just now figured it out. "Emmett has gym at the sometime you do, doesn't he?" I just nodded, not knowing were this was going. "And so does Bella right?" This was not good. Not good at all, but I nodded again.

"So Bella was left, but not Emmett?" Oh no. This was why she was smiling. "Did Chief Swan smile when he come home?"

What kind of question is that?

I looked my mom in the eyes and couldn't say anything. We just stared at each other before a huge smile broke out on her face.

"Alice is over at the Swan house"

How could she get all of that from so little?

It´s not like I said something, and even if I did what did that to do with Alice?

* * *

AN:

I hope you like it.

I will try and get updates out more often, but things have been so crazy latetly that I haven´t had the time. Hopefully will thing go back to normal now, and I will have more time to write. I really hope I didn´t jinxed it know.

But thanks fore reading this story and I have to sand a big thanks to my Beat fore helping me whit my English, so Thanks Kimmie-LOVE71.

Siw


	23. ShoeBox

_AN: This was a difficult chapter to wright. Alice are suppose to be this happy girl and I have made her all sad, so it kind of hard finding her. I have two different takes on this, but this won so I really hope you like it. _

APOV

I just had to get out of there. Hearing Edward tell dad about his day, knowing he had been hanging out with Bella made it hard to breath. It wasn´t that Edward said Bella´s name or anything, because he didn´t. It was the fact that it was him hanging out with her and not me. Yeah, yeah, yeah I know how that sounds.

But the thing is or was that it was always me and Bella. Bella is the only thing I didn´t have to share with him. He did not like her and Bella thought he was too serious all the time. So she took it upon herself to have extra fun trying to win him over when he took a game to serious. She laughed every time he got frustrated. However her favorite thing to do was sticking her tongue out at him. He always thought that was just childish, even when we were five. But she thought it was fun.

I sat in the car looking up at the Swan house. I have been sitting out here in front of it for almost half an hour now. I did not know what I was doing here, or what I had hoped to find when I got here. I could see Charlie´s car in the drive way. But there wasn´t a lot of lights on in the house.

Never have I ever just sat like this outside of their house. Not even after Bella left. I had always been welcome here. Charlie had kept me up to date on how thing had been with Bella, well about the things he knew at least. But there was so much more to things then what parents know.

The hardest thing with Bella not writing me back, was the fact that she had written back to Edward. That was the worst thing. Way had she done it? But things got worse. When she came back she acted like she didn't really know me. Bella though did not act that way towards Edward. Why was he so different?

He had always been there, he was just as much part of her life her in Forks as I was. Bella had been MY best friend, NOT Edwards. They were not even close to what you would call friends. They just tolerated each other because of me.

So what now? Were they dating in spite of me? Or were the stupid rumors true? Was she using Edward?

All these question with no answers were just that, question with still no answers.

My head started to hurt. God I have to say I agree with Bella, I wish I was six again. Then all of this wouldn´t have mattered. So if it hadn´t mattered then, why did it now?

Oh God more questions. I need to stop. My head was pounding. I don't need more questions. I need answers.

Just then there was a knock on my window and I jumped grabbing my chest over my heart. Looking up I looked right in to Bella´s eyes. She looked so unsure of herself as she stood looking back at me. She was biting her lip and toying with the arms of her sweater.

I moved to me to roll the window down. As I did you could see that she was getting more and more unsure of herself. "Do you want to talk?" Her voice was low and I had trouble hearing her.

I just shrugged. I did want to talk to her, but I didn´t know if I wanted to hear what she had to say. I was scared of what her answers to my questions might be. "Do you want to come in?" she looked down. "If you're hungry I have some lasagna left. "I smiled and nodded. I was hungry and was even starting to get a little cold. I rolled up the window and got out of the car locking it before following Bella into the house. As she opened the door I could hear Charlie´s voice. "Oh there you are Bella. I´m heading over to the Black´s do you want to come with?" Charlie looked up and smiled when he saw me. "I was wondering when I would be seeing you here again." then he looked at Bella, "So I guess that´s a no for you on going with me then." Bella just smiled a little to him and Charlie turned back to me as he was walking towards the door. "It good seeing you Alice. Say hi to your parents for me." but as he was about to close the door he said, "Oh I forgot, you don't have to Edward is supposed to do it." then he said his goodbyes an closed the door.

I just looked at Bella, she looked down. "Edward was here when Charlie got home from work." I just nodded since I already knew that. Bella led the way to the living room. Bella was about to sit down but jumped up and said that she would be right back as she walked out of the room. I just took a seat on the couch. Looking around the room, it looked different but still the same. I looked around trying to figure out what was different. As Bella came back into the room I could see what was different. She was what made it different. She was back and in some way the whole house was more alive because of it. Bella placed a plate in front of me. As I looked down the smell of lasagna hit me and my stomach growled. A little laugh left Bella, but as I looked up at her she got quiet.

I took a bite of it and it tasted just wonderful. "Is it hot enough?" Bella asked and I nodded. Bella was biting her lower lip again. "You know about me and Edward don't you?" Once again I just nodded, because my mouth was full of the wonderful food. She huffed and walked out of the room again. It didn´t take long before she was back holding two bottles of water and a shoe-box. She placed one of the bottles in front of me and took a seat.

We just sat there in total silence as I ate. As I was finishing my plate Bella asked if I wanted some more. I just shook my head no because I was so stuffed and swallowed my last bite.

"So where is Emmett?" I asked. Bella looked around, and shrugged, "I would have said with you guys, but your here so I guess he´s with Jasper or something." I just nodded. Thinking about the argument Jasper and I had.

_He had said that I was cold towards Bella and that he missed me. When I said that I was here. He had said that it was just a shell of me that was there. And that what he missed was the fun loving Alice, not the cold one sitting in front of him. That´s when I had started to cry a little. That was when Jasper had been a total jerk and said that it was nice that I could show some kind of emotion. Because it was awhile since he had seen me show any. _

Bella looked at the shoe-box like she was thinking about something.

"When we was talking last time you asked why I hadn´t been writing you back." Bella huffed and started to bit her lip again. "I kind of have." My eyes shot up to look at her. _What did she mean_? She looked at the shoe-box again like it had the answers. She took a deep breath and handed it to me. "This is my response to your letters and some I have written without you even sending one first. It´s a lot of letters from the first weeks. You were kind of my dairy." She looked down before she continued, "I am sorry that I never did send them. I was afraid of what you would write back to me. Then I read through them and I felt stupid so I didn´t send them. But I couldn´t just throw them away. "

I just looked at her for a little. "So what has changed? Why are you giving them to me now?"

Bella looked up at me, "Nothing has changed, but I think you have a right to read _your _letters." she put emesis the "your" part. "And I´m giving them to you now, because I don´t know how to explain things to you. So maybe the letters will."

I opened the box and looked at all the letters. I looked at some of the envelopes. Most of them had my address on them, some even had stamps on them. I looked up at Bella. She smiled a little before she talked. "I got close to sending some of them."

"I wish you had." I looked down at the letters and up at her. "So how come you couldn´t send me a letter, but you could send Edward one?"

"I have wondered about that a lot myself. The only answer I have is that I was kind of mad at Edward when I sent him the letter." she looked down at her hands, "I didn´t like the way Edward painted me in the letter. It wasn´t like I didn´t all ready know that I was a lousy friend or that you deserved better from your best friend. He hit a nerve and I just had to tell him that he didn´t even know why I left. So from the time I read his letter and got angry, so angry that I wrote back right then it only took about two hours before I had already sent a letter back to him. It was so weird and I did kind of regret it the day after."

I just nodded. Wondering how to phrase my next question.

"Why are you... why are you going on a date with Edward?"

Bella looked my right in the eyes, "I like your brother a lot. I don´t know what´s changed, but I like it. That´s one of the few changes I like." I could see that she was telling the truth. "He makes me feel safe and when I´m with him I have a hard time breathing, but it´s kind of worse when I´m away from him. So I don´t know what to do?" She looked down on her hands as she continued. "So please don´t ask me not to go on the date. I will not go if you ask me not to go. So therefore I am asking you to not ask me to do that. "

"I won't ask that of you. Edward would hate me if I asked that of you." Bella looked up at me as fast as I said it.

"I would never tell him that you asked that. I would never do anything to make Edward hate you or anything like that. And besides that, he would never hate you. No one and nothing can make him hate you. You know that." Bella´s eye´s were really serious now.

I looked back at her, "I would never ask that either way Bella. You would get hurt." She smiled a little. "But did you know that what you said to me is things you should know too." Bella looked at me puzzled. "That Charlie would always love you. What made you ever doubt that?"

Bella pulled her legs up. "I know that now." she smiled a little sad smile. "But you know how I felt about everything Alice. I had always thought that me and my dad would always be together. Then suddenly he tells me that I should go with this women that was my mom. The same woman he knew didn´t really want me. All I could get out of that was that he wanted to get rid of me."

I looked up at Bella she had tears in her eyes. The weird thing was that I could see where she was coming from. It had always been a sore spot to Bella that her mom wasn´t in her life and that Renee hadn´t wanted her. I didn´t know where Bella had heard it from, but we had all heard that. So in some context it had to be the truth. But how could she believe that about Charlie? They had the best father/daughter relationship ever.

"But you and Charlie had... " Bella cut me off. "Edward asked the same thing. I don't know. My mind just saw it like that. I Don't know why or how or anything like that it just happened that way." Bella was shaking her head now.

I know that a lot of this was covered the first time we talked, but I was angry and didn´t really hear her. Thing has changed since than. I wanted Bella back as my friend. Not just a friend that is dating my brother but My friend. A friend that I could talk to and share things with.

Not really knowing how to make that happen. I said the one thing that I needed a friend to talk about. Not just someone, but MY friend.

"Jasper and I had a fight." I looked over at Bella she just looked shocked.

"What do you mean?" Bella looked so worried. "Did he hurt you?"

I smiled a little, knowing that Jasper would never hurt. "No. He would never hurt me." Bella just nodded. "But it´s kind of your fault we did fight." It was kind of a joke, but it wasn´t really funny and Bella was just sitting there not knowing what to say.

So I told her how the fight with Jasper had been. How he said I was acting like a bitch and how he meant I had changed and wasn´t being myself. When I told her about how Jasper said it I had started to cry, she looked kind of angry. I was glad that Jasper wasn´t here. Bella may be little, but if she wants to harm you she´s strong enough to do it. At least she was, and I would think that she still is. After all she has been living with Emmett.

She sat there and after a bit her face did fall a little. I had been done telling her about the fight and Bella had still not said anything.

"So that´s why your here isn´t it." Her smile was so forced that nothing could look more fake.

"What do you mean?"

"Your here because of Jasper. You're doing it to make up with him." Bella´s voice was low, just a whisper.

"Yea in some ways, but that´s not the only reason." I looked up at Bella. "I want us to work things out. I want to have you as a friend Bella, but I don't know how to get us there. I want... I want us to be as we used to." There, I finally said it. I looked at Bella and it looked like she was tasting my words or something. Then something weird happened. Bella tackled me in to the couch in a big hug. Bella had never been much of a hugger. She had no problem being hugged, but she always had a bit of a problem being the one starting the hug.

"I have missed you so much Alice and I know that you will have some trouble with trusting me again. I promise I will somehow show you that I can be trusted and that we can be friends again." Bella was talking a mile a minute and she said a lot more, but this was the only thing I could really hear.

Bella did let go of me and looked me in the eyes. "I hope you will read the letters, so you can see that I´m not lying. I have missed you so much. There is so much in the letters that I don't really know how to say and yea there is so much I want to tell you. I just don't know how or where to start. Please say that you will read them."

I just nodded.

I knew that I would read them. I needed to read them. I could finally get to see some of what had been going on in her little head.

The front door got kicked open and both me and Bella jumped up.

"Bella. Bella. BELLA!" Emmett´s voice carried thru the air as he got closer to the living room. Bella got up and almost run out of the living room to Emmett. "I GOT A CAR." he yelled. Bella jumped up in to Emmett´s arms and he spun her around. "We have to go to Port Angels on Wednesday. Dad´s has made a deal with some shop."

Emmett stopped and put Bella down when he looked up and saw me. His eyes immediately went to the shoe-box.

"Hi Alice, what have you got there?" He pointed at the shoe-box, but was looking at Bella. I just shrugged as I said, "Something I got from Bella." Emmett didn´t say anything, but kept eying the box. I got the vibe that he knew what was in it and that he didn´t like the fact that I had it.

He was silent for the first time since I meet him. It was an awkward silence when he was around. It was like he didn´t like the situation. It had something to do with me getting the shoe-box he didn´t like. But I don't know what.

Bella was biting her lip, but there was a little smile playing on her lips. Like she wasn´t touched by the awkwardness. Emmett walked over to her and put an arm around her, all protective and you could feel the love he had for her as he did it. I was 100% sure that it was just brotherly love he felt for her. You could see it in his eyes. He wanted no harm to come to her, all he wanted was for her to be happy. The one thing that gave it a way was that he had no lust in his eyes when he looked at her. I have to say that I´m happy that Bella has Emmett in her life. I in some way was jealous and wishing that there had never been any use for him. The wish that everything would have been different, but with that wish also comes the fear that everything would be completely different.

"I better get going." I said looking over at Bella. She smiled a little sad smile, like she was sad that I was going but she nodded. "Bye Bella, Bye Emmett." I looked over at Emmett as I said bye to him and saw that his eyes were still on the box. He didn´t even take the eyes of the box as he said bye to me.

Bella wiggled away from Emmett, walked over to me and opened the door for me. "Bye Alice." She paused like she wanted to say something, but didn´t. So I walked out. I looked at her once more before I started on the two steps down the porch.

"Alice" I heard Bella say behind me. "I did really miss you and I really hope that you will read the letters.". I just smiled and nodded as I walked to my car.

I sat the shoe-box in the passenger seat and started the car to head home.

As I entered the house I walked right past Edward and his eyes full of questions. I didn´t have time for him. Not now. Not when I finally had some of the answers I have been looking for. Not now that I had some of Bella´s thoughts with me in the shoe-box under my arm.

Hopefully these will give me some of the answers to at least some of my questions.

I am forever hopeful. But maybe forever ends here?

* * *

_AN: tell me what you think. _


	24. What a day

BPOV

I could feel Emmett´s eyes on me as soon as Alice left. I had seen the way he had looked at the box and I could feel that he didn´t like this at all. But I didn´t understand it. Emmett had pushed me to talk to Alice, tell her what´s been going on, so why he was eying the shoe-box the way he was. It did not make any sense at all to me. So I just turned and walked in to the living room to clean up after myself and Alice.

"Are you sure you should have given her that box?" Em´s voice hold nothing but concern. I just nodded. I was as sure as I would ever be. "Well I think you should have waited." A little anger had sneaked its way into his voice. Turning I looked at him in disbelief. I said he had been pushing. Not as much lately as in the beginning but still pushing.

"Oh don't look at me like that Bells."

"Like what Em?"

"Like you think I´m crazy."

A humorless laugh escaped me. "But right now you are crazy Em. You have been pushing me to talk to her since we have been back." I took a deep breath before I kept going. "And even before that you were pushing me to send those letters to her. It is her box. All the letters in that box have her name on it and not because she sent them, but because I wrote them to her. I chickened out when it came time to send them." I could feel my eyes sting a little, mostly because I was counting on Emmett´s support and now he was all weird.

"I just think that you two should talk Bells. You two have changed over the years, both of you." This was so un-Emmett as it could ever be. The seriousness in his voice and all of it. I just sank down on the couch and Emmett took a seat next to me. "You have been writing those letters to the Alice for years. Giving her those letters when you haven´t been speaking, might not have been a good idea Bells. That´s all I`m saying."

He put his arm around me and I put my head on his shoulder as I whispered, "But it can't hurt. If we talk to much we just end up shouting at one an another. Not much help in that now is there." Emmett just squeezed my shoulder a little. "I just don't know what to do Em."

We sat there for a long time not saying anything. All I could think about was that Alice may or may not read those letters. Letters that was never sent letters that could have made things different if I just had had the balls to send them when I should. Letters that were full of stupid stuff. Letters that were full of my secrets, dream and fears. Hopefully this does not blow up in my face.

XxXxXxXx

_The day of the move._

_Dad had just sent me up to my room to pack, because he didn´t want me any longer and the worst part was that I didn´t know what I did wrong. I hadn´t gotten in any fights lately. I had been home when I was supposed to. I hadn´t done anything wrong, so why was Dad sending me to Renee. She had left me, she didn´t care. She didn´t know me. The tears were falling from my eyes and I didn´t know how to stop them. With leaving I would also lose all of my friends, I would lose Alice. Alice that had shared everything with me, even her own mother. Esme was all I could ever dream of in a mom, Renee would never be like that. Not that I even knew Renee, but I could feel it. Her hug had told me that. Esme´s hugs were warm, Renee´s hug was cold. It was as if she was scared I could ruin her clothes or something._

_What would I do without Alice. She was the only one that really knew me. So I sat down and found a pen and the pink paper she had given me to my last birthday. And wrote:_

_Dear Alice._

_My Mom is here and she is taken me to Phoenix. I don't really know why or what I did wrong to dad. He said I should go. Like he didn't want me here anymore. So I´m leaving._

_So I can't play with you tomorrow even if I did promise. I´m sorry. I will miss you_

_Bella._

_I folded that paper together just as dad walked in the door with a suitcase._

_XxXxXxXx_

I had been meaning to give that letter to dad, so that he could have given it to Alice. But everything happened so quickly and soon was I sitting in Renee´s car and was on my way out of Fork´s. The letter was still in my pocket. I had cried a lot and begged Renee to turn around so I could give dad the letter when I remembered it, but Renee said we didn´t have the time and that we would post it when we reached Port Angeles. Something that never happened.

I took a deep breath and let it out slow. Emmett then asked,

"So did you or Edward win the game?"

"I don't know" the words left my mouth before I could even think about it. I could feel Emmett holding back a laugh because his shoulder was shaking. "What´s so funny?"

"How far away were you just now? Because you always know who won, and you were so into winning today that you really should know who it was that won." Emmett laughed out loud as he said it. "So I just figured you just answered without thinking."

"No Emmett I really don't know. I think it ended with a tie, but I´m not sure. It´s kind of fussy really." I laughed as I remember how shocked Edward had looked after he had tackled me and how he had looked even more shocked when he ended up on the floor next to me. Emmett poked me in the side.

"What´s so funny?"

"Oh nothing I was just thinking about something." I stood up and was half way to the kitchen when Emmett put his hand on my shoulder.

"Are we keeping secrets from each other now?" Emmett said and I could hear that he was a little unsure of himself. I just looked up at him, shaking my head of course we wasn´t. He knew that right. "Are you sure Bella, because you and I aren´t like we used to be."

"Emmett..." that was all I got to say before he turned his back to me and walked to the stairs. I ran to the kitchen and placed the plate that Alice had eaten from then ran after him up stairs. I ran into his room and looked for him, but he wasn´t there. I knocked on the bathroom door before I entered but he wasn´t there either. I started to wonder if he had just walked up a few steps and when I was in the kitchen he had gone out. So a started to walk down stairs, but as I got half way down I saw my car keys on the dresser. Knowing Emmett, I knew he would have taken them with him if he had gone out. So he had to be here some place, but where?

Then I heard a noise from upstairs, and it sounded as if it came from my room. I walked upstairs and in to my room, and there on my bed he was. He was looking up at the roof as I walked in. He knew I was there, but didn´t move at all. I walked over to my desk and took a seat on the chair.

"I´m not the only one not telling stuff Emmett. You have secrets to." He hadn´t told me about the fair and that had kind of hurt. I didn´t really have any secrets that he didn´t know. Except the date with Edward, but I hadn´t had the time to tell him about it. I was going to tell him about it. Really I was. I just didn´t know how, or when. I hadn´t told him that I liked Edward that way, but then again he hadn´t told me he liked Rosalie either.

"But I´m not the one pushing you away." Emmett huffed. "Fuck. I came here because of you and lately the only thing you do is push me away. We never talk. And when I came home today Alice is here. I didn´t even know you two were talking." There was a little anger in his voice, but what was really irritating me was that he still wasn´t looking at me.

"I didn´t ask YOU to come with me. YOU asked me to come, remember?" I was really putting presser on the word you, because it was he that had asked. I had wanted to ask him, but I hadn´t.

Emmett sat up in my bed and turned to look at me, I could see the hurt in his eyes. "Yeah... your right." he was shaking his head. "I wanted to come because I didn´t want to lose you as my best friend and sister. I didn´t want to lose the one person that knew how I felt about the things with my mom. It´s not only you that came from a messed up family remember. So I´m sorry if me being here is wrong for you."

He was about to stand up, and he was really hurt. "Em..."I took a deep breath and Emmett laid down on my bed again.

"I didn´t think you would push me away when I moved here with you. You know. I knew I had to share you, but not lose you." He was looking at the selling again.

"You aren´t losing me. You're stuck with me." I said not really knowing what to say. Once it was out there and I heard how lame it sounded I just shook my head. Emmett put one of his hands out for me to hold. As I took it he pulled me to him, not so hard that I was falling over, but hard enough for me to have to stand so that I wouldn´t fall. As I stood he pulled once more and I walked closer and laid down next to him.

"You sure of that?" he said as he pulled me closer.

"Yeah. I´m sure."

"Good. Because I´m not sure who I would talk to if you weren't here. I know your messed up and you know I´m messed up, so we are alike. We don't have to explain much." I laughed a little. We just laid there not saying a thing to each other. After a little while I turned over to the side so I could see Emmett´s face. I started to bite my lip just as Emmett looked over to me.

"Just say it, whatever it is that you want to say."

"Do you remember the fair I always used to talk about?" Emmett nodded and as he did he looked away, just like he couldn´t look at me now. "Relax I already know that you are going with Alice and Jasper, oh and don't forget Rose." I laughed a little and to my surprise it looked like he was blushing a little. "Why didn´t you tell me?"

Emmett didn´t say anything at first. "Why didn´t you tell me that you and Alice are talking?"

"Why didn´t you tell me you like Rose?"

"Why didn´t you tell me... fuck I don't know. I don't like this game." we both laughed at that.

"It´s not a game and if it was it was you that started it. So are you going to answer me?"

"I don't really know. I didn´t know how to tell you. I... well, I... Fuck. I just couldn´t say no when I was asked by Rose. I didn´t know how to. But when I thought of telling you I didn´t know how to so that either at least without hurting you." Emmett huffed and looked at me. "I so wanted to go with you, but when Rose asked I just said yes without thinking. She was so happy and was going on and on about it, so I didn´t have the heart to tell her that I couldn´t go with them when I remembered you."

"So you just forgot about me, just like that?" I said trying to make a joke out of it, but it did kind of hurt.

"Bella not like that. I just didn´t remember how you used to go on and on about that fair before. It was a little while later that it dawned on me." Emmett shook his head. "God I sound like such a jerk right now."

"Not really. I know what you mean, but I have to say that it did sting a little when I heard that you were going with them and hadn´t told me."

"But you know that you can come with us right?" Emmett´s voice was so sincere when he said it. I knew that he would make it work if I had wanted to go with them. "But who told you that I was going with them?"

Okay here goes nothing. I know he won't like what I am going to say, so I am just going to say it fast. He didn´t like Edward, so I he wouldn´t like that fact that he was the one that told me. Emmett also was not going to like the fact that I was going to the fair with Edward on a date.

"WellEdwardtoldme." I said in one quick breath. Emmett jumped out of the bed like it had bit him in the ass or something.

"What? Why would he tell you that? He had no right? What could he ever gain by telling you that?" Emmett was walking around in circles as he was rambling on and on.

"Hey Em." He stopped and looked at me like he had forgotten that I was still in the same room as him. "He thought that I knew." Emmett looked at me like I had two heads. "He just started talking about the fair then it just sort of popped out, he really thought that I already knew."

"Oh" was all Emmett sat down beside me.

"I´m going to the fair with him."

"With Edward? No. No you're not." Emmett had a firm voice as he said it, like he thought that he had a say in it. That pissed me right off. Who did he think he was talking to? He could do like he wanted, but I couldn´t. Hell. NO.

"Yeah I am."

"Didn´t you hear what I said Bella. You're not going with him."

"Do you really think you have a say in it?" Emmett nodded. "No you don't Em. And what is really the difference? If I was going with you and the other like you said Edward would still be there. You will be all wrapped up in Rose, and we all know that Alice will be all wrapped up with Jasper. All that is left then is Edward."

"But now he is going to think it is a date." Emmett said.

"Yea, because it is."

"You don't date." The words were out of Emmett´s mouth before I had finished saying my sentence.

I just looked at him in disbelief. Was he crazy? I could date if I wanted to. I had just never wanted to. And all of the people in the world he couldn´t say anything. The only other person that had any say in that was Edward, and well maybe dad and Edward´s parents.

"I can date who ever I want." Emmett just looked at me as he said, "Except Edward."

I just snorted. "Says who?"

"I. I Bella. I Emmett. I your step-brother says so."

I just started to laugh. Was he serious? I knew he wouldn´t like it, but this was just insane. Emmett had tried to tell me what to do and not to do before, but this was a little over the top even for him. I had always let him scare away boys and what not, but whenever I had told him to stop he had. So this was something different.

"Why Emmett? Give me one good reason why I shouldn´t go on this date with Edward and then maybe I will think about canceling this date." Emmett looked at me with big eyes and I could see that he was trying to come up with a good reason to why I shouldn´t go.

"Because I don't like him. There is something about him." I just snorted at him again.

"Because of what happened earlier today in class?" I had to ask, I had to hear what Emmett would say about what Edward called a pissing match.

"Yea that and it´s like he thinks he knows you better than anyone else. I just don't like him Bella." You could hear the frustration in his voice, he knew I wouldn´t think of any of this as a good enough reason to cancel the date and that frustrated him. "I´m going to lose you Bella. I know I am. When Alice reads the letters in the shoe box you will be best friends again. If you date Edward there won't be any time left for me, would there?"

"What Emmett? Are you kidding me. I told you, you're stuck with me."

"Yea you say that now, but you don't know that? Dad thought mom would stick around, he thought she loved him but she gave birth to me and just left. You and I are nothing to each other, we are not blood related, never been a couple, we are nothing to each other. You have your Dad here, with all your friends. I left mine back in Phoenix Bella. I have nothing right now..."

"What do you mean about nothing. You have me Emmett." I cut him off, I just couldn´t hear anymore of this. "Hate blood. It makes me sick, and Blood related people don't mean a thing. All most of them do is disappoint you at some point. Your mom left, so did mine. The only difference is that when my mom could use me to get what she wanted she did come to get me. She took me from my father to use me in her sick game she played to get your dad to date her and then marry her. She ruined my life, but in everything that happened I met you Emmett. I got a brother. I don't care what your blood is like, because if you cut yourself to see it or if I cut myself to see it. It would still smell the same and I will faint. We both know that. So I don't give a shit. And yea we aren´t a couple and will never be, thank god for that. It would just be too weird. You are my brother in every way, so don't give me any shit about blood. I love you and you know it. Don't even dare think otherwise. If you do I will kick your ass and you know it."

I had gotten louder and louder as I was talking. Who did Emmett think he was, he was everything to me. I would do everything for him to make him happy. He knew I loved him, he had to know that right?

The room was so quiet and the tension was so thick you could have carved it with a knife, I´m sure of it. Emmett and I were looking each other straight in the eyes. It felt like hours as we stood there trying to stare the other person down. He was not winning this. He would be stuck with me till one of us was dead and under the grown and even then the other person would not forget the other. I was sure of it. I had been sure of it for a long time and when Emmett asked to come to Forks with me there was no doubt in my mind that it would be like that. So why was he doubting it?

How could he doubt something I was so sure of? Or maybe he wasn´t doubting it, maybe he just thought of it different? Maybe he thought that we would never forget each other, but we wouldn´t talk. Brothers and sisters could be like that. We had all heard the stories, but that wouldn´t be us. Because we were best-friends too. So it couldn´t be us.

"Do you like Edward?" Emmett sat down, as he said it. "I don't just mean you like him because he is Alice´s brother."

"You know it´s not like that. I wouldn´t go on a date with Alice´s brother if he was Mike or anyone else except Edward." Emmett huffed again. "So you really like him." Em took a deep breath. "So... I have to get used to having him around then?"

I just nodded. Until it hit me, "Emmett, even if I didn´t like him, he would been around." Emmett looked at me dumfounded. "He is Alice´s brother. Alice is dating Jasper, who again is Rose´s Brother. You see, your stuck with him either way."

"But that didn´t mean that I had to like him, I could just tolerate him than."

"You could just tolerated him now too. You don't really have to like him, but it would be a big plus if you did." I smiled at Emmett, trying to be all cute and stuff. "But why don't you really like him?"

"It´s the way he is. Like he knows something I don't. And it just got all weird in class today when I said something about the fact that you had never kissed a guy or something. He just started to laugh then."

My eye were about to pop out of my head. I had never once kissed a guy in Phoenix, well not without spinning the bottle or on a dare. Like Emmett meant. But I had once, just weeks before I left Forks. It had been weird, but at the same time not. It was hard to explain, how it had happened and how it was.

"You have? haven´t you?" Emmett looked so shocked. "How does he know about this and not me?" I was biting my lip so much now that I was sure I would soon taste blood and hopefully faint. "Stop that Bella." And I did. "So are you going to tell me or what?"

Emmett was towering over me now and I felt small, so small right now. I´m not sure how to tell this. So I was probably looking like a fish out of water trying to get enough air to keep on breathing.

Emmett sat down on the bad next to me as he said the one name that I couldn´t get out. "Edward. Edward Cullen."

I just nodded.

"I thought you kind of hated him, not that you walked around and kissed him." It was quiet a little bit. "So how is it that I haven´t heard about this from Alice or anyone else that likes to share stuff about you?"

"No one knows" I whispered.

Emmett laughed, shocking me so much that I almost jump off the bed. "Alice doesn´t know about this? Oh my god, that´s just amazing. She knows everything. So it's only you and Edward that know then?"

"Yea I guess."

"So he has been hiding this from his sister and when he almost tells someone about it, it´s to try and piss me of. That´s kind of priceless." Emmett kept laughing before he kept going. "But he would have pissed me of though." He was shaking his head. "I would have told him that he could tell his lies to someone that would actually believe him. I thought you couldn´t stand him, back then."

I just shrugged. Emmett bumped me shoulder like he wanted more. "Well I didn´t. We never agreed on anything. He was to serious and I was to... well I don't know. I think he thought that I didn´t take life seriously enough or something. So I tried to beat him in any kind of sports I could. I tried to get him to laugh more and stuff like that. The sport thing was funny, because he was a really sore loser. But something changed around the year before I left."

"Come on Bella tell me the whole story. you know you want to."

So I did.

XxXxXx

_Alice sat and talked about her party. That stupid princess party._

_"So what are you wearing?" Alice asked, the first time in a long time she said anything to me. So I just shrugged my shoulders. "You have to were a princess dress Bella, what color do you have."_

_I looked over at Alice with big eyes, "Princess dress. Isn´t a dress good enough?" I asked shocked._

_"What kind of dress? " Alice asked worried._

_"The one I used at Christmas?"_

_"No Bella you can't were that, it´s not even pretty enough for Christmas. You have to have a dress that would fit a princess at a ball. Not one that would look ugly even next to Cinderella before she dresses for the ball." Alice said kind of angry like I should have figured that out by myself, but the invitation only said to were a dress, not what kind of dress. I tried to point that out to Alice, but she wouldn´t listen._

_So when dad come to pick me up later that day I told him what Alice had said. Dad had looked at me with this weird look, that I didn´t understand then. But when we come home next day he showed me a blue princess dress. I just looked at it and made a face._

_"Don't you like it?" Dad asked. I just shook my head. "Do you want another one, maybe another color?"_

_"No daddy it´s fine, it´s just so big." I said as I pointed at the lower half of the dress. "How am I going to sit in that dress without holding the thing there down. I hate princesses, it can't be any fun being a princess. They can't play soccer dressed like that." Dad just shook his head._

_"Oh I failed you as a dad haven´t I. I have raised you as a boy not a girl." He lifted me up and sat me on his lap then asked, "Are you sure you're a girl?"_

_"Yes, because I have to sit when I pee." Dad just laughed at that. "Alice asked me the same thing today, then told me that I was gross when I said that to her." That only made my dad laugh harder._

_"I´m sure she did."_

_As I went to bed that night, dad hung the dress on the outside of my closet. And as I fall asleep that night I was making a lot of stupid faces at the dress._

_The next day dad helped me get the stupid princess dress on, and as I thought you couldn´t play soccer in it. So I begged dad to have my shorts and t-shirt under the dress. It didn´t take long before he said yes. I felt so much better with them under the stupid dress._

_Dad walked me over to the Cullen´s house and Alice opened the door in a pink princess dress with a skirt that was much bigger than mine._

_I just stood with big eye looking at the dress. I could hear Charlie tell Alice that she looked like a real princess._

_"How can you walk in that thing without stepping on it?" it was all I could think about with my dress, and hers was even bigger so how could she even walk?_

_"I just do." Alice said. "I like that color." she said as she pointed at my dress._

_"Well it´s blue and it a stupid princess dress." I said, not liking the dress at all._

_I hadn´t meant to be rude, I just didn´t like the dress and even more so I didn´t like talking about it. Alice had taken it, well I don't really know how Alice had taken it, but not well. She hadn´t said anything to me at all for two hours, so I was mostly sitting alone. I was friends with everyone here, but they were all playing real princesses and well I didn´t know how to do that. So after I was sick of sitting there and listening to them talk and act all princess like I walked over to the window. The guys were playing soccer out there, so I walked out and down to them and asked if I could play._

_Mike looked up at my dress and said, "Girls can't play soccer."_

_I just stood there looking weird at him, I had always played with them and I had always been a girl._

_Taylor had bumped in to Mike and said, "But it´s Bella. She can play."_

_Mike then looked back over at me and said, "But Bella don't look like a girl. So that´s not Bella."_

_I could feel the sting in my eyes that told me I was about to cry. So I turned around and tried to run in to the house, but I tripped in the stupid princess dress and ripped it. So if I wasn´t a Bella in this dress then who was I? And since when couldn´t girls play soccer? Why was everything so wrong now?_

_I got up and started to run, I could hear someone run after me, but didn´t care enough to look at who it was. I ran past Alice and into one of the small rooms and tried to hide under the table. I could hear someone open and close the door as they walked in to the room. It didn´t take long before I could see Edward´s face looking under the table. As he saw me he got down on his knees and came under the table to me._

_"Don't cry Bella." Was all he said as he placed his arm around me. After a bit I stopped crying. I didn´t want Edward to think I was a cry baby._

_"Why can't girl´s play soccer?" It was the one thing that had bothered me the most. I like playing soccer, if I could I would have played it every single day all the time. And now I couldn´t play because I was a girl? I had always been a girl._

_"Because..." that was all Edward said. So I pushed his arm away, and just looked at him. "I think it because some boys don't want them to."_

_"But I have always played soccer, so why can't I now?"_

_Edward looked at me again a long time like he was really thinking about it. "Maybe because this is the first time you asked when you looked all girly?"_

_"Like a princess?" I asked in disbelief._

_"Like a princess." Edward said without even thinking about it._

_"But what does a princesses do for fun then?" Because in my eye soccer was one the things that was funniest to do._

_Edward looked like he was in thought again. "Well some of them play with a ball made out of gold, or talk to animals, or have mean step-sister."_

_"But I don't have any of that and I don't understand what any animals says"_

_"Except for the parrot on the marked." Edward pointed out and we laughed a little. After a little while Edward remembered something else princesses did, "There is one more thing that princesses do in all the books. They kiss a prince."_

_We both wrinkled our noses at that. "But I don't have a prince." I pointed out._

_"But you're not a real princess either." Edward pointed out._

_"So I need a fake prince then." I pointed out to Edward. "But where do I find a fake prince?"_

_"Maybe Mike or Taylor know where I can find one" I said after Edward and I had been thinking a little bit._

_"Or maybe I can be your fake prince?" Edward asked. It was like he didn´t like to think Mike or Taylor could think about any one better. I looked at Edward as I thought about it._

_"Well Alice is the prettiest princess, so I guess you could be a prince." Edward nodded. We looked at each other for a bit. "So if I´m a fake princess and you a fake prince and were supposed to do as prince and princesses do, then we have to kiss?"_

_"Guess so." Edward answered._

_We looked at each other and leaned toward each other, but our noses bumped together. So Edward took and placed one hand on each of my cheeks and I blushed a little as he did. He tilted his head a little to the side and held my face as he leaned in for the kiss. My lips met his and they were tight together for a little while, until we both started to laugh._

_We pulled apart and as we did I could feel a little tingling on my lips. We both dried our lips off and agreed that we would never tell anyone about this._

_We made our way out from under the table and out of the room. I walked in to the girls knowing I had done something that princesses did and Edward walked out to the guys to play more soccer._

XxXxXxXx

Surprise, surprise. Emmett had been quiet as I was telling him the story. But now he was cracking up. "Oh my god. I can't believe Edward tricked you in to kissing him." Emmett was laughing so loud that I wasn´t sure I had heard him right. As he was laughing a little less he started to talk again. "Come on Bella you have to agree with me. Edward tricked you into kissing him." What was Emmett talking about. "Come on Bella. He walked after you and comfort you, no guy does that if he doesn´t think there is something in it for him."

"What are you talking about? A little kid doesn´t comfort anyone just because he thinks there something in it for him."

"Of course we do." He was done laughing now. "If we do comfort someone were after something. A little boy thinks it his fault and does it to get out of trouble or to get a treat if he knows it´s not his fault. When we get older it´s still the same."

"But it wasn´t Edward´s fault and he didn´t get a treat."

"HA! That´s what you think, but he would get to have his arm around you, because that´s how we comfort each other right?" Emmett looked at me and I nodded. "So he liked you back then. He wanted to have an excuse to hold you."

"He didn´t like me and he didn´t trick me."

"Oh no. If you remember correctly then he didn´t have to think about if you looked like a princess or not. He was the one that said all the stuff about what princesses do Bella, even the kiss. He was the one that thought about the fake prince and the one that said he was up for the job. And when your first attempt failed he was the one that held your face so that your second go wouldn´t be failed."

I looked at Emmett in shock. I just couldn't wrap my brain around what I was hearing, not knowing what to believe as Emmett had this big smile on his face. "No Emmett your wrong."

"Think what you want, but I know I´m right." He said as he walked out of my room and closed the door behind him.

There was no way that Emmett was right, Edward had not... what did he call it. Oh right trick me in to kissing him. No. There was no way. Edward and I didn´t even like each other back then, so there was no reason for him to trick me in to kissing him.

This had been a weird day. The game with Edward. Edward showing up here and the fact that we really talked. And I had somehow let him in a little, not only in the house but also in to my life, and into some of my thoughts. Then there was Alice and our talk and me giving her the shoe-box. Wonder if she´s reading the letters.

And to top it all of there had also been all this weird stuff with Emmett. Now he thinks that Edward was tricking me in to kissing him. God this was all just weird.

I was so tired now everything today was so draining. I was happy when I heard dads car pull up in the drive-way. As soon as he got in the door I had reached the bottom of the stairs and jumped into arms giving him a huge hug. He started to laugh. "Love you to Bella." he said between laughs and put me down on the floor. As he did it he kissed me on the top of my head. "Had a good day?"

"Kind of, but I´m so tired that I´m going to bed."

"Okay kiddo, have a good night then."

"You to dad, and by the way I have a date with Edward on Friday. Love you." I run up stairs as I said it. I know it´s not the right way to tell him, but I had to tell him and I had to do it before Emmett did it. So because I was so tired I took the easy way out, without having to look at him as I said it or having to hear what he had to say.

I closed the bathroom door behind me did my nightly routine and went to bed. Hoping I would get a night without any drama.

As I woke up I realized that it had been a good night, one of the best nights of sleep I had had in a long time. I had slept longer then I had in a long time. So I was feeling really well rested.

I went to the bathroom and took an shower where I decided that I would make breakfast for Emmett, since dad would probably be out fishing at this time.

Oh, how wrong could I be. When I walked in to the kitchen wondering what to make for Emmett, I saw dad. He was sitting in his chair holding a cup of coffee, and well he didn´t look happy.

"Good morning Daddy." I said in a sweet voice. "I thought you would be out fishing by now."

"Don't you Daddy me." He said trying to us his strict voice. "I thought so to, but someone wouldn´t talk to me last night after they sprung a huge surprise on me. Ring any bells, Bella?"

I just bit my lip, he didn´t like the dating thing.

"Oh you mean that I have a date on Friday?"

"Yes that and that it is with Edward." There was a little smile playing on his lips now. "Are we talking about Edward Cullen or is there another Edward in town that I don´t know about?"

"Dad. You know it´s Edward Cullen the only other Edward combination in town is Edward Anthony Cullen and you know it." That made dad laugh. "And that´s the same guy."

"So date?" Dad made a face. "Didn´t you say that you didn´t date?"

"Well I have never dated before and the only thing I said about dating was that I didn´t date Emmett."

"I thought that we could make that over to be I don't date at all, ever.?" I laughed a little. "Okay, so where is this so called date going to be?"

"At the fair in Port Angels." Dad made a face again. "Dad Emmett, Alice, Rosalie and Jasper are also going, so they will all be there. Edward and I are just going in a different car and hanging out together. Think of it like that and it will be fine."

"I don't like this Bells, I just got you back and now you want to date?" I laughed as I put my arms around dad.

"You know that I´m not going anywhere even if I date, well at least until I´m off to college. Then I don't know what will happen."

"Oh are you going to College. Didn´t think you had it in you." We both laughed before dad got all serious again. "Okay Bella go on your date with that Edward Cullen boy, but tell him this. If he hurts you, he will pay."

I laughed and gave him a hug. Telling him that I could handle myself.

The rest of the weekend was just me and Emmett hanging out. He was teasing me the whole time about Edward tricking me into kissing him, but I tried to ignore him. But if you looked away from that it was fun and well it was really what we needed. We hadn´t been hanging out much of the time we had lived in Forks, so it was good. And after the talk we had on Friday. A weekend together was really what we needed.

But the more Emmett teased about the kiss thing, the more I thought about it. Could Emmett really be telling the truth?

Somehow I will find out the truth. I will get to the bottom of it I had to ask Edward, and well would I dare that?

* * *

AN:

So what do you think? Liked it, Hated it?

I know there´s not any really Bella Edward stuff in this chapter, but dont hate me for it pleas. There will be in the next chapter I promise.

*sees*


	25. how will this go?

...

Well I have to tell you Alice that I got a letter from your brother today. It did kind of not go so well for me. As always he somehow gets under my skin, so well in anger I wrote him a letter and before I knew it I had posted it to him. It didn´t occur to me before I was home what I really had done.

I really wish it was that easy to write to you too. Not that I want to write to you out of anger, but you know what I mean.

It´s been awhile since I have seen you now, and well I miss you. I of course know that you miss me, because unlike me you actually post your letters to me. I really wish I did to.

I have many letters to you just laying here, I think I should just throw them out most of the time. But then I think that maybe someday I will give them to you. Hopefully you and I can be what we used to be.

I also know it's been forever since you have heard anything from me, but in my defense that´s not all my fault. But I haven´t told you that yet.

You did write to me almost every week the first six months. Of course you know that, but what you don't know is that I did that too. I did write to you, it´s just that they never got posted. Renee said she did send them, but I have found them. All the letters I thought I was sending you were in her room. I threw a hissy fit when I found them and got grounded for that. Which is the first time ever. Emmett laughed at that since he thinks that I never ever get into any trouble.

In the letters I have written I have asked you to stop writing things about my dad, but now I know why you never stopped. I'm just so angry with him, but I also miss him so much. So it's just hard reading about him.

After I found all the letters, I just couldn´t bring myself to send new-ones. I´m just so embarrassed about everything. So well with that said I feel even more stupid and I´m pretty sure that this won't be sent either so it´s kind of stupid. But maybe someday I will stop being stupid and send one, or all of them. I miss you so much I really do. Hope everything is good with you and everyone else in Forks.

Oh and by the way, Emmett keeps bugging me about sending some kind of letter to you, and when I tell him (If I ever tell him) that I did send one to your brother he will get pissed at me. Not something that I`m looking forward to. But I have just myself to blame. If I send this you would not know who Emmett is, but he is my step-bother...

EPOV

Alice stopped reading just as suddenly as she had started. I just sat there not knowing what to say and Alice just sat there and looked at me. It was like she wanted me to say something, but this time I didn´t know what she wanted me to say. Luckily Alice broke the silence.

"She thought she had sent some letters to me, a bunch of them really. It was Renee, her own mother... "Alice said the word mother like it was leaving a bad taste in her mouth. "... didn´t post them for her."

I still didn´t say anything, How could I? I had sent Bella a letter were I told her how disgusting I thought she was and she wasn´t the one to blame. That only made me feel disgusted with myself.

"Did she write a lot of letters?" I had to know, I kind of knew the answer already. Alice had come home with a shoe-box last night after she had been at Bella´s place. The box in question was not a brand Alice would have bought herself, but it was a brand that I had seen Bella were.

"Yeah Edward, she had been writing so much that I haven't gotten through them all yet." Alice smiled one of her big smiles. A smile that she used before Bella left was there all the time but after Bella, well it hadn´t been there so often. "She used me like a dairy. There so much in the letters it´s... I don't even know. I think that by reading all of the letters I will know almost everything that she has been up to for the last eight years."

Hearing this made me want to go down to her room and steal all the letters. I wanted to know everything and for the first time since I can remember I was actually jealous of my own twin sister.

Alice put her arms around me, like she knew that I wanted to leave the room, and hugged me.

"She did write. She just didn´t send them. I wish she had though." Alice still kept her arms around me. "But she did write, and she did write a lot. She really cared, she didn´t just forget about me."

She kept saying something more, but I couldn´t make it out, because she started to cry, hard.

"Yeah, she cared. Bella never forgot about you." I said to her in a hushed voice, trying to sooth her. Because I didn´t like it when my sister cried.

As Alice cried I started to think about what had happened.

I was sitting at my computer downloading some new music. When Alice had come in to my room. She scared me a little, because I had been in my own thoughts. Thinking about my date with Bella. Alice didn´t say anything, just laid down on my bed. So I turned back to my computer and kept downloading music. It wasn´t the first time Alice had entered my room and just been quiet for awhile. She would talk when she knew what to say and this time was one of those times. I was shocked when this time she started to read something and it took me a little while before I understood what she was reading. She was reading a letter from Bella. She started in the middle of the letter and stopped before the ending. Was that all? Really?

After a bit Alice stopped crying . "I think I will go and call Jasper now." Alice kissed my cheek just before she left the room. Left me alone. Left me to think about what I had just learned.

I was left alone, with only my thought and right now, I didn´t like that at all.

Bella had been writing to Alice all along, but her mother had not sent them. After a few years she had found them, but then she still didn't send any of the letters. She didn´t know how to handle the situation. I guess I get that. I could really, but even so I didn´t like it. Not one freaking bit.

Alice would have understand, and she knew it. I know she did.

That´s why she gave her the letters now. Because she also knew that Alice would understand now. Alice would also forgive her, maybe not right away, but in time. That was probably one of the things that made Bella write letters even after she found the ones that Renee hadn´t sent. Not that that would have been the only reason. It was clear as day to everyone that had talked to Bella after she got back that she had been and still was missing Alice.

To me after talking to Bella as much as I had, well I knew that Bella had never stopped caring about Alice. I also knew that being so close to Alice, but not talking to her everyday was hurting her a great deal.

As Alice´s twin brother I knew that Alice had felt just the same.

But I also know that she can't be rushed into figuring this out. That she has to do all on her own.

She has to forgive Bella on her own terms. Frankly Alice didn´t even let herself know just how much Bella had hurt her over the past years until she saw her. So yeah, we all just had to wait and see.

We had our family dinner and Alice was going on and on about the letters. Which I´m totally fine with. I love hearing about them. Lies, Lies, Lies.

I hate hearing about them, I hate that Alice knows so much more than me. I hate mostly that I just can't go in to her room, take all the letters and just read them too.

"So, she did write a lot of letters I take it." Dad said with a big smile.

"Yeah!" Alice nodded like a crazy person. "She did, and everything is in them. I mean everything." she had this big smile on her face as she said it.

I tuned her out after that. Getting lost in my own mind.

I hated that Bella had written to Alice, I hated that Alice had the letters, I hated that Alice knew more about Bella then me. I hated that I hated all of this. But I really hated that Bella hadn´t told me anything about it.

Bella hadn´t told me anything about this... Bella hadn´t told me anything about this.

I wasn´t suppose to know anything about them. I should have told Alice to stop reading.

Bella should have been the one to tell me this, not Alice.

What if Bella didn´t want me to know?

And What would she do when she found out that I knew?

The dinner got finished, the night went on and all I could think about was Bella and that I should not know about what was in the one letter Alice had read to me.

This was all messed up and I was thinking like a girl.

The one big thing that I couldn´t stop thinking about was, what if she would call of the date, what if this meant that she wouldn´t have anything more to do with me after this?

The night come and went and so did Sunday. Even how slow Sunday went, Monday was there long before I was ready for it.

Soon I was standing at school looking for Bella and her truck.

As I stood there looking for her Mike come up to me.

"So I heard that Bella and Emmett never have been a couple." Mike said, I just nodded. He smiled a little. "So you knew? Why didn´t you say anything to me. She´s smoking hot and all the guys have been patiently waiting because we thought she was off the market."

"She is."

"Oh?" Mike looked at me with big eyes, he just loves gossip. Sometimes I think that he should have been a girl with how much he likes it. "Who? I haven´t heard anything?"

I looked over at him, I wanted to say that it was me, That I was the one, but not knowing what Bella would do after we talked I didn´t say anything. I would wait till after we had talked. Just then the old beat up truck come into view. I smiled a little as I started to look for Alice sure she would want to talk to Bella, but didn´t see her anywhere. The car hadn´t even came to a full stop before the passenger door was opened. I saw Bella jump out of the car, a big smile was on my face as I watched her walk towards me with a smile just as big on her face.

"You have some explaining to do." She said as she took my hand and pulled me with her. All I could think was, how did she know? Who could have told her? But if she knew and was pissed then why would she smile? She was still holding my hand to. It was something that didn´t add up. As the warning bell rang I tugged her hand a little and she stopped to look at me. Still the smile was there and her eyes twinkled a little. So I smiled back at her.

I had just forgot all about Mike.

"What about class?" I whispered as she pull me thru the school.

"You want to go?" I just shook my head no. "Good."

She had let go of my hand now and started to walk again. I stood watching her as she walked away. She never turned to look and see if I was following or not. Of course I started to follow. As I caught up with her she looked up at me and smiled. Then she did something that really threw me off. She stopped and opened one of the doors and walked in. She laughed a little and cocked her head to the left and gave me a raised eyebrow saying,

"You coming?"

Once again I didn´t say anything just nodded my yes.

"I had an interesting talk with Emmett." Emmett? what did he have to do with anything? "And?" I asked. She looked at me a little like she didn´t know why I didn´t say more.

"We talked about the.. what was it you called it? Oh yes.. A pissing match? Yeah that´s it!" Now she really had lost me. I knew that she would be asking him about it, that was no secret. "He said what really threw him off was that you seemed to know about a kiss.?"

I´m sure my eyes were half way out of my head now. Not the kiss. I had to have shook my head a little because I heard Bella say, "Don't shake your head." She laughed a little nervous now and her eyes were all over the place. Bella wouldn't look at me, Weird. "If you make someone cry why do you comfort them?"

What? I think I am getting whip lash. She was all over the place.

"If someone was cry and it´s not your fault that they started to cry, why would you comfort them?"

She looked serious as she asked, but I didn't understand. And her question was weird? Why would you comfort someone?

"Why do you ask? Because I really don't know?"

Bella bit her lip a little before she answered. "Well Emmett said that the only reason a guy would comfort someone is;

A) It´s his fault and he knows he's in trouble. If he comforts the person maybe he wouldn´t be in so much trouble.

B) It´s not his fault and he hopes he would get something out of it. Like a treat or something?

So all I´m wondering is if you agree with him?"

Emmett had a point, you somehow always hoped to get something out of it. So not knowing where she wanted to go with it, I tried to talk around it. "Well yea Emmett has a point. Somehow, but I can only talk for me. I always hope that there will be something waiting on the other side, but..."

"OH MY GOD!" Bella cut me off, smiling a shy smile. "I told Emmett about the kiss."

Now I got it. I had run after her. I had comforted her and god. I had thought that she wouldn´t remember it all.

"I think you know what I´m about to ask now. I can see it on your face." She let a little giggle get passed her lips before she continued. She was so cute, there she stood all shy and somehow her shyness loosened my nerves. "Did you want to kiss me? Back then I mean?" She hit my arm playfully because I had raised my eyebrows at her.

"Well it wasn´t planed or anything. But somehow when I remember the kissing thing I wanted to be the one to kiss you." I took a little glance over at Bella, she just looked shocked. Which fascinated me, she had have thought at some point that I had wanted it or why would she ask?

"But you hated me? I-I mean, w-why would you want to kiss me?" Bella had taken a seat on the floor. I walk over and sat next to her.

"I hated the princess party. Was so sick hearing about it. I was so looking forward to it being over. We, the boys and I, had all been talking about it. How it was so stupid and on top of that we all agreed that you would never look like a princess." I looked over at Bella and her eyes were on me. She didn't interrupt so I was going to continue but I hoped that she wouldn´t be angry or something about the next thing I would say. "In our eyes you were not a girl, you were just one of us."

Bella still didn´t say anything when I stopped. I looked away and continued.

"When you come out and asked to play, well that's the first time we all so you as a girl. The dark blue dress made you look more girly then Alice, so when you asked to play all I could think about was how can she play in that dress. I didn´t really hear what Mike said before you run away, the only thing I knew was that you looked so sad. I had never seen you like that either. So I just run after you. The kissing thing well it was just... well I don't know, what got into me with that, but one thing is for sure, I´m not sorry about it."

"Emmett seems to think that you tricked me in to giving you my first kiss."

"Well in some way's he's right. But it wasn´t why I comforted you." Bella just smiled at me and I back. "But I have to say it was a big plus."

At that Bella did the one thing that she used to do all the time, she stuck her tongue out at me, before she started to laugh. My smile only grew bigger at the sound of her laugh. We just sat there for a bit, first period had already started. So now we would just wait till the next period. I looked over at Bella she had this little smile on her lips.

I had to tell her. Even if that meant that this, Bella and me, ended before it even began. Bella´s eyes met mine.

"What´s wrong?" Bella´s voice was so low that it was hard to hear.

But what got to me was that she could see that something was wrong just by looking at me. That has to count for something.

"You know the box you gave Alice." Bella nodded, and you could see on her face that she thought that to be a stupid question. "Uhm... well... god this is hard."

"Did she read the letters?" Bella´s voice was full of some kind of hope. I nodded as she looked at me. "So what´s hard? She hated them and has given you orders to keep me away from her?" Bella lifted her eyebrow as she said it. It was like she was trying to make me smile or something.

"No of course not. She didn´t come out of her room for more then to get something to eat. But when she did come out she came to my room." I didn´t dare look at Bella as I said the rest. "I didn´t know what she was doing at first. You see she just came into my room took a seat on my bed, and then she just started to read. I had no idea what she was reading or why she was reading out loud to me. It took a bit of her reading before I understood that it had something to do with you."

I stopped, still not looking at Bella hoping she would say something. But she didn´t. "Alice told me after she had read a bit that she had gotten the box from you and that it was full of letters from you. I know that I shouldn´t have let Alice read more from the letters then, but I didn´t. I wish..."

"Why shouldn´t you have let her read more Edward?" My head turned to look at Bella. What? Did she just ask me why I shouldn´t? "It´s Alice's letters, it´s hers to do as she pleases with. And I know Alice, Edward. I always knew that she would read some of it to you. That´s just Alice. If I wanted her to keep it to herself, well then I would have asked her to. Or even better not given her the box."

"So you're not mad or anything?"

Bella´s face broke into a big smile at that. "Mad? You thought I would get mad? It´s not like I wouldn´t have told you any of it with time anyway. And even so, it is Alice´s letters. So if she wants to share them with you, let her."

She wasn´t mad, angry or anything, and the best part she has just said that she would have told me. Not right now, but I would take it and she did know Alice. She had figured out that I would know something either way. So all was good.

"Can I ask one question. It´s about the letters?" Bella nodded, so I kept going. "I get that Renee should have posted the first ones, but when you found them why didn´t you send them then?"

She was biting her bottom lip now. "Well you see. Alice´s letters had started to come less often, and she did write more and more about dad at that time. I didn´t want to hear about him, and I felt stupid. When I found the letters I re-read all the letters I had gotten from Alice and felt stupid because I should have seen it in her letters that she hadn´t gotten any from me. She never answered any of my weird questions. I should have known. So I felt stupid and embarrassed, about that. And then there was all the anger I felt for Renee and dad that had let her take me with her. When I was over the anger, or the most of the anger, I did after awhile feel less stupid because Alice never said it straight out that she hadn´t got the letter. I still felt embarrassed."

"You did write to me though. Even if it was out of anger." I smiled at Bella, but she didn´t smile back.

"You hit a nerve with your letter. I felt like everyone was trying to push me. The day before your letter Renee had handed me the phone, I thought it was Emmett, but it was dad. He kind of tried to push the whole writing to Alice, said that he had talked to her. He said that I would regret not writing to her. All of this was just a few months after I had found the letters and well I just hung up on him. sitting back with the feeling that he cared more about Alice then me, which is stupid. So I was angry with Alice at that point. So when your letter came the next day. It was just the tip of the iceberg, so I let my anger out into the letter I sent you. Because you always thought you were better than me, so when I read your letter I just snapped. Emmett always says that you should be glad you were so far away, because if looks could kill you would have been dead ten times over."

"So Emmett was there when you got the letter. No wonder he hates me." I totally did a face palm to myself.

"That was what my paper in Mr. Brandon's class was about, the letter I wrote to you." She shook her head. "Something small that, meant a lot."

"Hum. me to. I didn´t know what to think when I got your letter. You don't know what you were talking about. Not everything is my fault. Those words have played around in my head often. Made an impact on me too. After that I tried to not judge so fast, but what really got to me was that I knew what I was talking about. I knew how Alice had it. I knew that she did miss you and I knew that you hadn´t been writing back to her. How could that not be your fault?" I took a deep breath. "But I know now what you meant about it."

"I can't believe you thought I would be mad about Alice reading you my letters."

"What? I watch TV and girls at school get angry about a whole lot less than that. Plus it wasn´t Alice's to share with me."

"Do you know what the best part about being friends with Alice before was?" I just shook my head. "The way that there were no secrets. I knew everything I wanted to know about her, more then I wanted to know about you and she knew everything about me. Well except one little thing that is. The kiss. "

Yeah the kiss, Alice didn´t know about that and if she would have ever gotten to know about it, I think I´d be dead then. Because she would've killed me because of it.

I took placed my hand around Bella´s shoulder, and she looked up at me smiling. "And I hope she never will, because if she does I´m a dead man."

Bella laughed. "I hope that you can run fast then. Because I´m sorry to tell you this, but Emmett sucks at keeping secrets that he knows other people would love to know. He can also brag about knowing something before everyone else."

"I can run pretty fast." Was what I said, but inside I was screaming NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Bella laughed at me, so I think that it was written all over my face.

"Don't worry. I can take the blame. Emmett will not let her touch me. Especially because it would be his fault that she would want to do some harm to me." We both laughed at that. "We have broken some rules though."

"What do you mean?"

"We have kissed, but we haven´t been on our first date yet." Bella smiled up at me and the first thing that came to mind was that I wouldn´t mind kissing her again before the date. "But then again, I have never been one to follow the girly rules."

I looked down and my eyes shifting from her eyes to her lips, hers did the same. Just as I started to lean down, the bell rang signaling the end of the first period the one we never went to today. I think I heard Bella whisper something like 'Stupid school bell,' but I´m not sure. I got up and stuck my hand out to help Bella up, when she was up ,we stood really close. Ones again my eyes started to shift from her eyes to her lips and I had still not let go of her arm. She leaned in a bit and I bent down a little, and just as our lips was suppose to meet the door flew open.

Bella jumped a little from me, but since I still had a hold of her arm she didn´t get far.

"Edward my man, who do you got there?" It was Mike´s voice, something that meant that everybody would know about it before the end of the school day. I was about to pull Bella to me when she stepped closer to me and laid her other arm around my neck, pulled me down and kissed me. It was a soft kiss and just lips nothing big but it left me wanting more. As she pulled back she whispered, "At least now it would be kind of true when he starts to tell everyone that we made out in an empty classroom. She let go of me and walked past, I had let go of her arm as she had kissed me.

"Hi Mike." Was all she said before she left.

I didn´t want to turn, I didn´t want to hear what Mike had to say. All I wanted was for Bella to get back here and kiss me again.

"Thought you said that she was of the market and that you didn´t know who she was dating?" Mike´s voice was kind of angry, something I didn´t understand. So I turned around and yeah I was right, there was a lot of anger not only in his voice but also on his face.

"Never said I didn´t know who she has a date with." I never had, I hadn´t said anything, so he had just thought that himself.

"How long have you known that Bella and Emmett weren't dating."

"Since the first week, why?" What was his point.

"Was that to keep the competition away? Afraid you would have had some competition?" I just shook my head. "Then why didn´t you tell me or the others about it?"

"Why would I. Bella let everyone assume they were and so did Emmett. But she never lied about it. You could have asked her and then she would have told you." I was getting frustrated now. "And for the competition part, that had nothing to do with it. I just didn´t want you guys circling around her all the time. She wouldn´t have like that anyway. The thing she wants the most now is to have a friendship with Alice again."

"Sure that´s why." Mike rolled his eyes at me, like he wasn´t believing me. Not that I´m saying he was wrong in not believing me, because he had a point. Not that I would ever tell him that. " But are you sure that´s she´s not using you to get that friendship?" He said. At that I just laughed and the face Mike made made me laugh even harder. If it was one thing I was sure of, well then it would be that Bella would not be using me like that. Never. And even if I wasn´t sure of it, then what everyone that knew her said would have been enough to make me sure of it.

"Yes Mike, that I´m sure of." and with that I walked out of the classroom and toward my next class. Or should I say my first class for today.

Emmett had flipped the first time he heard the rumors that Bella had befriended Rosalie and Jasper to get closer to Alice. Telling both of them that that was a lot of crap. And the chief had also had some kind of confrontation in one of the stores when some of the towns gossip ladies had said something like that as well. And to top it all off. That´s just not Bella. She has never used anyone like that, so why should she start now?

I trusted Bella. She had never done anything bad to me, not even when we hated each other. The only thing she ever did was move and not keep in touch and now, now that I knew more about it I couldn´t really blame her.

When you're not sure of yourself, well then it is harder to be sure about something you don't have any control over.

Like if someone loves you or not. Even If it´s your own dad I guess.

Hopefully it's all over, and hopefully I will never know how that really feels.

* * *

**AN:**

_I´so sorry for this slow update. Not everything is as it should be. Lift just keeps getting in the way for me to do fast updates. So so sorry for that._

_This winter has just been crazy, hopefully will the spring and summer be more relaxing and I will get the time to write like I want to._

_I cant promise any fast updates right know, we have a trial coming up next week and hopefully it will be over fast. My sister needs that and so she can go back to her normal life._

_Whit that said, I hope you all are well._

_Pleas tell me what you think about the story._

_*SeeS*_

Siw


	26. Friends!

BPOV

Oh my god.

As the door closed behind me I started to feel like I was hyperventilating. I had not only kissed Edward, I did it in front of Mike fucking-gossip-king Newton. Now everyone would know. Okay, so Mike would probably tell everyone that we had kissed even if it wasn´t true, but now knowing that it was well that scared me a little. I was a piece of shit. I had just left Edward in there with Mike. God that was not good. What would Mike say?

I was trying not to think about it at all, but that was not easy. Mike was weird. I never knew what he would say or do. The weird thing is that I liked him before I moved, but now he just crept me out. He was always asking a lot of question without really asking. I never knew what to say to him. And apparently I never answered any of his unspoken question, because he always got so frustrated with me.

"I need to speak to you on lunch break:" I jumped as someone, well not someone Alice started to talk to me. I hadn´t seen her come up to me. To wrapped up in my own head. So I just nodded, as I looked at her I saw that she was smiling. Not a little smile that's usually been on her lips when she would talk to me, but a full on smile. A lot like the ones she gave to Jasper. God I wish that they had made up. They were just perfect for one and other. "Good, so by the old tree?" I nodded again.

We had had many good times at the old tree, but also a lot of our fights. Hopefully this would be one of the good times, and what Edward had told me made me believe that it would be.

The classes before lunch went both to slow and too fast. First they want to slow because I really would like to talk to Alice and I hoped for good news. I know that my place in her life was taken. The best-friend place was taken by Rose, I would love to say that I was okay with it, but that would be a big fat lie. But as the time went I could feel myself getting more and more nervous. Where had the feeling that this would be okay coming from?

It was in something Edward said. I had asked him if Alice had sent him to tell me to keep away from her. He had said no, But was that really good news or did that just mean that she wanted to say it me herself.

Finally the bell for lunch rang and I realized I was not ready for this. What would I do if she was telling me to keep away. It hadn´t looked like it when she talked to me after first class, but that wasn´t saying much. That could just be an act.

I picked up my stuff and went to my locker before heading out to the old tree. It was a bit of a walk, but that´s was okay. Honestly I really needed that time. I needed to calm myself. This was Alice. This was my best-friend, even if I was replaced she was still mine. Deep down I knew that no matter what she wouldn´t just send me away. Alice Cullen was not like that!

When I took the next turn I would see the old tree, so I stopped took a deep breath and let it out slowly before taking the turn.

Alice was there and she didn´t look happy. Well she looked a little pissed?. Okay, I can do this. I told, myself as I took another deep breath. I pulled myself together and walked over to what looked like a pissed Alice. I was a few feet away from her when her eyes met mine.

"Isabella Maria Swan I can't believe you would do that!" I stopped walking and just looked at Alice, what was she talking about? What had I done now? "Oh don't you give me that look. You know what I´m talking about."

I just stood there, not saying anything, not doing anything.

"You and my brother kissed. Or made out, is what people are saying." I relaxed a little. "Skipping first class to make out with my twin and when I talked to you. You didn´t even tell me. That´s just disrespectful."

I let out the breath I didn´t even know I was holding and I could feel my lips pulling up to a little smile. "Don´t you smile like that. Do you know how hurtful it is to hear from someone else that you and my brother had your first kiss today." Alice was pouting know. Her bottom lip sticking out. This was the Alice I knew and loved.

I could feel my smile getting bigger, I tried to hide it, but I couldn´t help it. I could also see a little smile tugging on Alice´s lips.

"So?" Was all she said next. That was a question with so many answers. I knew that with my luck right now that I would be answering the wrong ones.

"I needed to talk to Edward that was why we were skipping and we never 'made out'. I kissed him after Mike came into the class-room." I just hoped that I had at least given her some of the answers she wanted.

"Why would you do that? I mean why would you kiss him if you already knew that Mike was in the room?"

"Well, first the damn school bell interrupted our moment and then Mike did." I started slowly. "So Mike would have said that we did either way. So why not let it be a little bit of truth in it." I shrugged my shoulders. That had been my excuse all along. There would be rumors either way.

"Okay." Alice dragged it out, she had this unsure look on her face. So I just waited, not saying any more. "But that doesn't explain why you didn´t tell me?"

"Well." I stopped, not knowing why. "well, I didn´t tell you because I don't know anything anymore." Alice was about to say something, but I held up my hand to stop her. "I´m not sure if you want to know that stuff. Heck I´m not even sure if you want to know anything about me. I would love to tell you everything about what´s happening to me, but I don't really know if you want to know. But the main reason I didn´t tell you is because I was so shocked that I even did that. So when you asked me to meet you here I was you a little out of it."

"I want to know." Alice said. "I don't know if you and I will ever be as we were, because you hurt me. I know that you were hurt to, but that was not me doing it to you." I knew Alice was right, I had always known that I had hurt her and that she had never hurt me. At least not like that. "I liked that you did write, I would have loved it if you had sent some of them." Alice looked down a little embarrassed. "First I thought that you had just written down a lot of stuff to just make it seem like you had been writing to me as well." I was about to say that I hadn´t done that, but now it was Alice turn to stop me. "I know that you didn´t, but that does not mean that I didn´t think it at first. The reason I know that you didn´t is the fact that I know you and you wouldn´t do that. I also know that by looking at your hand writing. It goes from childish to more grown up. I can even tell that some days you were in a hurry to write them and some days you took your time with them. I even think that in some of them you thought that you would send them, but that something stopped you right before you did."

Of course she was right, so I just nodded. I could hear my stomach rumble right after I did that. It was a little embarrassing, but I was hungry. Alice just giggled at it. "I think we should get back so you could get some lunch before next class."

So we started to walk back. Neither of us said anything. I had some questions for her, but once again I didn´t really know where we stood. Would it be okay for me to ask them or not. Out of frustration I stopped walking. It didn´t take long before Alice did the same and looked at me questionably.

"I hate this, but I have to ask. What are we now?" I felt so stupid asking this, it was like I was asking a guy if we were girlfriend/boyfriend. "I mean are we talking now? Are we trying to be friends? Or has nothing changed and I can only talk to you when you talk to me?"

"What?" Alice looked shocked. "You felt like you could only talk to me when I talked to you?"

"Well yea. Mostly."

"I don't like that at all. God Bella. I don't want that. I have never wanted that." Alice looked down. "So I get to choose then?"

Alice looked up a little so I just nodded. "Friends than?" It was a little question in there. I didn´t like that. Was the question if we were friends or if I wanted us to be friends? God this was frustrating.

"I want to be friends Alice, like I said on Friday you are my best-friend. Always has been and always will be. I´m the one that ruined everything, and I shouldn't be the one doing the choosing here. I want the friendship, but it´s up to you. I know that it won't be the same but that doesn't mean that I don't want it." As I stopped talking I could feel two small arms squishing me.

Alice was hugging me. This I knew what it meant. We were friends, not like we used to be, but still friends.

XxXxXx

EPOV

I hadn´t seen Bella since she kissed me. Every time I thought about it I smiled. The rumors were out there and I didn´t care. This meant that I was one step closer to making her mine and only mine. No other guys allowed. None of them could touch her, and if any of them did I could get angry and have a right to be so. But for that to happen, I had to have at least one date with her.

And even more important I had to get on Emmett´s good side. And that would be a hard task, I think.

I walked over to the cafeteria, hoping to see Bella. Like I said, I haven't seen her since she kissed me.

God I want another kiss. A bigger one. A real kiss. A kiss that no one can interrupt.

I saw Jasper, Rose and Emmett sitting at our usual table, but no Bella or Alice. That could mean one of two things. One they were working things out or two they are both late.

I want Alice and Bella to work things out. I do, I really, really do. But some part of me knows that if they do Bella would go to Alice and not to me when she needed to talk. And even as hard that this is to say, I don't like the idea of that. I like that Bella comes to me and I don't want that to stop. Ever.

I stood in line waiting to pay. I had gotten food for myself, Alice and Bella. Knowing that if they were talking they would have little time to eat. So if they could spare time on that it would all be good.

"So where is Bella?" I could tell that he was smirking at me. "She got tired after one kiss?" He was even laughing at his own joke or something.

The first thought was, no she was not. But then again, doubt crept in. How could I be sure it hasn´t? It´s not like I had talked to Bella after the kiss.

Some big part of me told me that she wasn´t, but I couldn´t be sure.

"So is it true, Cullen? Did you and Bella make out?" Taylor asked, I didn´t say anything. "She really looks like a good kisser. With the way she bites her lips. God I wish it was me doing that to her lips."

I was just about to jump on him and bite him, when someone put a hand on my shoulder. As someone did that, I saw Tyler sink down a little, like he was trying to hide. Tyler is not a big guy, and I would have taken him, but something told me that I was not the reason for him to shrink down.

I turned and saw Emmett and he did not look pleased. I just closed my eyes and took a deep breath. Yes Emmett scared me, he was big and I would not stand a chance up against him in a fist fight.

"I think you and I need to talk." Emmett voice didn´t give anything away and somehow that scared me even more. I just nodded and Emmett started to walk, I looked down at the tray with food I was holding wondering what to do with it when Rose showed up. She took the tray not saying anything just gave me a nod and then I started to follow Emmett.

I was thinking that he would just stop outside the cafeteria away from the prying eyes of others. But he just kept walking, so I kept following. I was an 99% sure that he wouldn´t hurt me in any way. Bella had put a stop to that. She cared about me, and he cared about her. In some way he knew that hurting me would not be good for him.

When Emmett stopped we were kind of hidden behind some trees.

"I love that girl." He was pointing at something that was behind me so I looked at where he was pointing. And there was Bella and Alice. They were talking, kind of stiffly, but still talking. I like that, this would make both Alice my sister, twin, and partner in crime, and Bella happy. Hopefully they would be working things out.

But then what Emmett had said sunk in. He loved her. Okay, I could live with that. But I needed to know how he loved her. Because if he loved her more than a sister or friend he would make thing really hard at times. I was sure of that.

Emmett snorted. "Like a sister." He said amusement all over his face, like he knew what I was thinking. "I did how ever have other feelings for her in the beginning." His amusement disappeared a bit. "Not that she ever noticed." he was mumbling that last part.

And that made me smile, I just couldn´t help it. "She never notice any things like that. Half of the class looked at her with lust and the half that didn´t were either gay, been beaten up by me or was afraid of a beating." I looked straight at Emmett. So he had been beating up some guys, so what. I would take that beating if I had to. I think. Yeah I would, Bella would be worth it.

"Why are you telling me this?" I had to asked, because I had to know. Why would he be telling me this, what would he have to gain from it?

"First, because I hoped the fact that I had beaten up some kids because they looked at her in a way I didn´t approve of would scare you a bit. Secondly, because I really care for her in a way that I really can't explain. I don´t want her as my girlfriend or anything. We have a bond that I don't share with anyone else. You can't make that go away, no one can. Bella likes you god knows I don't. I have hated you since the stupid letter and I know that if it wasn´t for Bella I would kick your ass. But I would do anything for Bella and I mean anything. Even of that means that I have to try and like you." That threw me right for a loop, he wanted to be friends with me?

I knew that Bella would want us to, but that he would actually try it for her threw me off. I had been expecting something like, "Bella likes you so, we will fake friends for her, Okay!"

"Bella would not have been happy if she found out that we were trying to fake a friendship for her." his voice was low. "and either way, I don't really have a reason not to be friends with you. All you ever did was write a letter telling her how you felt at the moment. You didn´t know what she was going through and that was her fault."

"Maybe so, but I really should not have done that." I was shaking my head. "I should have known that something was up, it wasn´t like her to ignore Alice. Alice did always have a way of getting her to do things that she wouldn´t normally do."

Emmett let out a small laugh at that, "Only Bella can get someone to regret something that they had every right to do." He cocked his head "You do know that you two haven´t even had your first date and she already has you wrapped around her fingers right?"

I just nodded. He had me there, I would do everything for her. Hopefully she didn´t know it yet. Looking over at Alice and Bella I saw them hugging, before they walked back toward the school building. They were talking and it looked like they were laughing a bit to, or maybe that was just me hoping?

Emmett hit me on the back as he laughed "You have it bad."

We walked back to the school, as we entered the lunch room I noticed Bella and Alice standing in line to get some food. Looking over at Rose and Jasper I saw my own tray with the food I had bought. I walked over to them and put my hand on Bella´s back, she stiffened a little before she looked at me and relaxed.

"hi." she said as she smiled a small shy smile tat me.

"I have got some food for you." she looked a little shocked, before she thanked me. "HEY!" Alice yelled. "What about me?" she pouted.

I just laughed and said that it was plenty and she nodded and we walked over to eat.

BPOV

Alice and I went in to the cafeteria, I looked over where Alice used to sit with Emmett, Jasper, Rose and of course Edward. To my surprise Edward nor Emmett were there.

God I hope Emmett are playing nice. I don't want any more shit. Not now that I think Alice and I have worked some things out.

We stood in the lunch line when someone put there arm around me. "You know that you will get bored with Edward really quick right?" It was Mike Newton, he was standing all to close. I tried to step out of his hold, but that just made him pull me tighter to him. "Edward is a stay at home kind of guy and we all know that you would like some action in your life."

I had seen guys act like this before, but I had never had it happen to me. So I didn´t know what to do or say. I have of course seen films where the girl just turned around and said something to turn down the guy not so gently, but my mind was blank. So just as I was about to say that I didn´t care. Someone talked for me.

"And you think you can give her more action then him? Dream on Newton. Edward has way more stamina then you." It was loud and clear, but then she got closer to him and said in a low voice. "Edward can run circles around you on the soccer field, and I guess that´s not the only place he can do that." Mike was out of there really quick after that. I looked up to Rose and smiled my thanks as she made her way back to our table.

"They used to be best-friends. So why would he say something like that?"

Alice started to giggle, "Yeah they were best-friend, but when Mike started to hit on me a few years ago. They kind of got in to a fight. And put in to the mix that Edward got a lot, a lot, a lot of attention from the girls here they had a falling out. So they are friends, but not at all as good as they were."

We stood there and the line was moving so slow, We would be lucky if we even got something to eat at all before class.

Ones again I could feel a hand on my back, I could feel that it wasn´t Mike and it felt safe. But I could feel myself stiffen either way. All that was gone as I looked in to the green eyes that belongs to Edward.

I said as soft hi.

He bent down a little before he said he had gotten me some food.

I could hear Alice yell and then I heard Edward laugh as he said that he had some for her as well. Alice walked next to me and I think she was mumbling something like "He gets one kiss and he forgets about his sister, that's just wrong." Well I´m not completely sure that's what she said, but it sounded like that at least.

As we took our seats I sat between Edward and Emmett. I looked at Emmett and he gave me a big smile. I leaned over to him, I had to ask "Where were you?"

"We talked. We have an understanding." Was all I got. I didn´t like that. What did that mean, 'We have an understanding?' So I kicked his leg. Emmett jumped up and everyone at the table looked at him. He gave me a pissed off looked then took his seat again. "We are fine." he hissed at me as he sat.

I just smiled over sweetly at him. He could have just said that in the first place. Then I wouldn't have had to kick him and he knows it.

"So two days to we are going to Port Angeles." Emmett said to me.

"Why are you going there?" Edward asked just as his sister said, "Shopping, are you going shopping?"

"Car shopping. "Emmett said.

"Buh-hu. You can't go there without some real shopping." Rose nodded in agreement to Alice. "And you Bella need some new pants, almost ever par you have has holes in them. So cant we all go?"

Everyone nodded and I got a little scared. Alice was a monster when it came to shopping before, hopefully she was less of a monster now, but somehow I had my doubts.

The warning bell rang and we got up. I had next class with Edward and we walked next to each other.

"I´m a little scared about shopping with her." I said slowly and almost as an whisper.

"And you should be. You haven´t seen her shop in over eight years and I think she's gotten worse every time. So I kind of pity you."

Edward took my hand and pulled me with him, I didn´t even notice that I had stopped walking.

"You kidding right?"

That had to be true because Edward started to laugh. Just as I started to relax again I heard him say.

"No, definitely not kidding. "

* * *

AN:

I´m again sorry fore the late update and some more bad news, I just got a new job, and it´s taking a lot more time getting in to it then i thought it would. So I dont really know when I will get to update next. I have some free time next week between traveling, so hopefully I will get some writing done then.

But tell me what you think?

Hate it? Liked it?

Please do tell.

And I just have to thank my beta Kimmie-LOVE71 for her time to look over my work.

*SeeS*


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